Is it normal for my husband to jerk his thing all through the night?

Question

For the past month I have been awakening to my husband jerking his penis all through the night. When he thinks I've gone to sleep, he'll break away from me and scoot all the way to his side, pull down his pants and go to town. When I wake up or open my eyes, he stops. This happens all through the night every night. Sometimes I wake up and he's right next to me seemingly making gestures toward me as he's doing this. If he wanted to do something, all he would need to do is come over to me. When it first started happening I woke up and tried to respond because I thought he was initiating something, but he just turned over and pretended to be sleeping. This has even happened on nights that we've already had sex. I have called him on this the past three nights and even grabbed his hand when he was doing it once when he thought I was asleep. He angrily denies doing this. What is the problem here? I feel like this is not normal and that he's thinking about someone else when he's doing this.

Answer 1

BECAUSE HE IS A MAN AND HE CAN!!! That's why....now, here's what you do. Next time you catch him, turn on the light and tell him you want to watch. He thinks this is the best thing next to sliced bread and he's been doing it since he was 12 and will until he dies. If that doesn't work; tell him he needs to jerk in private.

Answer 2

he defitenly needs some kind of help,this is not normal and too deep for the average person to figure out.speaking as a man, the real thing is a whole lot better than your hand.a perfect love making session to me is if both climax together and then go to la la land together.done right your too tired to need any more. i would suggest a sex therphest,one that is older and married.i believe that when two people love each other that nothing should be held back,as long as the others agrees.just because your married does not mean you owe him sex.what i am going to tell you is about me not him,ido not know him.the first 10 years of marrage i masterbated alot,sometimes 5 or 6 times a day.it relieved a lot of stress and felt good; i was horney.my (WIFE) was not a good lover,but when your married your married and the strange thing is that we had six kids. now wait let me finish my story,10 years later,one day while making love she started making love incredible and when i tried to craw away,she pulled me back,something happened.i guess my patience paid off.i also learned that men come into their sexual peek from 14 to 26 and women come into theirs from about 30 to when ever.please do not make him think there is a problem,that will only make him feel guilty,but do not accept,or allow another women to come between you cause if that happens it will only make things worse. i do not know you,but i know that YOU are women enough for him and that you care for him very deeply.

Answer 3

This is such a real question, I am glad you asked it.
That being said, I have first hand experience with something like this and being a female I can relate to your position. I have encountered this with a man I was dating for a couple years we lived together and I felt like you hurt, rejected, horny some nights. It was a real problem for me a few times I left the bed and slept on the couch because I just couldnt sleep waiting for the inevitable. I hoped against hope he would stop, but he didnt. Also, I have a son that is thirteen and in having him since birth I have had the opportunity to see the relationship males have with their penis'. It starts in childhood. I dont think it is a slight against you. It is something he has been doing for years. If you can please get over it. It is disturbing and I think the men need to realise how bothersome it is to women. No matter how far you move to the edge of the bed we know by the movement and change in breathing patterns, dont fool yourselves men its hard to hide.
I think it feels good to men and they do it to relax. I would say just get over it. It isnt worth ending a relationship over just chalk it up to that old saying, "Men are nasty." You now know something more about your husband than you did in the beginning. Good Luck to you.

Answer 4

I personally think it's ridiculous for you to think he's thinking about someone else, or "mentally" cheating! Maybe he just gets hard a lot,. My BF is hard like every minute of the day, even after we've had sex. Some guys are just built like that. And it's hard for him to sleep, or do anything when he's got a raging hard on. Instead of confronting him like he's a little kid who's done something wrong, be like "hey baby, what are you doing, Can I help out?" If he says no go back to sleep and if he says yes you get lucky again. Either way, at least he's home in bed jerking it next to you instead of off jerking it for some other chick. you have NOTHING to worry about....trust me!

Answer 5

You spoiled him, that's the concern. he's used to you pampering him and doting on him each and all of the time. i think of a lot of guys in basic terms choose a spouse to prepare dinner, clean etc, and there have been rather some men to pass so some distance as to admit to that to me. anyhow, i might recommend some variety of counseling for the two one in each and every of you. yet attempt to chat issues out first, tell him precisely the style you sense. and initiate doing much less around the abode. have not got dinner waiting, pass paying for after artwork and don't answer your telephone...he would be thinking the place the heck you're and take exhilaration in you greater. and a few ppl say that would desire to be enjoying video games, even though it rather is rather no longer. it rather is proving a factor. as quickly as your no longer around each and all of the time waiting on him hand and foot, he will initiate lacking it and appreciating it greater.

Answer 6

Trust me, this has nothing to do with you even though it will probably tear away at your self esteem for years, no matter how many people tell you that. Your hubby has issues right now that he may be ashamed to talk about - unresolved feelings or issues that he is trying to work out. It could be a lot deeper than that and he really needs to be able to talk to someone. He may speak to you if he trusts you enough or he may need to see a therapist. You also haven't mentioned how old he is, how long have you been married, etc. Just remember -- it isn't about you or anything that's your fault -- And you can't change him or help him unless he wants help himself

Answer 7

You need to be talking to him about it...if he denies it then grab him in mid "jerk" and tell him no more jacking his thang until he does some jaw jacking and talks to you about why he's doing this...

Don't get all bent out of shape over it though...and don't get worked up that he might be thinking about someone else...it's QUITE normal for people (men and women) to think about someone else during sex on occasion...either someone they know, a fantasy person/celebrity, or just a faceless someone...it doesn't mean they aren't satisfied with or don't love their partner...

It is odd that he's masturbating so much though, and won't admit it...sleep masturbation? If people can walk in their sleep, no reson they can't jack off...

Answer 8

I really don't think it's normal, esp since he can have normal sex with you (it would be different if you said that you weren't giving him any). But he first has to acknowledge that there is a problem, and he need to speak with his doctor about it. But until he agrees to go, maybe you should start sleeping in a different room (or get him to) since it's keeping you from sleeping well. Maybe that will make him realize there's something wrong.

Answer 9

There is a good chance that he is thinking of something you won't do for him. I won't pretend to know you and he but he is certainly not satisfied with your performance. Don't be defencive. I am trying to help you. He doesn't want to hurt your feelings. That is why he denies the obvious. This means he still loves you. If you know what it is, do it. In his psychy, not doing it will make him feel unwanted in your bed/home. This is the only, best, tried and true way to push your man into the arm, home and bed of another woman. You certainly don't want that, do you? Give him what he needs. Be exploritive even. Role play if he wishes but don't be a defencive, greedy lover. Remember, the bed, like the home, goes where the woman leads it. Lead him into you not her. If you wish more advice e-mail me at [e-mail]. Best of luck.

Answer 10

This can be normal /maybe/ if he has some desist on it /fungus whatever.../ or same allergy. Take a look.
Use your hand and hold it or jerk his penis and see what happened.
Maybe he needs make more love and not be see as not normal.
If my advice didn't solve the problem ask some professional sexology's.