i love to have guy friends but they only think about as sexual objects. what can i do?
any kid intrested on having just a friend ?
2006-08-17 12:29:57 · 23 answers · asked by unike 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
tell them straight up
2006-08-17 12:32:51 · answer #1 · answered by mastayu1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ever watch When Harry Met Sally? It'll answer your question in a most cynical way. In short: men and women can NEVER be friends. Sexual tension always gets in the way.
To be less of a movie and more realistic, men and women can be friends. I personally know of many girls with whom I like to hang out and talk, go catch lunch, what have you, and I have no interest in anything more. It's perfectly possible. Or as one of them put it bluntly, "You're cool, but I wouldn't EVER even CONSIDER going out with you!" Not that I was interested in her anyway, but still, ouch. =P
If you get the feeling that guys are only interested in you as a "sex object," maybe you can just take a step back and re-evaluate. Have you done anything that might have given them the wrong idea e.g. touch them in a flirtatious way, dress up especially nicely for them, etc.? If so, maybe tone it down?
As for them: I can understand if they all want to be in a relationship with you. That's acceptable, and if you don't want to reciprocate, then just make it clear. Communication is always a good thing. If all they want is sex and nothing else, well, then, I think hookers are a pretty good solution, yes?
Again, to reiterate, communication is very important. If you want to be friends, why not just say so? I admit, I'm relatively straightforward, and others might prefer to be a bit less blunt, but, for me, anyway, talking is usually the best course of action.
2006-08-17 19:43:37 · answer #2 · answered by Knows what he is talking about 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you want a guy for a Friend, then you do what something from them...friendship. Just make that clear at the start, you just want to be Friends. Plenty of guys have or would like to have women Friends.
2006-08-17 19:35:21 · answer #3 · answered by null_the_living_darkness 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay you won't no matter what. The only reason guys are friends with us is for one reason... they would sleep with us PERIOD. You can ask any guy that you are friends with and they will tell you, if they don't then they are just too cowardly to tell you. My best friends have been guys before and we never had anything between us but that doesn't mean that isn't what they wanted, they will tell you that yeah we are friends, would they do something more if given the opportunity, you bet!
2006-08-17 19:35:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The thing is ... maybe you will want more eventually?
Guys, with good reason, tend to turn "I want to be friends"
into one of "I don't like you go away" or "I want to have sex
with you now".
This is because women frequently euphemize what they want
(that is, they don't say it directly). Guys simply learn that women
don't say what they mean...
The only way to get there is through trust and time.
You invite him to do things that are non-sexual, you don't
ever send sexual signals, and eventually, he might actually
catch on that you have value purely as a friend.
2006-08-17 19:35:46 · answer #5 · answered by Elana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This must be one of man's (and woman's) most asked questions since the dawn of time!, simply it's impossible...us men have one thing on our mind, most of the time. when we dont its because your our sister or you are not that atractive, sorry but i'm being brutaly honest!.
When we try to engage in a friendship with a woman it will eventualy lead into something more, so when we get the balls to try,or, enough beer in our bellies, we will try to sleep with you!. You must understand that it's not our fault, mother nature has provided us with Testosterone, a male sex Hormone which we have to submit to when it takes hold of us, it's just nature's way!!, so beware! we want to get into you, and your panties!.
2006-08-17 20:03:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u hav to laugh all the time. kid wit them,so they will love u and wont c u as a object..
RELAX
act like they r a girl, or act like ur a boy.
talk about wat u want.
joke.
b a easy-going girl.
i hav MANY bfs, most of them want me,but not in a sexual way..they want me as a part in their life,so enjoy time.
having bfs is wonderful.
well.do wat i say..
sometimes dont do make-up, JUST b urself..
well this is the BEST ANSWER,trust me..
and dont say 'just friend', say 'good friends'
respect boys for who they r,they WILL respect u too
boys r not monsters..
2006-08-17 20:34:10 · answer #7 · answered by she-ra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, reallyyyy simple. if they flirt dont flirt back, be kind, call, e-mail, hang out so easy.. take this advice cuz its coming from a guy
:)
i take offense to some of your comments, i do not think of girls as sex objects... believe in the end, sex with people is just ... stupid
2006-08-17 19:34:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be friends, but don't be flirty. And i agree, you should tell them straight up, but only if it seems that they are floating in that direction. If you tell them too sson, you may ruin the friendship that could have been.
2006-08-17 19:34:30 · answer #9 · answered by D.M.H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them that you just want to be friends, if they decline, their loss right, i'm looking for some new friends too!
2006-08-17 19:34:14 · answer #10 · answered by Kulwant S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you mean on hear good luck, if you mean at home or school, tell them and be strait to the point, you just want a friend, that is if thy are not trying to be a friend, and thy are just trying to grope you.
2006-08-17 19:37:57 · answer #11 · answered by gamemanual 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋