He insists he has hair hang over his eyes, and when I say 'get that hair outta your eyes' he goes 'no its in style.' Then he goes to school sometimes dressed like these 'goth' people with baggy black shorts and a Motley Crue t-shirt. Am I being a bad mom to let him appear in public like that or should I let him be himself and let it slide.
2006-08-17 12:18:04 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
You should let him dress how he feels is best. I was pretty much the metal head goth with the motley crue and bauhaus idolation and my parents hated it but they realized that if i dressed like all the other girls that i would not be who I am, i would lose my individualtiy and blend in. Thats a sad prospect because then you get thrown into the catagory of prep which is often the guys who party and are promiscuous. He is fine and will be very depressed if you try to change him or dont accept him. He is at a very vital point in his life so let him be who he is. Most of the time its a phase but if it isnt will it kill you?
2006-08-17 12:37:25 · answer #1 · answered by marishka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha, motley crue should not be used in the same sentence as goth, unless there's an 'isnt' between them. okay, you're son has great taste in music, anyway. i think that hes just in a rocker phase, and he will eventually grow out of it, or end up like Tommy Lee (just kidding, wow that's a moms worst nightmare huh?) either you can :
1. try to stop him from looking this way, and make him look exactly how you want him to, so he can never express himself in a way that people can take first impressions out of and they will think hes someone he obviously isn't (i.e. dressed in a polo shirt). plus, he will be very angry, and might even rebel.
OR
2. let him stay like he wants to be. if he chooses to portray a certain image he must have a reason, or it just expresses who he truly is. and he will be glad he has an understanding parent who will let him be himself.
(coming from a 14 year-old girl who's mom just burned her Slayer tee shirts, and handed her a pink skirt, this advice should be very helpful.)
-Julie Vee
2006-08-18 04:17:53 · answer #2 · answered by periwink202 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is normal at this age, i went through the same thing with dyin my hair different colors and wearing wierd clothes, im 22 and still have a motley crue shirt. My mom let me do as i pleased as she knew that i would out grow it and it was just a stage i was going through, she always said it could be alot worse, like drugs and alcohol that i was doing rather than just being different with my hair and clothes, so let him be himself and it will pass.
2006-08-17 19:45:39 · answer #3 · answered by mommy2thomasandtessa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shaggy hair IS the style. So are baggy pants. lol
He is just trying to fit in.
Thats not a hippie style. Believe me. I dress like a hippie all the time. lol
2006-08-18 17:00:22 · answer #4 · answered by tangerine9561 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes let him be, he has to find himself. I understand you as a mother fully,but they kids in our day and age have a different outloock . I warn you he might grow out faster when somebody in school says something to him, he might not. So don't get mad enjoy him that way. I know ,I 'm a mother too, just keep talking to him and dont push him,keep the line between you and him open.
2006-08-17 19:30:43 · answer #5 · answered by diamantenkitty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What hippee means to us teens nowadays, are tree-hugging, tie-die shirt wearing, afro-having, peaceful people that call themselves "non-comformist." A real hippee is simply a noncomformist.
He's 13, for some people it's in style. Don't bother, that's something he should grow out of on his own. Don't worry about it, if you worry about him, you're probably a good mom, don't doubt yourself. You might want to watch him though, he might cut himself to seem cool in front of his friends. Some wannabe's (no offense but your son sounds like one) tend to do stupid things to fit in the crowd they're with.
2006-08-17 19:29:01 · answer #6 · answered by cyn1c4l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are a great mom for allowing him to be himself. If he is comfortable and happy being like that then good for him! I think he's at a crucial age where he is trying to find himself...my advice, just let him be, as long as he's not hurting himself in anyway...and hey, let him start earning his own cash to pay for his clothes...
2006-08-17 19:28:44 · answer #7 · answered by KnA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi, i have a 13 yr old... and lets just say... YOU need to buy gears that don't reflect what your concern is... he is 13 and still needs his mom to give him the tools to be... so yep cut his hair and throw his old yak clothes out...let your son come with you and both meet half way on the clothes... remember you are mom... you won't be letting him down on finding himself..just this way, he does it in style... good luck with whatever you may do....
2006-08-17 19:31:34 · answer #8 · answered by MUM D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is just trying to express his individuality. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. If that is the worst of your worries, consider yourself lucky. If he is a good kid who doesn't get into any trouble that's all that matters.
2006-08-17 19:38:39 · answer #9 · answered by latingirl0527 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as he has good grades and isn't on drugs or anything like that, let him wear what he wants to. just remember that it isn't permanent and pray that the style changes quickly.
2006-08-17 19:28:24 · answer #10 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋