boy friend doesnt show any emotion in bed?

Question

My boyfriend and i have been together for 3 years and we have a wonderful relationship except for when we make love he doesnt show any emotion no noises no nothing and some times i think it is something i am doing wrong i have asked him about this and he says he doesnt mean anything by it he loves me and he loves when we have sex together. He is very attentive to me in bed but he just doesnt show any emotion does any one out there know how i feel or am i just crazy any help will be great

Answer 1

Teach him how to express himself. He just does not know how. A more important question might be how do you feel about his efforts. Sex can be the best expression of Love. This is why it is often called "making love."

Does he FEEL like a robot just going through the moves or is the emotion there but not the "noise" you expect? Do you want expression of emotion or a "very good act?"

Look at your own behavior during sex. Do you just make animal noises or you you tell him "I love it when you do that."? Communication is the real key to any relationship. Tell him of your disappointment and work together at a solution.

Answer 2

I understand how you feel. I had a girlfriend a long time ago who didn't make a sound or move very much at all during sex. It was very unsettling. I was never sure that I had given her pleasure because there was very little reaction. When I asked her about it, she always said that it was great.

Anyway, talk to him about this. That's the solution to most things.

He may be concentrating very hard to delay his orgasm for you. If so, he's not going to react very much. If this is the case, he needs to learn to control his orgasms a different way. He'll have a lot more fun.

The article below might be useful if my speculation is correct.

Answer 3

I know what u mean. perhaps at home he was raised with little love and emotion.. i hate to think they are some wot adht or autistic or slightly less social skilled or um like Jason in the halloween movie that syndrome people have with no emotion I hate that !! it isn't as wonderful as u think it is not U it is them.. u Wonder how close are u how we doing u feel any intensiveness perhaps they are psychotic and go thru their fantasies of others when they are with u there is def a loose wire tho take my word a syndrome or something..

Answer 4

Has he always been this way, or was it just lately you noticed the change in his behavior? If he was more emotional before, than yes, there is definately something wrong. Perhaps he's cheating? But if he's always been this way, I wouldn't sweat it. That maybe if you tried to make up for the both of you, make a real ruckess during sex, he would get a clue....

Answer 5

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!
He might just be trying to keep focus.....or he might be ashamed or uncomfortable about how he looks to you.
When you do stuff to him, ask him here and there "how am I doing? Do you like this or that?" Tell him that a reaction tells you how your are doing and encourages you.
If he cares about you, he will listen and care when you tell him what it would take from him to make you feel how you want to feel (appreciated, sexy, #1, etc). Guys are dumb about this stuff so put the dots close together and spell it out for him. Whatever you do, don't make it sould like a criticism or complaint. Don't make him feel like a disappointment or he will trun away from you and cheat with porn or other girls.....
Let him know how great if felt when he did *** to you, and what would he like from you? Tell him you want to hear him groan and see him squirm, and how sexy that is.....the point is to reinforce the good stuff, and instigate it by using yourself as an example....

Answer 6

If all else is fine then I would not be too persuasive or overly persistent on the matter. Instead you may want to try talking to him(sweetly of course) doing sex and encourage him to do the same. This may be a start to help him out of his silent shell. Ask him what he likes...experiment and gently try to find ways to entice him. This in itself can be fun. I think it is just his way and with a little ingenuity on your part you may be able to bring more out of him. Be careful though. Don't ruin what you already have.

Answer 7

I know exactly how you feel trust me. How do you think i felt i had a woman that did that **** a long time ago. I guess the man jsut gets bored with doing the same thing over and over. Suprise him and change it up a little bit. Find out what he likes most about sex stuff and then do it. Trust me. Spice it up a bit...

Answer 8

It doesnt mean that he isnt into it or dislike it, it could just mean that he is quiet and really dont see any use in making noises. Me and my husband very seldomly make noises so I dont think it means anything. If it has been working for three years dont worry about it.

Answer 9

It almost sounds as if he has issues from the past. I don't think it is normal for anyone to be quiet while making love, but don't expect a Hallmark moment every time. If you pressure him, you'll make him self conscious of his performance. Have you tried to go someplace where absolutely NO ONE can here you? Maybe he has performance anxiety in a sense.

Answer 10

Contrary to popular belief. Men do have feelings. They clam up
under criticism, or what they percieve as criticism. Do more
hugging and touching after love-making. Get a little rowdy
yourself. If he doesn't respond. He might need professional help.

Answer 11

I wouldn't like a silent partner at all. I once dated a guy like that and it drove me crazy. I think it may just be something in your boyfriend's personality. I mean, if he's reaching ejaculation, he's obviously enjoying it. He may have some psychological reason for not wanting to just "let go" completely.