my boyfriend wants me to have an abortion?

Question

he says there is no risk for me now or in the fut ure as it is safe and risk free i dont want an abortion would it affect me having babys in the future or any risks

Answer 1

Yes, it could have an effect on your having future children and there are of course risks because it is a surgical procedure. It is pretty safe, but it is not "risk free". If you don't want to have an abortion, there are also psychological risks. Remember to think this carefully, if you are in a position to take care of a child or not, or if you are too young (if you are under 15 your body is not prepared for a child and an abortion is probably safer than having the child).

Answer 2

Of course there are risks!!!! This is one of those moral questions that without really knowing the circumstances no one can help you with. Abortion is a permanent decision that you have to live with for the rest of your life.
I had an abortion when I was 21(5 years ago) and it was the single worst decision I ever made. I think about it and regret it everyday. I got an infection from the procedure (It was preformed in a reputable clean clinic, and I followed all of the aftercare instructions. My infection developed within 24 hours.) Luckily I could still have children but that was a very real risk.
I now have 2 great kids (3 and 9 months) and whenever I look at them I can't help but think about this other what if baby.
I think you should talk about this with your parents. They probably know you just about as well as anybody can, and would have your best interests in their hearts.
I don't want this to sound like I think abortion should be illegal or anything. I strongly believe in every ones right to choose, but it isn't a decision that should be made because a boyfriend tells you too.

Answer 3

It is a low-risk surgery--most women have no severe complications--but it is not risk-free. If you're not very young or very unhealthy, it would be less risky to have the baby.

But that's the thing: Having an abortion is surgery. There can be complications; and one of those complications is infertility. There can also be psychological problems--depression, etc.--associated with not having a baby you would otherwise have had.

This is your decision, not your boyfriend's; and this is your pregnancy. If you want to have the baby, then you should have the baby. If you can't be a parent right now, there are many people who would be glad to raise the baby... My best friend is adopted; and she is very happy. It's a lot of pain for the birth-mother, of course... my friend tells me she thinks her birthmother must have chosen to suffer so that she would not; and it worked.

In any event, you are in a very difficult situation; and you really shouldn't go it alone. Find yourself someone you can confide in--friend, parent, spiritual leader, whatever--and make the best choice you can, for yourself and for the future of that which you are carrying.

Answer 4

This should be your decision, not your boyfriend's. Talk to your doctor about the risks - even if they are relatively low, they still exist. You may end up not being able to have children in the future. Also, most likely, you will have regrets (especially that you don't want an abortion). Find some friend who will support you. Once you have your baby, you will love her/him, and you won't believe you were ever thinking about terminating your pregnancy!

Answer 5

I seriously think that if u dont want one--dont get one!! i respect abortion and everyone that does one has its reasons. But if someone else is pressuring u to do it--I dont think u should do it--because u will regret it every single day of ur life---and always wonder what ur baby would of looked like, how old whould he be, and all those things. No one guarantees u that ur boyfriend will be there for ever for all u know next week he may walk out of ur life.
Do it if u want to ONLY!!! Not to satisfy someone else!!!!

and about the risks--they are pretty safe something may go wrong but the chances are very minimal---

Answer 6

It's your decision. An abortion performed by a medical professional is safe and will not affect your ability to have kids in the future.

There may be some mental challenges that you will have to deal with if you choose to get an abortion.

You and your circumstances will determine your best course of action. If you choose to get an abortion, don't let anti-abortion activists or religious types make you feel bad about it. If you choose to have the baby, be responsible for it, bring it up right, or give it to another couple though adoption.

Visit planned parenthood for helpful and professional information and help. It's free.

Answer 7

Abortion is NOT "safe and risk-free!" There are immediate risks and future side effects with every abortion, including potential harm to your ability to bear a child later. See:

Abortion Risks:
http://afterabortion.info/complic.html
http://www.abortionfacts.com/reardon/effect_of_abortion.asp
http://www.standupgirl.com/site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=218&Itemid=40

Abortion Deaths:
http://www.lifedynamics.com/Pro-life_Group/Pro-choice_Women
http://www.afterabortion.info/news/abortiondeaths.html
http://www.lifeissues.org/ru486/deaths.htm

The thing to remember is that abortion is a blind procedure. The abortionist cannot see what he is doing as he inserts sharp instruments into your womb, and he may puncture your uterus, bowel, or bladder, or permanently damage the lining of your womb. Also, your cervix (tightly closed to protect your baby) must be forced open in an abortion, often causing tears and permanent damage.

If your boyfriend loves you, he will not ask you to kill your child and put yourself at risk! Please do what is right and protect yourself and your child. No man is worth the life of your baby. Boyfriends come and go, but your child is your child forever, and he or she is depending on you for love and protection. Maybe your boyfriend will come around and maybe not, but either way, you will find out what kind of man he really is.

Here's more information that you might need:

Photos of Abortions, Including 1st Trimester Abortions:
http://www.cbrinfo.org/Resources/pictures.html

A Four-Minute, Must-See Video on Abortion:
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-4-video.html

Information on All Aspects of Abortion:
http://Abort73.com

Photos and Facts About Prenatal Development:
http://www.justthefacts.org/clar.asp
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-A-2-prenatal.html
http://www.studentsforlife.uct.ac.za/foetal%20dev%20photos.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/in_pictures/3847319.stm
http://www.lifeissues.org/ultrasound/11weeks.htm

Pain Perception in the Unborn:
http://www.advocatesfortheinnocent.com/fetalpain.html

Abortion Stories:
http://abortiontv.com/Words/truestoriesfrom-mothers.htm
http://www.abort73.com/HTML/I-G-2-testimony.html

Free, Confidential Pregnancy Help (including referrals for financial, medical, legal, and housing assistance; free pregnancy tests and ultrasounds; free maternity and baby supplies; pregnancy, parenting, and adoption information; counseling and emotional support):
http://www.optionline.org/advantage.asp

Support for Pregnant Teens:
http://standupgirl.com/site/index.php

Support for Pregnant College and Career Women:
http://www.nurturingnetwork.org

Answer 8

Your bf doesn't want to pay child support. Look into all your options, ask yourself these questions:
1. Can I take care of a child on my own? Do I have the money? Patience? Support? ect.
2. Could I give the child up for adoption?
3. Is my fear not being able to have children in the future my only reason for not aborting? or am I morally against it.
What ever you decide will not only affect you but also your child, parents, friends, boyfriend, his family.....alot rides on this. Don't be stupid about it.

Answer 9

It would depend if you have the best of care and then it still is not 100 percent that you might have some damage. Your boyfriend does not own your body. You have to decide. Not only do youhave to talk to decent people in a good clinic but also someone who can advice you on your emotional state after the abortion. Mind you I do not have a problem with a woman having the right to choose.

Answer 10

Ok look at this realistically. This is your body. If you want this baby thisis your choice only. No one can tell you what to do. he is telling to you make a life choice. One thing about abortion is that there can be something that goes wrong.

I have a 3 month old daughter and when we found out I was prengnant my boyfriend and I had just broken up. We still stayed broken up until I was 7 months. But I was determined to keep my baby. I wasnt gonna put myself threw that trauma.

Sweetie go with how you feel. My daughter has brought so much to me in these past 3 months. Its so worth it.