Why would my hubby do this?

Question

If my husband and another married woman who we are both common friends with her and her hub. If my hub and that woman made out and kissed at her place like 2 years ago. Then through some conversation they talked about not taking things further because they are married and because it would hurt them, fine. But when they meet at public parties, they do flirt, stare at each other, smile, talk, dance and all. Fine with me as long as they don't kiss and make out again. But let me ask you even now after 2 years when my hub sees the woman, why does he stare in her eyes. Why is it possible for the woman and my hub to look at each other, maintain the gaze. Then when the woman is about to leave from a place, she stands in front of my hub and my hub looks in her eyes and to her shirt, and back to her again and keeps it there. they talk, and at times smile softly, gaze at each other and then look away. Well those two do have a habit fo writing the friendly how are yous, whats the weekend

plan, about their feelings, their jobs. The woman is the one who writes the emails and it is my hub who always replies back to her, so that is still telling her that he is interested. But how is that even if them two dont have sex or go further again, why do they stare? Is it simply because my husband really likes the woman, perhaps has an emotional attachment with her, and finds her attractive? he looks at her and observes her when ever he can even now after 2 years, and that is after 8/9 months of not even seeing her. Why is that?

Answer 1

Sounds like these two have a natural connection and enjoy flirting. For them it is probably is kind of like having a backup in case anything ever goes wrong in their marriages. They always know there is someone there who finds them sexy and is attracted to them. Personally my wife would cut off my balls and send me packing if I acted that way around another women, especially right in front of her.

Answer 2

Face the obvious, they both still desire each other and since you stayed with your husband after finding out about their past, why should he feel he need to respect you when you have accepted his ways.

I say a marriage that lack respect lacks respect and when there is no respect any and everything can happen and it has because you now have these two making contact and flirting right in front of you and its obvious and not hidden from your view.

I question what they both think of you by doing such disrespectful acts. I don't see what's to stop these two from having other encounters like the first.

If your going to stay in a marriage of such disrespect, you only have yourself to blame for being treated with such disrespect.

Can't no body treat you worse than you allow yourself to be treated when you know the deal and your trying to get a answer for the obvious.

They desire each other and that's it.

Answer 3

I'm sorry and why are you still married to this man. You know that he wants to be with someone else, so I'm not really sure why you put yourself through all this pain. You already know that they made out (now I know that you can still forgive him for this), but I don't think I could since neither of them really give you the respect that you deserve. If they are still flirting, dancing, and all that in front of you....well I just think that it is very rude. He isn't sorry for what he did and he will probably do it again and maybe more the next time. So, like I said....why are you still with him?

Answer 4

Your husband is longing for this woman, even after 2 yrs. It's quite possible that they're in love with each other and the fact that they both can't have each other makes it even more enticing for them. They don't sleep together because of their agreement with each other but don't kid yourself. I don't know if you have spoken to your husband about this but if you haven't already...what's taking you so long? You are in a way, telling your husband that this is okay with you. And since this is your attitude about this, then learn to live with the possibility that your husband and this woman desire each other and may always will.

Answer 5

There might be something going on that he's not telling you about. Although if they are flirting in front of you there might not be anything going on yet. But it definately sounds like they like each other more than a little. If they start acting completly different than they do now at some point (like ignoring each other) you should really start to worry. You should talk to your husband about it though and tell him to stop flirting.

Answer 6

There could be some attraction,but if your husband hasn't fallen yet he won't. You can have a attraction there ,but not do anything I have pretty women friends,but that doesn't mean I will sleep with them. She could be realizing something like he has qualities that her husband don't have,but never cross the line. Be blunt in your friendship if you suspect something. That will really test your friendship,but at least you will know and trust your intuition.

Answer 7

I would let my husband know how I feel, and I will personally tell that 'friend' not to email my husband anymore.

Where you guys married at that time when the makeout happend?

If not that its ok, s-h-i-t happens. But if so, than you need to make it clear to your husband!




And I totally complelty agree with the avove answer!

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Answer 8

you need to not only be a lover to your hubby . But also a friend. some one looking for quality of friend can also find infatuation. if it is cramping your relationship then you need to communicate about it and together look for a solution. If it cant be resolved then fix it your self. quit while your ahead unless there are children involved

Answer 9

Sounds like they have a connection - you need to open your eyes and see that this is something more than. I hate to say that it is love... maybe infatuation, lust, but it seems to be most definitely more than what you two are sharing. You need to have a talk with him... if he gets all defensive with you than you will know.

Answer 10

I wouldn't tolerate that crap. He obviously wants her and she obviously wants him. What the two of them are doing is disrespectful to all involved. That behavior needs to stop. I have a tendency to believe they have slept with each other and are still doing so