My husband left me for another woman a few months ago. We are in the middle of a messy separation. I am still in love with him and we still sleep together when he comes around. why would I do that and better yet why would he? the girlfriend does not know we sleep together. How do I stop such weird behavior?
2006-08-17 07:15:22 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We do have three children - they are fairly upset. My husband called last night and blamed me for the sleeping together because he is an alcoholic and said I took advantage of him while he was drunk. He also said he does not want me in our home and if I do not agree to his divorce demands he will cause us to go to court and lose everything. Can he do this? Do I have any protection?
2006-08-18 00:18:29 · update #1
you sleep with because he left you You did not leave him and you hope that this will bring him back and some men are just dogs that way if you let them use you they will till they get tired of you like he did in your marriage so when he gets tired of sleeping with you he dump you all over again girl get some SPUNK about your self and some heart tell him NO and mean it move on with your life he has moved on with somebody else but is using you for sex
2006-08-17 07:23:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should get yourself into a better mind set about yourself! He is just using you and this other women too. It sounds like that you are in love with him and are afraid of losing him but in reality haven't you lost already? I found out that if the other person is not willing to work on the relationship then there is little that can be done on your end. Don't go tit for tat either just stop your self destructive behavior and seek help not with friends or family but someone that is a professional that will be able to give you help. Take care of yourself first. Good luck
2006-08-17 14:37:08 · answer #2 · answered by chancesare45 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I went through a similar situation when I was 19. I got married when I was 16. A year after we was married my husband cheated on me with my best friend. It hurt me so bad I tried to commit suicide. I remember a nurse telling me "you'll get over it... just take one day at a time". My husband and I got back together off and on over the years. We was still married but he had his girlfriend on the side. One day I finally woke up and asked myself "why am I putting myself through this heartache over and over again?" My answer was I loved him and we had a child together.
But then I told myself if he loved me back he wouldn't be sleeping with someone else. Honey I know this may hurt but..... if he loved you back he wouldn't be putting you through this. He is only using you. In fact he is probally getting a kick out of the situation.
Be the stronger person and tell him your thru and then try to occupy your time. I did do by going back to school and getting my GED. Now I have an Associates and I'm working on Bachelors Degree. Not to mention I just opened my own Business.
You see we make excuses why we can't give the other person up but when it all boils down.... WE ARE WOMEN AND WE ARE STRONG HEARTED. We can do whatever we want with or without a man in our life. Best of wishes!!!! You'll get through this you'll see.
2006-08-17 14:37:48 · answer #3 · answered by shauna 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you could make sure his girlfriend finds out, but DO stop sleeping with him. Think of an image in your mind of he and the woman he LEFT you for, and keep it there. It will hurt, but you need to remember that he doesn't love you. He does love sex. Keep your contact to a mimimum, as some of the other respondants have said. Focus on yourself; spa day, holiday, ANY day, and do everything you can to make your skin crawl when you think of him touching you. I know it's hard to get over someone, but this is definitely someone you really need to get over. It's a moment-by-moment, day-by-day thing. Be strong, hun.
2006-08-17 14:35:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why are you sleeping with him if he's doin' someone else at the same time? First of all that is dangerous, second call the girlfriend and tell her, make him miserable and then move on. He is a jerk and he is probably sleeping with other women too. You have to keep telling yourself you deserve better and you do. Go out, have fun........without him.
2006-08-17 14:24:22 · answer #5 · answered by nahimana34 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't give him what he wants just because you think it will get him back. Stand up for yourself and take you and your feelings into consideration before his feelings. He is messing with your mind. Don't give into anything for him. Stop having sex with him no matter how bad you want it, he will never reconcile with you if you are meeting his needs now and then he can leave and not have to deal with everything else. Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free? You are top priority now, don't let what he says make you think any different.
2006-08-17 14:37:27 · answer #6 · answered by in love with superman 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
STOP GIVING HIM WHAT HE WANTS!!You are worth WAY more than that!Unless you enjoy being second choice or getting her sloppy seconds.You could be really cruel and have someone take pictures of you guys together(not in bed unless you want to go that far)or record a phone call or something of the like and spill the beans to his girlfriend.He'd be SO SCREWED!Payback's a real b****!Next time he comes by,look him over and say"Naah,I'm bored,you're not what I want." Make him feel like the piece of meat.Cause you're not anymore!
2006-08-17 14:28:30 · answer #7 · answered by L.T. 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Don't see him outside of court. Don't talk to him unless its about business (divorce). You ask why he is still sleeping with you. Why wouldn't he? You're letting him. He gets to bang two women with no consequences. That's OK with you? Do you think it will bring him back? Don't be naive. Go to a counselor and stop this self destructive behavior.
2006-08-17 14:23:05 · answer #8 · answered by taz4x4512 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Why are you belittling yourself & your children? There is no reason why you should be having a problem with letting him go! All that you have to do is open up your eyes and see that this jerk is playing you for a fool! And that you are alowing him to do this not only to you, but also to your children!!!!!! ( Not to mention, the woman that he had left you for)! Give him up and get a divorce!!!!! Think of your self & your children!!!!! Don't give him what he wants!
2006-08-21 10:57:04 · answer #9 · answered by bigred 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't sleep with him he is using you. I understand that you love him but you must be strong you deserve better than him sweetie.
Next time he comes around I would tell him what kind of man you need and that it is not him. Then I would get in touch with the girlfriend and tell her you have been sleeping with her bf and she got your sloppy seconds again and enjoy!!!
2006-08-17 14:27:32 · answer #10 · answered by daack7 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋