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Crush

I Iook at you
Across the room
And wonder
Do you think of me
No
Of course not
Its not how it works
You belong with a popular girl
Not the dorks
Not a shy lonely girl like me
Who under her skin
Is as beautiful as can be
But you don't see that
No one does
Your just a crush
You don't mean anything
Cuz' your just a crush.

2006-08-17 04:52:08 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities Books & Authors

31 answers

That's awesome... and a bit sad. I really like it.

2006-08-17 04:57:25 · answer #1 · answered by woodwinman 4 · 1 0

I like it. You can feel everything going on beneath the lines. It feels like you just poured yourself out onto the page, plus it's on a topic that everyone can understand. Sometimes simple - and I don't mean stupid! - language is best for things so fundamental. Your poem comes across as raw and honest and universal. And if this is based on something true, I bet it helped to get it out!

(I have to say - just a little editing grammar-wise, and it'll be perfect).

2006-08-22 22:59:12 · answer #2 · answered by Suzy1B 2 · 1 0

I like it! It may not be a prize-winner, but I can really relate to it, by switching the roles in my mind. I'm sure a lot of people can. You have the ability to touch people on a personal level. That, I think, is how great poetry starts.

2006-08-23 20:57:25 · answer #3 · answered by WillyC 5 · 0 0

Cast aside

Cast aside and thrown up the mercy of hell I was beaten down in to the flames to live an eternal life in the ever burning fire. Pain being my only future and the flames scorching, burning my body I look up at the black swirling sky. Just then just for a moment, I saw a brake in the clouds and curt a glimpse of haven and as I watched the pain faded as flames around me died in to distant memory. I saw a beautiful face, beautiful eyes and a beautiful smile. I stole a picture of haven in your face and the clouds closed up around you shutting me out. Again I was beaten down, beaten back in to the hellish flames.

lol sorry just had to. yours is ok, just looks like u need practise right often and right what u feel

2006-08-22 15:44:52 · answer #4 · answered by mort_the_apprentice 2 · 0 1

um...it's alright. i think it could be a great poem, because i like what you are trying to say in it, but i just think that you could use more detail or different wording or something. i don't know. but if you like it, then who am i to say any different.
but hey check out some of my poems that i posted on here and tell me what you think! they are a bit depressing, but i could use some feedback from a fellow writer. :-)
isn't writing awesome?? it's such a great outlet and a great way to express emotion. keep writing girl!

2006-08-17 12:02:33 · answer #5 · answered by lifeistough_period 1 · 0 0

Sweet and to the point. I just love poems written by others and that touches the person's heart!

Keep it up and don't stop writing !!

2006-08-24 14:44:05 · answer #6 · answered by Doc Rick 3 · 0 0

I really like it. I love rhyming poems so that's a big reason why i like this poem it has some rhymes in it. Anyway it's really good and i like the subject of it.

2006-08-24 22:04:44 · answer #7 · answered by jalisa08701 3 · 0 0

It's good because you expressed your feelings, how can you be wrong with that? It's nice seeing another poet. I write some poems. You can see them in the link in my profile if you wish :)

2006-08-17 12:03:03 · answer #8 · answered by Steph 4 · 1 0

Not bad. It's a sight better than I have ever done. It kinda shows how I have felt a couple of times before.

2006-08-17 19:04:20 · answer #9 · answered by myshortstory 2 · 1 0

When i first read it, it did not do anything for me. Then i read it three times and the more i read it the more i liked it. Yes! it's a good poem.

2006-08-24 23:46:32 · answer #10 · answered by candlelight 2 · 0 0

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2006-08-24 21:53:10 · answer #11 · answered by authorspost 1 · 0 1

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