we used to drink alone together in my room and we always talked about everything, frm the dumbest things up to the highest state we might ever known, in short we're very close to each other. But now things have been changed... maybe it's my fault because I got fall in love with her... but i really don't know if my feeling is true. I know it's wrong but I really can't help myself.
2006-08-17 04:18:15 · 41 answers · asked by kurapiket 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
we're legit 1st cousin...
2006-08-17 04:33:35 · update #1
I will greatly apreciate all your advices and comments..
2006-08-17 05:32:47 · update #2
I think the fact that you had many intimate conversations and spent a lot of time alone together is enough to make anyone feel in love with another...no matter what the relationship...friends,family,cousins.....It is quite possible that you are in love with her..but you say that she is a lesbian? is that correct?...and you are a male? is that correct?.....so why has the relationship changed? It is clear that whether you are 1st cousins or not she will not be attracted to you and you can continue the close bond because she will not be interested in sex with you if she is a lesbian. It is not wrong to love someone that you are very close to...but it wouldn't be in your best interest not to have sex together!
2006-08-24 15:59:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's straighten out our terms first of all. You've probably loved your cousin for years. What you are now faced with is the fact that you find her sexually attractive. For your sake and hers, don't confuse the two. Just because you feel the chemistry (sexual attraction) doesn't mean you love someone. And just because you love someone doesn't mean you'll be sexually attracted.
We too often mistake the longings and excitement of sexual attraction for love. Please don't misunderstand, I see nothing wrong with sexual attraction and wish we could be more honest about it with ourselves. However, our society has chosen to confuse the issue by referring to this wonderful natural phenomenon as love, or true love.
I'm not going to tell you that having feelings for your cousin is wrong, unnatural, perverted, etc. However, in several states it is unlawful to marry a cousin. There are cousins who do marry however, where it is legal. So, it's not an Oprah moment.
Like all friendships where one person becomes sexually or romantically interested, it presents a challenge. You either remain silent and leave things status quo, or you take a risk and see if the feelings are returned. There are no guarantees in human relationships. Best of luck.
2006-08-24 11:21:36 · answer #2 · answered by Magic One 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey you are only human, REMEMBER that, But if you are as close as you say then you may want to limit that and just know if you were to be found out by parents any family member how do you think they would feel? The term is called Kissing Cousin's. And do not be so hard on yourself but with our actions comes repercussions, Hope that she does not get pregnant the baby will come to be deformed. BLOOD RELATIVES don't mix. JUST STOP THIS SORT OF BEHAVIOR, It is not healthy. And if you do not you will come to hate each other. SO JUST STOP, And get to meeting someone you are not related to. THIS IS WHAT"S BEST. Take care
2006-08-24 12:17:24 · answer #3 · answered by sweettoni37 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's a lesbian so that's pretty much a lost cause and she's your cousin so I don't think you want to be barking up that tree, plus if your not even sure. Just walk away and start going out with a few girls, eventually you'll get over whatever this is.
P.S. Counseling would also be something to consider. Wish you luck dude.
Always Smiling, Ben
2006-08-22 15:42:21 · answer #4 · answered by Benjamin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it curiosity? She is a Lesbian, why would you want to even think of being with a Lesbian, then she is your Cousin, so that is 2 reasons NOT to be in love with her, if I were her I would stay as far away from you as I could. Sorry, but that is how I would feel if it were me. There are plenty of straight and bisexual women out there, why your Cousin? Just because you partied with her? That would be a severe mistake and create a wedge if you told her.
2006-08-22 09:47:57 · answer #5 · answered by spiritcavegrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you from Kentucky? No wait I live in Kentucky, never-mind.
Anyway, you just feel close to her because you two shared personal stories and secrets. Your love for her may not be legit. How close of cousins are you, is she 1st or 2nd? Or are you related just by a marriage?
Well, if you're 1st cousins you should stay away. As I said before you may just feel close to her because of the time you have shared together. In any case, incest is highly frowned upon and you may be better off hiding your feelings for her. Though, if you really do feel close to her, try telling her how you feel. If you are as close as you made it sound she may be willing to hear you out.
2006-08-17 04:29:04 · answer #6 · answered by TikiTantrum 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there is such a social stigma behind "incestual relationships" but there is no proof, and actually has been disproven, that there is any birth defects to children born to cousins. I think the birth defect issue was everyone's big problem with it. I think if you pursue something with your cousin you are going to have problems with society, you will not be accepted, but if you truly love the person, I say move away and don't tell anyone you are cousins. And if it is wrong, you will be judged by the "person" who is supposed to judge you.
Good Luck!
2006-08-24 12:12:00 · answer #7 · answered by amb6487 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't help falling in love with people.Other people have chosen to fall in love with people that are far worse than your first cousin, wife beaters , child molesters and so on.
What you can help is what you do about it. That is your choice.
If if something bad comes of this it's because you made the wrong choice.
So, cherish her, value her friendship and what a special place she occupies in your life and keep your hands off her.
2006-08-17 06:18:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
So,then you got fall in love with her.Actually if you want the correct answer,then ask your heart and follow your sense
what to do because the correct answer is within your heart.
To make sure that you make a good decision,share your problem with your parent or take a counseling course.
2006-08-24 16:41:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Based on your very poor syntax, I must assume you have the most rudimentary education, therefore your exposure to more varieties of women has very likely suffered.
A) She's a close relative
B) She likes other women
C) Get over it! Elevate yourself so that other women will be interested in you.
Peace.
2006-08-24 16:30:39 · answer #10 · answered by funigyrl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋