Does anyone have any tips as to how I can get it back again. I'm worried my partner feels rejected and don't want to keep disappointing him
2006-08-16 21:40:51 · 13 answers · asked by Louise B 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
For some, yes. No tips, though, sorry! Might want to talk to your doctor about this!
2006-08-16 21:45:22 · answer #1 · answered by Katia 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your partner feels rejected precisely because you are rejecting him. You have "totally gone off sex" which is not fair to him, even though pregnancy does sometimes bring a decrease in libido.
Unless a woman is in a high-risk pregnancy and has been advised by the doctor not to have intercourse, then it is not right for her to establish a total boycott for the 9 months. There needs to be give and take from both man and woman. Him understanding that she is different right now and sex may not be as enjoyable, and her understanding that his needs do not disappear during pregnancy (in fact some men become even more amorous as they see the woman they love carrying their baby).
Obviously, drugs or medication at this time would not be ideal or healthy, so you can try other measures to encourage intimacy. Spend time with just the two of you - watch a romantic move - or go on a date. Even if you do not feel like having sex, you should initiate it at least every once in a while and also accept your husband's advances every once in a while (unless you really are not feeling well or having pregnancy aches and pains at the time).
You will find that you will feel better afterwards simply because of the intimacy factor and knowing your husband is satisfied. And of course, sex can be good for us gals, too! Different during pregnancy, yes, but still good.
Oh and be sure to explain why sometimes it's really hard to want to have sex - and make sure he knows it's the pregnancy and not him. But please don't reject him anymore. Men have needs just like women do. Be sensitive to each other.
2006-08-16 21:55:01 · answer #2 · answered by Veritas 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is absolutly normal! You have a lot going on with your body and hormones. I just had my son 4 months ago so I remember all of this too well. My husband and I have been together for 11 years and have akways had a fantastic sex life...... except when I have been pregnant and nursing. Your body naturally gets 'turned on' like any other animal because we were made to 'mate'. When you become pregnant and are nursing these hormones in your body feel that they have done their job, you are with child. Once you stop nursing, if you are breast feeding the hormones will come back. Just a helpful hint because these hormones are not working if you do make love you will be dry use a lubricant like ky mist it really helps. your husband should understand, mine did. Besides the physical aspect emotionally you are exhausted and probably feel huge. Just try to be intimate every once in a while for his sake an fake it, we have been doing it for generations, it'll keep him happy and you wn't feel guilty. It might even help you go into labor twords the end they have a natural stimulant in their sperm that moves things along. With both my kids I went into labor the sae day that I had sex! Good luck
2006-08-16 22:22:13 · answer #3 · answered by rye252000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's totally normal for your libido to change. Mine did like yours and pretty much hit rock bottom. (My boyfriends sisters skyrocketed, and I never have thought that was quite fair.) I know it made my boyfriend feel badly, but as my belly got bigger he stopped wanting it so much too. We tried to do things other than sex (which I won't list out here, cause I don't wanna get reported!), and we bought some KY gel for when we did have sex, and that made it a little better.
What paxicotrader said, that it isn't fair to him, is true, but what her advice is isn't quite fair to the pregnant lady, either. You can't 'make' yourself let him have sex with you, or you'll start to resent him, and that will lead to a steeper decrease in libido. She's probably not been in this situation before. I did try that for a bit, and it made me loose the little interest I had in sex left at all, because it wasn't enjoyable to do that when it feels like a chore.
2006-08-17 02:41:23 · answer #4 · answered by Queen Queso 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the first things I notice when I'm pregnant....sometimes even before the positive test....is that my sex drive drops. It'll be gradual in the beginning, and by the end of pregnancy, it's one of the furthest things from my mind. I don't know why that is, except that I have several friends who feel the same way. Your body is just going through so much, along with your mind.
Take the time to let him know how you feel, and make sure he knows that you are still attracted to him. And if there's anything he can do to stimulate you then let him know; I'm sure he'd be more than willing to oblige. In the meantime, try thinking about sex more. Let yourself have sexy daydreams, and if you get the itch even get yourself worked up, even if your man isn't around. The more you think about sex, the more you'll want to do it.
2006-08-16 22:21:14 · answer #5 · answered by Cy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With my first pregnancy, he is now 4 years old, I had no intrest in sex after 32 weeks, My back hurt, my hips hurt, my pelvic bone hurt, I was tired from no sleeping at night, from peeing all night long, MY husband understood completely, If you partner loves you he would understand, Now I have 3 children, I wish you the best of luck. and congrads on the new baby.
2006-08-17 03:00:35 · answer #6 · answered by crazy2have3kids 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have your doctor,you , and your partner sit down and discuss the changes you are and will be going through. Open and honest discussion will help both of you and your partner to better understand things.
2006-08-16 21:49:19 · answer #7 · answered by Mark 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Many things get lost during pregnancy which is why you should always try a string around your finger to remember where you left things.
2006-08-16 21:46:26 · answer #8 · answered by Colorado 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes for some, don't worry it will come back and as for you partner just be honest with him, it will be something he will have to get use to anyway when the baby is born.
If you have any doubts see your doctor
2006-08-16 21:50:01 · answer #9 · answered by elvenlike13 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
completely normal.
some lose while others cant get enough of it.
unfortunatly i have no advice.
congrats
2006-08-17 02:08:39 · answer #10 · answered by Sufer Baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋