I am a single twenty something girl and i live with a twenty something gay couple. They like to recruit people off the internet to have 3 somes with and they bring them to our house. I do not feel comfortable having strangers in my house like that especially if im not there... we all pay equal rent. Is it my right to tell them I do not want them bringing strangers into our house?
2006-08-16 19:51:45 · 19 answers · asked by pinksparklyturtle 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
We have all signed a lease for a year and it has been six months. I tried to have the talk with him and he told me i need to be more trusting. I works days and nights and they try to strategically plan it so it goes on while im at work...
2006-08-16 20:10:24 · update #1
It is totally understandable that you are uncomfortable with having strangers in your home. It sounds like they are strangers to your room mates as well.
Have you tried discussing with them that you are uncomfortable? Why not suggest they hire a hotel room for these encounters..... it would be a safer for them as well. But I don't see any of this happening to be honest. You know them better then anyone else here..... how well do you think they will take you suggesting they take their sex party elsewhere?
I would find a new living arrangement, the one you are in is not safe. There are a great deal of lunatics in this world.... I wouldn't want my room mates endangering my safety and theirs by parading a bunch of strangers through my home. Move out.... I bet your not the first one to bail on living with them if this is how they treat all their room mates.
ANOTHER SIX MONTHS! Your room mates wont even listen to your concerns, they have no respect for your feelings. Six more months ha? Nope.... doesn't have to happen. All you have to do is find them a new room mate to take over your part of the lease. Advertise. If you feel bad about putting another person in the same situation, ( I know I would ) then make sure the person you choose is a guy. When your room mates ask who the person taking over your lease is ( perfect stranger ) or suggest they help with the picking process, just reply with "Trust Me" :)
If you don't believe that picking a new room mate is a good option, then go to your land lord with your concerns. They have to let you out of your part of the lease if you are in genuine fear for your safety. Which if I was you, I would be.
2006-08-16 20:11:32 · answer #1 · answered by Jenni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a tough one. Initial response would be, yes you are right. However you could look at it from another angle - if you met someone and took them back to the flat, they'd be a stranger too until you got to know them (if you know what i mean)
Why not try talking to the couple and just explaining that it makes you very uncomfortable. If they still continue (which i think they may) and you still don't like it then i think you may need to start looking for somewhere else to live.
How would you feel if they didn't like your friends and told you that they didn't want them in the house? It's a bit of a catch 22
2006-08-17 02:59:00 · answer #2 · answered by mrsmac_3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it is a big moral dilema. being a young girl the situation may even be dangerous for u. You must sort wayout. In my opinion the gays cannot change their attitude because they are already at moral bottom. To hope some thing better from them cannot be possible. Therefore, it is the best for u to switch-over and prefer to live with some group of girls Because every genus is valuable in its genre as per famous doctrine. Therefore, I will sugget to leave that bad society rather singly combating and creating problems for your self. They will never change and will go in to hell because they are turning nature. You seem a moral girl may God bless & betow courage to take decision.
2006-08-17 03:18:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
at the end of the day... you are just as entitled to bring people over. Why dont you invite a few people over everytime they have someone over... This means you will have tobe there, but at least they will see how you feel without you having to say anything.
But ideally... You should move somewhere else where you can preserve your sanity and not have to wonder what might have caused that stain on the couch.
2006-08-17 02:59:08 · answer #4 · answered by MOZ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, please tell them. Don't be confrontational about it, as that could cause a lot of animosity, but definitely let them know that you're not comfortable with them bringing strangers into the house and try to be open to compromise (for example, them only inviting people you already know over, going to hotels, or only having "company" when you're home).
2006-08-17 02:58:04 · answer #5 · answered by Not Allie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them whats up but try and be as wise and loving about it. If they dont want to listen there isnt alot you can do but sigh and know they love you and move on with your life. You also probably wana make sure you understand as best you can why your not ok with what they are doing before you go into the conversation.
2006-08-17 03:02:27 · answer #6 · answered by magpiesmn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well that's really a big problem.try to talk to them in good ways after all u pay rent too u have the right to say no and opposed to their wrong doings.If they will not listen to you start to look a new mate or leave that house...than Bear every things and will result into fighting,and misunderstanding.
2006-08-17 02:58:11 · answer #7 · answered by effy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, of course, just don't do it when they bring the person over. Sit them down together and ask that they go to the other person's house or to a hotel.
2006-08-17 02:57:38 · answer #8 · answered by vampire_kitti 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are a tenant in the house, just find yourself a new house and move out. If they are tenants in your house, then find some good reason and give them notice to move out. Your safety is being threatened. Get the support of your parents, siblings or relatives in this.
2006-08-17 03:00:24 · answer #9 · answered by yuvan53 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say if it makes you uncomfortable you might have to leave
But lay down some boundries. like...you don't want to see it happening or hear it happening. Likewise for you if you have a visitor.
Well also strangers can be very dangerous.I wouldl think of moving if I were you.
good luck
2006-08-17 02:58:50 · answer #10 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋