Did you have a "bad" marriage at one point that you and your spouse were able to make better?

Answer 1

Yup...very bad. I was foolish enough to believe I lived in a fairytale and put my husband up on a pedastal. I excused his violent outbursts, his constant yelling, and he pretty much did whatever the heck he wanted. Then he cheated, had an affair actually...and here's the kicker..she was threatening to tell, so he knocked me up on purpose as he figured I wouldn't leave because of the value I placed on family. I now have an 8yr old reminder of how bad things can get.

Then it got better.....ten times better than I ever thought it would or could be. We went through some serious counseling, communication therapy and he took anger management (a few times). In the end, it's been almost 18 years. I'm glad I stuck it out. I am now thankful the affair opened my eyes to reality, and I have no regrets. Oh, and I do also have a great husband...it took alot of work, I saw the capability in him and found it. For the last 7-8 yrs, we've been the best of friends and I couldn't be happier.

Answer 2

I can't say it was bad, but it wasn't good either. I got pregnant with our first child when my husand and I had been dating for about 6 months. He didn't want it, wanted me to have an abortion (completely just "didn't have a clue" on his part; he was basing his choice on the fact that his sister had had one and seemed just fine with it), but I wanted the baby, no way was I having an abortion and I knew I could never give it up. So I gave him the option of walking away, no hard feelings (and I meant it, considering I took the choice out of his hands), he chose to stay. I went to live with my mother until the baby was 5 months old when he decided he couldn't stand us being so far away anymore and came and got us.

We got married when the baby was just a couple weeks over a year old, in the county courthouse, and his proposal was--I kid you not--"You know, we get free housing if we get married". Romantic, eh? It wasn't ever the wedding that bothered me; just the proposal. The first four years were extremely hard. The first year we were living together, he was finishing up his last year of school, while I stayed home with the baby (it was cheaper that way; as long as neither one of us worked, we got a full ride--minus tuition--until he graduated, which we desperately needed). We had very little of a relationship, barely talked, barely had sex, no physical affection. I couldn't have told you back then whether my husband loved me or not, because he never said it. He acted like he could barely stand me. We lived like roommates.

But then when my son was four, something changed. To this day I still don't know what. But I finally got a job (long story, but he job-hopped for a few years before he landed a good, stable one) and we decided to have another child. Things have gotten progressively better since. He still keeps his emotional distance from me, and he still likes to spend a bit too much time alone, likes his freedom a bit too much for a married guy (he tends to take it to extremes, where sometimes it seems like he simply doesn't ever have time for us), but I know he loves now, and he'd do anything for me. The sex is better, we get along better. Just this last year I can honestly say I think we've been falling in love all over again. Slowly but surely I'm seeing the man I fell in love with again.

It's not there yet, it's not a fairy tale. But I love him, and I love our boys.

Answer 3

At one point in our marriage, I was resigned to live out the rest of my life in misery, because I wasn't getting a divorce. It was that bad. We didn't communicate, or really do things together.
I prayed for him everyday, because he also didn't come to church with the kids and me. After about a year, he got saved and since then, he's become a wonderful husband! Actually, I'm sure it was always inside him, he just needed Jesus to bring it out.

Answer 4

Our first four years were awful. There were threats of divorce every day. The only way we were able to hang onto our marriage was by going to church and having a personal relationship with Jesus. We are now on our seventh year and we are doing wonderful. 3 children and number four on it's way. We are so happy. Good luck to you and God bless

Answer 5

I kept trying to make it work. I found out that I couldn't make it work on my own. I gave up. He left. I can breathe easier. You know what? God saw me through every step of the way. God is still watching over me. I am so grateful for that. There is no telling where I am headed next. Did you get all that?

Answer 6

Not really. My husband and I were best friends for 4 yrs before getting married.

Answer 7

Depends on the situation;if it's abuse, it will never work; but if it something forgivable, with alot of teamwork and effort, anythig is possible, jus make sure it's what you both want!

Answer 8

bad marriage, not able to make better.

Answer 9

Less bad, but we fixed things up enough

Answer 10

Yeah, the idiot left and I've been fine ever since...