My neighbors just had a baby. I told my husband that I see her mom over there a lot helping out with the baby. He said, "That's wierd". I told him that when a woman has a baby it's not unusual at all to have her mom (or someone close) over a lot to help for a couple weeks. Am I correct, or is it "weird" as my husband seems to think?? BTW, we don't have kids so we don't really know!
2006-08-16 13:45:00 · 27 answers · asked by animal_mother 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
That is VERY normal...typically couples get some kind of help, otherwise, you would lose your mind...the first few weeks are almost impossible to get through - you are recovering from labor ( I couldnt even walk the first week postpardum) plus you are up all day and night with a screaming baby - you need someone else to help out and takes shifts so the mom can get some rest...also, it is impossible to do household chores, cook, run errands, etc...because the baby is not allowed to leave the house because of germs and the hubby usually has to work, not to mention how do you hold a sleeping baby in one arm and cook with the other? it just doesnt happen...so most women need a hand and usually the person most likely to help is their mother or mother in law.
2006-08-16 13:59:02 · answer #1 · answered by dixiechic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never had anyone to help with my babies. I could not stand my mom in my house that long. All three of my babies, it has been just me, with DH going back to work the day after I came home from the hospital. I personally wouldn't have it any other way. Maybe I'm selfish but my baby is my baby and I don't want anyone but me handling the care- even when I'm run ragged, I'd rather have one more of my own threads pulled than have someone else get near my baby.
2006-08-16 14:53:38 · answer #2 · answered by imjustasteph 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is absolutly normal. A lot of women have a Mother or sister or someone else close to them stay at their home for the first two weeks especially if it is their first child. It is very hard in the begining the simplest things like taking a shower making toast and using the bathroom become hard because a lot of the times the baby won't let you put them down.
2006-08-16 14:44:06 · answer #3 · answered by rye252000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...what is it with men and their attitudes about babies.
They don't like to be around them when they are crying or peeing or pooping, but the minute someone else steps up to the plate...they are weird!
Mom's need their Mom's help. We are not much different from wildlife in this respect. Animals group together, with the female of the species taking turns raising the young, often times for weeks at a time.
There is absolutely nothing "weird" about this other than men just don't get it.
2006-08-16 15:10:28 · answer #4 · answered by coachls 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband was the same way!! When we had our son I naturally assumed my mom would be staying with us for a couple of days, and his response was 'Why?' Turns out he felt like it was saying to him "you will be no help to me at all, so I'm calling in for backup". In reality, it's just really nice to have another mom around for moral support.
Men think they'll be helping with the baby, but what a new mom really needs is everything else taken care of so she can focus on the baby, and someone to give her a break for showers, and peace of mind;). If Honey wants to do all the dishes and laundry and cooking for you, let him (I know you don't have kids). Once they find out that's what they'll be doing, they'll glady want the mother-in-law there to help out.
2006-08-16 14:22:33 · answer #5 · answered by Margie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal for a new mom to get help from family and friends. Having a baby is a huge adjustment. Moms need time to heal after the birth.
2006-08-16 14:01:37 · answer #6 · answered by Chris 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh boy does a new mother need extra help with a new baby. You don't have time to fart! Also after about a week or so you get really down and this is the time when you need emotional as well as physical help. Also if you have a caesarian you cannot do ANY physical work for 6 weeks.
Any woman who says they don't need help is either lying or deluding themselves.
2006-08-16 14:26:30 · answer #7 · answered by cg1209 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There nothing like a new life to bring the family around especially good old mom on top of just enjoying a new life she know how tired the new mom is and the extra help around the house is much needed
2006-08-16 13:53:58 · answer #8 · answered by shannon m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whats weird is your husband's attitude on the subject. The baby's mother is very fortunate to have the help of her mother. Not just in the care of the newborn but in the overall responsibilities of the house chores. I certainly hope that his attitude has changed if the two of you are so blessed.
2006-08-16 15:01:14 · answer #9 · answered by Robere 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not weird at all. In families always someone a mother/ sis / sis-in-law or anyone does come and stay over with a new mother to help her with her daily chores and also to help her with the new baby. The usual practice vary in different communities, countries. ( they can be anywhere from 5 weeks to six months )
2006-08-16 13:54:01 · answer #10 · answered by imhm2004 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋