My daughter is 17. She's 5'6" 135 lbs. She thinks she's too fat.?

Question

We work out together twice a week and she is beautiful. How can I convince her that its not all about looks???

Answer 1

Well unfortunately we live in a society where there is all this media that influences us into believing that there is a "Perfect size". 17 is a very impressionable age. There are many things to deal with like peer pressure and so on. Keep telling your daughter how beautiful she is, but also comment on other qualities about her as a whole. What really counts is the way a person is on the inside.

Answer 2

Well, for one, she most likely gets these ideas from looking at female celebrities who are, most of the time, skinny. The world and the media then tells people that that kind of person is the staple for beautiful. Therefore, when your daughter sees herself as a 5'6", 135 lbs. female, she thinks that she is too big. Sit down and ask her where she gets the notion that she is fat. Ask her, "What do you think is just right?" Ask her to give you an example of a person she would like to look like. Then attempt to remedy this by praising your daughter, not neccessarily putting down her image of "normal". If her insecurities spawn from the media's image of "normal", explain to her that most of the time, the celebrities she is acustomed to seeing have personal trainers to help her look that way. God made different people different ways. If everyone was the exact same way, there would be no reason to make more than one human being.

Answer 3

http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/bmicalc.htm

Show her this chart. Simply fill in height, in feet and inches, then weight, and click COMPUTE BMI. This shows that her BMI, body mass index, is dead center of NORMAL. She should not be trying to lose weight.

Remember that sometimes, when people exercise a lot, they gain muscle weight and lose fat... so they look better even though they are not losing weight.

So tell her not to be discouraged if she exercises but doesn't lose weight.

As far as convincing her it's not about looks.... you might have a challenge there. At her age, surrounded by a whole bunch of other teenagers, all competing for the "best guys," nothing you say is going to convince her that she doesn't want to look her best.

Hopefully, she won't forget "pretty is as pretty does." We should encourage our teenagers to work on the inside beauty, too.

Answer 4

The way it sounds that your daughter is a very fine young lady. You shouldn't have to convince her that she is beautiful. She should be able to look in the mirror and see for her self that she not fat or anything like that

Answer 5

Boy I'm fat, if she's that weight. That's awful. The world has a point of view on your body shape, they want you to be skinny but then they criticize you for being too skinny. I think that it is really something that you just grow out of, or at least I did. I look the way I want to look and no one can stop me! :) But everybody should at least be healthy.

Answer 6

Unfortunately you can't. The movies and tv shows and magazines all spell out that stick thin is it. It is sad, but until the masses stop idolizing the <1% that is in Hollywood, magazines, etc., it won't stop. What's worse is that most kids don't realize that the images they see in print and on the screen have all been touched up and altered by computer programs.

Just reinforce that she looks fine and hopefully it will sink in.

Answer 7

Your daughter is definftly not fat. This sounds mean, but my sister is 16, and ways more than that. She may weigh more than some of her friends, but she's probably taller, or her friends have eating disorders. I think your daughter is comparing herself to the people she sees on tv, or in magazines. Talk to her, let her know that those people have to stick to strict diets, and exersise often. Ask if she wants to try THAT for the rest of her live. Encourage her to be herself, and let her know that she probaly weighs les than most people her age.

Answer 8

She isn't fat. Goal weight for a person my height5ft4 in is 145(I'm working toward that lol) . Most people have a false impression of their own image. She sounds like shes at a good weight(maybe alittle under)

Answer 9

Wow, that's not fat. I weigh about the same and i have 5'1". Then again I am an athlete and have a lot of muscle. Everyone is beautiful, shape doesn't matter.

Answer 10

Good luck man. 5' 6" is pretty nice for a girl, but at that age she probably won't listen to you. I don't know how to help with poor body image.