My dad's a sex addict?

Question

my dad's 62.he's very attracted to whores in their 20s ,takes them frequently to appartments,is on viagra 100 and other sexual meds and is currently in poor health.now that we know he's that ill and cheated on my mom repeatedly we asked him to seek therapy which he refused.what can we do to help?i'm 37 and have a 9 yr. old daughter,can he assault us sexually?i mean how does he view wife and kids now that he's a sex addict?

Answer 1

your dad is going thru men's menopause . He is chasing his dreams of his younger age. Also look into your mon's sexual habit / does she say no to him very often? How often do they have sex? Is it enough for him or too much for her? food -like meat have capability to enchance sex drive . would your dad change to a vegetarian. budda monks has little sex drive. therapy is good if he admit that it is a problem. and he will go for the treatment by himself.

Answer 2

Sex is natural. Unfortunately so is cheating. It's nature's way of 'sowing your oats' or 'spreading your seed' if you are a guy. That is not to say that it isn't morally wrong.

'Sex addict' is a recent terminology. The idea behind it is that if any behaviour interferes with your normal functioning (eg if you are so 'addicted' to sex that you call off of work to meet with hookers) then it is an 'addiction'. There is even 'internet addiction'.

Usually there are deeper problems as the roots of these types of addictions.

If your father has not assaulted you or your child in the past he is not going to start 'now that he's a sex addict'. You would have more to worry about your own safetey if he was a drug addict.

Answer 3

Ok you've gone from talking about a sex addict to wondering if he's a pedophile, etc. Being a sex addict doesn't mean that he's going to rape anyone...especially his family members. I'm assuming your parents are still together? If so, then they need to work it out by seeking professional help. It's not really your place to get involved in your parents sex life. If they aren't together, let him do his thing. It sounds as though because of his health, he may not have very much more time on this earth. Maybe he wants to spend his final days having sex with as many women as possible. Maybe his past sexual experiences haven't been that great and now he would like to experience what he has been missing out on. Who knows. Either way...it's not really your place to worry about it. He's a grown man. And unless he has done something inappropriate to you or your daughter, I would stay out of it. Good Luck!

Answer 4

he is just a man who like sex. at 62 and in poor health what else does he have to look forward too. i can't answer your question about him assaulting you but i would think if he never did when you were growing up then there is a good chance he want now but i can't be for sure. i don't think i would let him baby sit because of the decisions he makes. it is bad he cheated on your mom all those years but that doesn't mean he is some kind of freak. it sounds like you are just plain bitter toward him. if i were you just stay away from him if he is that bad. i'm not at all critical of you, your thoughts, and how you feel. just don't get involved with him at any level!

Answer 5

He may be your dad but he's a "man" first Mandy! Sounds like your Mom has a problem in the bedroom! That's for them to handle and you to stay out of unless of course he does try something with you or your daughter! Whether it's the sex or love that he's missing he's going somewhere other than home to find it! If your mom knows what's going on and is "allowing" it to happen then he's sure not going to stop , is he? This is a "personal" problem between them and they have to work it out! I don't think he's a sex addict at all, I think he's a lonely 62 yr old male that still enjoys sex,{yeah!} and isn't finding it at "home" so he's going elsewhere, and if he's not in the best of health maybe he 's "living" it up before before he pass on! If you have concerns for you and your daughter stay away from him if you feel uncorfortable! If he misses you he'll ask why you're not around him and then you should talk to him and tell him how you feel, that you don't like his cheating on your mom and "whoring" around! Let him know that you're uncomfortable being around him and don't like your daughter around him. It's up to your Mom to do something Mandy not you!

Answer 6

No, If he has never assulted you sexually before, he isn't going to start now, with you or you 9yr old. He is into young in there 20's whores because he likes the physical appearance of them.... And he has probably always been a sex addict, but at a certain age women don't care about sex the way they once did, and since he is taking viagra, it wouldn't surprise me if your mom won't let him near her, and at his age........ paying for it from a young woman is his best bet, because there are not that many young women such as myself who will be with a man that is that old........ unless I am that old too and he is my husband..... that is the only way..... I am sorry you are just finding all of this out and I am sure he is feeling even sorrier for it........ but I don't see you in any harm as far as sexual insults from your dad that has never done anything like that before. Unless he has become c-nial... and then there is a posibility. Blessed be.....

Answer 7

I wouldn't be concerned about him assaulting you or your daughter if he's never shown any inclination in the past. I also don't think that you can help him as you tried to get him into therapy and he refused. He's going to do what he's going to do and you'll have to accept that. It's too bad but he's found a new "toy" and he's going to enjoy that as long as he can. Good Luck.

Answer 8

12-Step Programs
Twelve-step programs, such as Sexaholics Anonymous, apply principles similar to those used in other addiction programs, such as Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous. However, unlike AA, where the goal is complete abstinence from all alcohol, SA pursues abstinence only from compulsive, destructive sexual behavior. By admitting powerlessness over their addictions, seeking the help of God or a higher power, following the required steps, seeking a sponsor and regularly attending meetings, many addicts have been able to regain intimacy in their personal relationships.
Like other types of addicts, some sexual addicts may never be "cured." Sexual addicts achieve a state of recovery, but maintaining that recovery can be a lifelong, day-by-day process. The Twelve Step treatment approach teaches addicts to take their recovery "one day at a time" - concentrating on the present, not the future.

Medication
Recent research suggests that certain psychiatric medications --namely antidepressants -- may be useful in treating sexual addiction. In addition to treating mood symptoms common among sex addicts, these medications may have some benefit in reducing sexual obsessions.

Answer 9

Your dad is normal. Don't worry he won't hurt you. All guys like to get some and maybe from younger women as they get older. Just tell him to use protection.

Answer 10

sounds like your dad has always been a sex addict but was able to keep a controled aura in his life.
If he did not sexually assualt you then chances are he will not assualt your daughter but you are right to be careful.
If he refused treatment there is not much you can do unless he is breaking a law and then you can take measures to step in.
My advice woudl be to stay distanced from him so you and your daughter do not ahve to see the self destructive behavour he is determined to exhibit.
I am not saying kick him totally out of your life but you do need to make it clear you will not tolerate his behavour around your daughter. Call him before you visit and maybe after some time he will make the effort and you and your daughter can see your dad return to his " normal " self again.

GOOD LUCK.