What to tell my kids?

Question

I live in a gay and lesbian community even though my husband and I are straight.
We were passing a restraunt when my 4 and 6 year old kids saw two men kiss-then one of them gave the other a slap on the butt. I'm okay with this because I've always lived in this area but when my kids asked about it I told them that they were boyfriends and that it was normal (I support this in every way and yes I'm a Christian.)I explained it was the same thing with 2 women. What else should they know?

I'm sorry for the few of you who are ignorant and whose parents never taught you to love and accept people for who they are and not to judge them by their sexual preference.
My mom and dad taught me the right way, to love all, because they truly love me.

Answer 1

You are really an amazing woman. I know a lot of people have said that already, but I just had to add my glee.

I myself plan to have children whether I'm with a woman or man (I'm bi). I already have my lecture on homosexuality all planned out.

"Sometimes boys like boys and girls like girls. That's normal. Sometimes people like both boys and girls and that's normal too. And sometimes people feel that they should've been a boy when they were born a girl or the other way around. Wouldn't you feel weird if you were born the a (opposite gender of the kid)? That's what they feel. And that's fine too. They just need extra help from doctors to be the right person."

Answer 2

First of all, I'm really glad that your not a judgemental person, & I applaud you for having an open mind & for sticking to your beliefs! I fully support GLBT also. Anyway, I wouldn't rush into telling your kids anything just yet. They're still pretty young. When they're about 12 or 13, I would start telling them. But it's your decision. When you do tell them though, tell them that it's not about who you love, but that you love. That's my motto. Good Luck!!!!!

Answer 3

You are a very inspirational woman and clearly an excellent example of openmindedness and tolerance and acceptance that this world is in such desperate need off. Congratulations on teaching your children that diversity exists and because others are different from you, they are still people. Good job and you're a wonderful mother!

Answer 4

Wow, I just wanna say "yay" on you coz you're very honest with your children. Some (or maybe most) parents wouldn't do that and I do admire the way you handled it. I don't really have an answer but I guess being honest with your kids when they ask questions about sensitive topics like this is the best way to go. Godspeed and thanks for sharing that. ;o)

Answer 5

I think you did well. I think you can wait a until they're a bit older for that. Whrn I was about that age I asked the same thing when I saw two women kissing, and my mother just said it wasn't supposed to happen and it just hurt me later in life so honesty is best just in tiny bits

Answer 6

I usually tell my kids when something is "different" about someone is that God makes all kinds of people and He loves us all the same. I wouldn't go into many details at this age because growing up in that area they will get used to seeing this. I admire you for your tolerance and acceptance. I wish it was this easy in my own area!

Answer 7

I have a friend at church who has a gay father, and two small children. He has taught his kids that boys like girls and girls like boys, except that sometimes girls like girls and boys like boys. They say, oh, you mean like Grandpa Bill and Grandpa Jack? (names changed) and he says, yes, like that.

You tell your kids what they need to know to answer their questions. When they get ready to ask you if the two men sleep in the same bed, or if they can have a baby, or whatever, tell them what they need to know. Don't go into big explanations that they aren't ready to hear.

Kids want to be open and loving, if you let them.

Thanks for asking and for being a supportive Christian mom!

Answer 8

Congrats

Answer 9

WOW - could you give some classes to other parents? I have the funniest story about a friend of mine who was going through the same thing.

She came over to visit me and my husband of 16 years - she brought her 4 year old for the first time to our house. The adults were all at the table talking, the young girl on the floor beside me playing with my puppy. As most 4 year olds do she had a million questions - at one point she asked "Where does she sleep?" referring to the dog. I said, "With us." and then realized that might not be appropriate so I said, "I mean with me" - boy that 4 year old mind caught on quickly and she looked up at me and said, "Do you two sleep together?" and I said "No" well her Mom had begun listening to us and she caught my eye and smiled and said "It's okay." She leaned down to the girl and said, "Remember how I told you that some boys love other boys? Well, Tab and Joe love each other just like Mommy and Daddy". The little girl looked up at me and said, "Do you 2 sleep together?" and I said "Yes" so she says "Let me see your bedroom" so I took her to our bedroom and showed her. She looked at it and said "Oh this is pretty." Then she got the biggest scowl on her face and looked right at me and said "But you lied to me"

Answer 10

That sounds right. "They love each other like Daddy and I do." That seems really age-appropriate. It's what my neighbors told their kids when I moved into She Who Would Become My Wife's house.

They'll have more questions--just answer honestly and briefly, as they ask, and there will be little danger of TMI.