When should a wife expect her husband to stop partying on the weekends? Is there an age?

Question

or do you think when you have kids the party stops?

We've been married for 14 years, I'm 37, he's 48, we have two kids, 13, and 10. He likes to go a his guy friend's homes and drink, watch a ball game, and then drive home. But lately he's been doing this every, or every other weekend. Sometimes I wake up at 3am Saturday morning and he's not home, after he went to bed with me... and or... one of his friends is camped out on our couch in the a.m.
I think he's having a mid-life crisis.... i just can't get him to stop. I've even tried to "put him out"... but he just comes back.

Answer 1

if he's going out with u it's fine, if not he should have been stopped.

Answer 2

Some men quit early, some men quit when they die... Depends a lot on how heavy the partying actually is??? What actually is the kind of partying involved??? Having children does not make the party stop, and the added stress may actually increase the need to seek relief... Sorry, there is no difinitive answer for that question... Maybe a good heart-to-heart will help, in a non-accusatory kind of way... Good Luck

Answer 3

He should stop when your married!!!! If you two go to a party together its one thing, or even an office party, but to just go partying on weekends once your married is unacceptable. And he should especially stop once you have kids. People party for one of two reasons, to find a date, or to just go out as a single person, and once your married, both of them end. Its time to put your foot down , because other wise you will be signing the Divorce papers.

Answer 4

The bad thing is your husband was probably doing this before you were married and you were ok with it. I mean you still married him. And now you want him to change? I don't agree with the partying on the weekends but you can't expect to change him because you are now married. You should have looked for a guy that didn't party. He would have been the type of husband you wanted.

Good luck!

Answer 5

There's nothing wrong with partying on the weekends. Is it Fri, Sat, Sunday night? I'm married and so are all of my friends, we get together to watch fights, football, basketball, go to bars, and most of our wives are friends. If he's hanging out and going to clubs every weekend you might have a problem, but even so once you have kids the clubbing should slow to a crawl. Does he invite you when he goes?

Answer 6

With out you, every weekend? I don't think so.. If, He dose. You and him need to take turns.. You do things you like. One week. The next weekend, is his turn.. If, he dosn't like that.. You both, stay home. Or do something together.Take turns baby sitting. It's going to get old for you, If you don't get out some.. That's, why most people get married.. For the conpanionship. You sound like. Your alone most weekends.. That not right. Good luck.

Answer 7

A good friend's wife tried this after complaining a million times: LET HIM GO!! After partying for about 4 months, the poor sap gave up. He found there was no thrill of the "hunt" anymore.

Answer 8

You've made a big mistake that most women make. You married a party boy, you stay w/a party boy till he's done. Kids might help, but don't get your hopes up.
I suggest you tell him and you start drawing some limits and he has to work w/you on that.

Answer 9

when you are married and have kids. Then the only parties should be birthdays and holidays or the occasional BBQ. Life don't stop when you have a family but the heavy partying should.

Answer 10

I would say not until he decides to grow up and become a man.
Then he will realise his responsibilities as a husband and family man are much greater than those of the boy he once was.

Answer 11

Uh yea, if he's partying and kids are present then it's time to tell him to go to an AA meeting.

Here is a chapter of a book that might help..

http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_BigBook_chapt8.pdf