Me and my husband had gotten in to a argument over socks and not washing them correctly. He said that they were too small. and a conversation turned in to the worst fight we have ever had and now three days later he wont talk to me. For two night's he has slept on the couch. what to do
2006-08-16 06:42:48 · 18 answers · asked by Amanda R 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
give him some space. my husband gets like that sometimes and he comes around when he is ready or needs something. be patient and let me know how it ends up.
2006-08-16 06:48:25 · answer #1 · answered by ms01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Clearly, some things were said that were very hurtful -- by both of you I'm sure.
Here's my suggestion. Make an inventory of the behavior and the words that you are ashamed of. When you see him, apologize for those things. Mention them specifically so that he knows what you are apologizing for.
With any luck, he'll apologize for his words and behavior. If he doesn't, give him a little time. After a day, tell him very gently, that your feeling were hurt too. Don't ask for an apology, it needs to come from him willingly.
One you have the decks clear of this particular fight, start talking. Figure out the real reason that you fought. I think we all know it wasn't about socks. Fights like this happen when one or both parties feels un-valued, un-appreciated, and disrespected. Work on those issues. Some of the articles at the link below apply to your situtation. "Communicating with Emotional Integrity" is an excellent article.
You may want to see a marriage counselor to help you learn how to argue. Fights like this one can break a marriage if they happen too often.
In the meantime, try to remember why you married him in the first place. Then, remind him why you married him. Date him again. Seduce him again. Court him again. Talk to him. Plan the future together. Do some things that will make you both laugh.
Good luck to you. Live long and prosper -- together.
2006-08-16 07:05:32 · answer #2 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So it started over socks but escalated into everything else that was wrong. Regarding the socks .... THEY'RE JUST SOCKS !!! Wash them in colder water next time and dry on lower heat to avoid shrinkage. Regarding the other issues, perhaps you need to pour out your heart either on paper or on E-mail, kind of like you did with this question. From the tone of this it seems like you're a young couple, not married that long, and are going to face much tougher situations than this one. If you've been married a while, then find some way to communicate and see if you can get to the bottom of what the REAL problem is here.
2006-08-16 06:52:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is something else bothering him. It's not about the socks, that is just what set him off. Go out and buy him as many socks as you can and ask him if that will take care of the problem. Tell him you tried to find a class you could take on the proper way to wash a sock but couldn't. Things like that will bring him around.
2006-08-16 06:54:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is that the only thing going on? It's up to you. The fight was for a very silly and unreasonable issue. Of course, don't mess up someone's wardrobe! Is he a stubborn person? If he is, don't expect him to talk first. The longer you wait, the worst the feelings will get. You should tackle this right away with humility, and sincerety. You guys possibly have other underlying issues that need immediate attention. Is there any unusual stress at home? How's your relationship's wellness overall? You need to get to the root of the problem. If there is real love in your relationship, and true friendship, you should be able to work it out. If there are unresolved issues, you might need to seek professional help to mediate your communication for a little while.
2006-08-16 07:34:21 · answer #5 · answered by ControVerse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a bigger problem then the socks. This is the weirdest thing...mine and my hubby's biggest fight to date started over laundry as well...lol. I know that it is no laughing matter to you though. Find out what the bigger picture is...its more then what started the fight....trust me on this one...did deeper. Apologize for anything ugly or mean you might've said and try to open him up. I'm not saying to take all of the blame, just whatever blame goes to you. That might get the ball rolling..........I like honest's answer above...but make sure you do it all jokingly and not bitter...humor can get the ball rolling for sure!
2006-08-16 07:01:29 · answer #6 · answered by mcnees79 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been with my husband for 4 years and married for 2. We have fights over the stupidest things all the time. But eventually one of us tells the other we are sorry. Usually him but sometimes I step up even if I know i'm right(which is always, haha), and I go to him. Just go home and when he's laying on the couch just go over and give him a great big hug and don't let him push you off. That always works for me.
2006-08-16 06:49:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Over socks! You've got to pick your fights right girl! Some things you've got to let slide......Although when he makes thoughtless remarks like that ...in this case....simply ask if he'd prefer to do the laundry for awhile if he thinks he can do better!
Buy him a bag of new sock! And maybe a comfy pair of slippers, and talk over about how BOTH of you should try not to go overboard on the 'little things"!
2006-08-16 07:09:54 · answer #8 · answered by Ronique 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with some of the other answers it seems there is a bigger problem then socks. Just talk to him and be honest. Ask him what is really bothering him. Be understanding and let him know you care and sincerely want to make things right between you.
2006-08-16 07:05:32 · answer #9 · answered by Len 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well let him cool off for a bit.I just dont understand how arguing over socks caused this big fight.I think something else is bothering him.Give it a few days and then try to talk to him.
2006-08-16 14:42:31 · answer #10 · answered by nanny2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I can't imagine actually arguing over socks. Apologize sincerely to him and end this craziness. What a trivial thing to fight over.
2006-08-16 06:51:26 · answer #11 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋