My husband and I...?

Question

.......would like to make sure that his crack-pot family DOES NOT get custody of our daughter if we should die for some reason or another. We are going out of town for 2 weeks and thought this would be a good time to get some legal documents together that guarantee that my parents will get her.

Does anyone know of a good website that we could print up a blank form fill it out and have it filed on our own. Also, will writing a letter that states our wishes and having it notarized suffice? Would a notarized letter be something his family could contest?

Thanks you all of your advice so far.
You are absolutely right, we should go to a lawyer and have been planning to... We don't think his family would contest our decision but you never know with them... I'm asking about a notarize letter or "quick" online document because we are leaving in a week and having a will drawn by a lawyer is going to take too long. We are gonna have our wills drawn after we get back when there is more time. We have been putting it off and now when we may actually need a will or similar documentation our procrastination is biting us in the a**! Trust me when I say that I realize how this could go wrong and that we should have been more on the ball with this.
We just want our daughter to be safe and loved if ever something happens to us, we are trying to do the right thing.

To everyone who answered thank you...

I found a program at office depot that will do what I need. The forms are ready-made, we just have to fill in the blanks, have it notarized and filed. This will work until we get back and get it done properly.

Answer 1

This issue is determined by state law. Based upon New York law, a will is the best way to accomplish this. It would be up to the judge to decide what credence to give to a notarized letter. The distinction is that a will requires a higher standard to execute: it must be "published" (means state that this is your last will and testament) before two witnesses who then sign.
Both you and your spouse should execute separate wills, amongst other things, appointing your parents as guardians of your daughter. It is also important that you make your parents the trustees of a trust that will be created from your assets for the benefit of your daughter if she is underage (18, 21 or whatever age you would want her to get the assets). If you fail to do this, it is possible that your parents could get your daughter, but his family could get control of the assets. Not a good situation.
Also appoint alternative guardians and trustees should your parents predecease you.
If you do not have time to do it right, a letter form may work. But find out how many witnesses are necessary for a will in your state and then not only have it notarized, but have it witnessed by the required number of witnesses.
Good luck and remember, absent a directive from you, courts in these situations will attempt to act in the "best interests of the child".

Answer 2

~A notarized letter will not protect your child if you die. The only thing that the surrogate's court will accept is a witnessed and notarized will. If you are truly concerned about who will raise your daughter if you die, spend the money to have a lawyer draw up an air tight will to protect her as well as assets you may have that you don't even realize you have. There is a reason lawyers go to law school to learn this stuff.

Answer 3

I don't think a notorized letter is enough for permenant custody. It may work for a short time while the judge decides where the child will go, but if his family contests it, then it might not stand up. I would talk to a family lawyer, one who deals with child protection and placement. If nothing is drawn up at all, then the judge will determine which place is best for her well being. If there has ever been any family disputes or troubles with the law...then they probably wouldn't get her.

Answer 4

How important is this issue to you? If it is veeerrrry important then I wouldn't go on the cheap hoping that it will later work out in the courts. Seek out an attorney, tell him that you wish to assign Godparents for your children, & that you are concerned that your family may contest the assignment, & you want to be sure that your wishes will be enforced by the courts if necessary. Please don't trust your childs future to something you can pull in off of the internet.

Answer 5

A will would be the best type of documment to establish your wishes. I think , however, in the event that you are both killed then it is really up to a judge to determine where your child will be placed. Your will or possibly a signed notorized letter would be highly effective in helping make the right decision.

Answer 6

You can go to www.legalzoom.com & write a will in about 3 mins. - have it notarized & it will hold in court unless you leave children to unfit people. I am sure you want what is best, so that is not a problem.

Answer 7

The notarized letter stating your wishes should be enough, and should hold up in court. Just make sure you put full names of you, your husband and your child in it.

Answer 8

I have enclosed the link that will be able to get you the forms you are looking for and I believe then you have to get it signed and notarized I would get more then one copy and give one to your parents and keep one for yourself.

Answer 9

I am not 100% sure of the US laws but over here that probably wouldn't stand up in court. Are there any places over in the US you can get free/cheap legal advice?

Answer 10

Go to a lawyer and write a will!! You can make all manner of specific requests - and it's cheap!