im so confused?!!!!?

Question

I have been married to my husband for almost 7 years now.Throughout our whole relationship he has been messed.He has cheated on me a couple times.When i found out about it naturally i had my questions.He always replied with "i dont wanna talk about it".So i was pretty much forced to drop it.Well ever since all that happenedi have lost alot of trust in him.I thought i would be able to forget but its been 4 years and stuff for ME just isnt the same.I do ***** at him alot cause i really seriously cant trust anything he says.I have been like this for a year now.all of a sudden i cant trust him .This is a whole new attitude for me.I dont know whats going on with me.I do stuff to make sure he isnt doing anything to me and it bothers him so so much.It always gets us into fights.Everytime i look at him i just wanna be away from him.when he is at work i always wanna send him hateful messages and then right after i do i regret it i feel so bad.I dont know whats going on with me i thought i would

forget with time.It has done nothing but make it worst.Now all my husband can tell me is "if you cant trust me thats your problem" I dont know what to do anymore.Am i wrong?

Answer 1

well, your husband cheating on you few times and now, you really woke up and notice that it not right what he did and you want him to answer your questions. but he don't want to talk about it... wow... you really lost trust in him alot and I totally agree with you for what he has done to you. and he at work and send you hatefull messages... you shouldn't be feeling bad at all and you have trusted that mean to be married and he shouldn't be doing that ever since. Now he said that if you don't trust him then that is your plm??? I think you need to leave divorce. Period and He have no feelings or care about you at all.... he cheated on you , I know he still doing it (Once cheating is too many) and I know he lied to you alot...

Never ever feel bad if you hurt his feeling who cares.... just pack up and leave and divorce and you will find other man better than he is who love, caring, trust, commucation, being there for you, stuff that you always dream to have one.

I can't believe he would just cheating and throw the marriage like that.... Look at me my wife and I married for 9 years and I will never ever once think about cheating.. no way... I rather to talk about it and solve the plm... plain and simple... but cheating is not the answer for that dumb A$$ guy.

You need seriouly divorce and move on and you would be so happy you did. again never feel bad for him for what he done to you so pain ful and far worst than this. I am sorry I blah to much but pls, take my word. not worth to stay married becasue why????? not good healthy life, he have no feelings for you at all, and send you hateful messages. and save all of them and print them and then show the judge and tell the judge that he cheating on you so much and judge will support you more.. I know judge is married and know that cheating is not the answer. smiling.

Answer 2

You have every right to feel the way that you do. I was in a similar situation (married to a cheater for 8 years) forgetting is very hard and whan they do nothing to try to earn back trust it is even harder. I have found that the saying once a cheater, always a cheater is very true. 1 of 2 things will happen with your relationship. You will get tired of feeling the way that you do and leave or the 2 of you will seek counciling and try to salvage your relationship. To me it sound like you ahve already made up your mind that you are not happy with your situation, I don't think you are sure if you want to be with him anymore. Do what is going to make you happy.

Answer 3

No, You aren't wrong. He needs to EARN your trust back. You need to sit down and talk to him about the affairs. I am sure you have questions that need to be answered and he owes those answers. He has to be understanding also about your hesitation to trust him. He needs to quit being a dink and work VERY hard to get your trust back. I feel that once a cheater always a cheater and I think you deserve a lot better. There are lots of guys out there that would never do this to someone they love.

Answer 4

You are hurt by his actions and he needs to prove to you that you can start trusting again.Go to counseling together and see what happens there.I know the feeling but he have to help you along the way.He have to step up and show you that he want the marriage just as much as you do.He have to will to change everything and make it right. I don't know if you believe in GOD or not but if you do pray that he will take away the hurt and pain. I know how you feel I pray that you all will make it through.If you love him and he love you then both of you need to do whats necessary to make it work. Good luck

Answer 5

This is a sure indicator that you are not going to be able to just forget, Your husband needs to answer your questions in order for you to be able to move forward and start healing. If he is not willing to be honest about the affairs and tell you in detail what happened and why he felt the need to stray then there really is no chance for you to save the marriage and you need to file for a divorce.

Answer 6

trust is almost impossible to regain completely, especailly after something such as infidelity, i know im going through the same thing with my wife, and i to have these feelings, we are still trying to work it out but things are very complicated.

i will probably end up taking my own advice here but, if you truly want to work it out counceling is the best thing you can do, but if its going to continue to cause fighting between you and your husband then you need to go through the paperwork. i know the thought of it sucks but at the same time its not worth you being miserable, and in turn makeing him miserable. also if he declines to go to counceling consider it over because he doesnt care to work on it, which means you are only gonna get more bitter, either way you choose i wish you the best of luck with it.

Answer 7

You should have left him the first time he cheated on you!! That is what you did wrong!! You let him get away with it and took him back, so he sees that he can walk all over you, and you won't stand up for yourself. Leave him and find someone that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated!

Answer 8

You are married to a male who isn't even considered a man. He has taken away all your self confidence. Get yourself into counseling so that you can get strong and move on. You do not deserve this treatment. Life is too short. You can find happiness.

Good luck!

Answer 9

sounds like you need to move on and create a new start for yourself.Regain your self confidence, and find someone who will treat u with the respect and show you true love. Noone wants to walk on egg shells their whole life, and if theres no communication theres no trust !

Answer 10

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