At the end of September our lease ends, and I would like to move into a 1 BR apt for myself so I can be stable with my funds. She on the other hand hasn't found a job yet and b****ed me out because I emailed her and asked her if she had any idea what she would do if she didn't get the job. She doesn't know and the apartment complex I'm at now has only one 1 BR available, and I would like to stay there. I know that renting is a cunning business and they won't hold the place forever while my roommate decides her life. Should I get the place and kind of screw her over or wait and lose out on a place to live?
2006-08-16 02:34:13 · 13 answers · asked by nlforst 3 in Business & Finance ➔ Renting & Real Estate
I know that it may feel like a cruel thing to do when you are obviously a caring person, but you need to lose this person as a roommate.
1. They are holding you back from reaching your goals. (1 bedroom apartment)
2. They are economically unsound and it doesn't sound like they are doing much or making a real effort to change their employment situation.
3. They are becoming hostile towards you in conversation. So, they probably resent you or are becoming emotionally unstable.
4. If you stay with this person it is probably going to cost you..either in financial terms or in emotional stress.
5. The emotional stress may bleed over and impact other parts of your life like your job, relationships, etc..
Sometimes, we have to look out for ourselves and our own best interests. You can still help this person by letting them know of jobs you see at shops or whatever.
2006-08-16 02:44:07 · answer #1 · answered by BAM 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think getting your own place is screwing her over at all. As long as you make things clear to her, and be totally honest your doing whats obligated of you. Remember your not her mommy. You don't have to take care of her. She decided she wanted to live like an adult when she moved out of her parents house. You are not responsible for her if she can not find a job for herself. I'm sure there is something she can do until she gets the job that she wants. I've had to take a waitress job one time while I was waiting on the job I really wanted. You just need to sit down and tell her that your lease is up, and your moving out into your own place. Nothing against her, but your ready to be on your own. Tell her she is a great wonderful friend and that this has nothing to do with your friendship at all. She may feel upset and not know what to do, but you can suggest that she go to a family member or another friend.
2006-08-16 02:51:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Getting your own place won't be "screwing her over".
She has to earn her own living. What would happen if she couldn't pay her share of the rent? Can you afford to pay the entire thing? If you can, are you willing to support her? If she doesn't get a job, that is what is going to happen. Either that or you BOTH get evicted for non-payment.
Just be straight with her and tell her that it is getting close to the wire and you need to make a decision about YOUR future. Tell her if she doesn't have employment within a week, you will have no choice but to protect yourself financially. You must tell her now though. You can't just spriing this on her at the last second.
If she is really your friend, she will understand.
2006-08-16 02:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by BoomChikkaBoom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you can get out of the lease then I would go to the other apartment it is your current apartment complex that should verify her income if they expect to receive rent
anyway, there are government agencies that can help her. Also she may have a little more motivation to get a job to right. Her misfortune is not yours
2006-08-16 03:22:46 · answer #4 · answered by Marianne 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you are moving into a 1 bedroom apartment, you do not have to tell your roommate that.
it's your roommate's responsibility to find living arrangements on her own. not your responsibility.
all you should worry about is ensuring you get your 1bedroom AND you successfully satisfy the conditions of "ending the existing lease" (because you both are on it and don't want to be held liable for your roommates negligence if the space is ruined, unpaid, etc).
2006-08-16 02:45:15 · answer #5 · answered by jason29445 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would get the 1 bedroom place. You are giving her notice. She is the one who has no job and you shouldn't have to worry about her not having money. Good luck!
2006-08-16 02:41:22 · answer #6 · answered by Samantha M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you've given her ample notice about the situation, though you might have to tell her in more direct, more blunt terms just to totally make sure she gets it. Get into the 1BR place and get away from her.
2006-08-16 02:41:54 · answer #7 · answered by B C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everyone seems to be in agreement. If you can afford to live on your own, that's usually best as you have learned. Don't miss out on the apartment you want.
2006-08-16 04:31:35 · answer #8 · answered by sahr67 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds as if it's time for you to strike out on your own. Get the 1BR and let her fend for herself. You're not screwing her over, you're just moving on.
2006-08-16 03:05:22 · answer #9 · answered by Bostonian In MO 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
move in the new room your roommate needs to grow up and take responsibility for herself
2006-08-16 02:40:33 · answer #10 · answered by nas88car300 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋