I want them to like me, but I don't want to over-step my boundaries. I'm not their mom and don't want to pretend that I am. They're only 2 1/2 twins, but I'm not sure how to approach the situation. Anyone have suggestions or tips?
2006-08-16 02:31:17 · 16 answers · asked by moonflower1980 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
THE KIDS ARE TODDLERS,YOU HAVE TO BE A TODDLER WITH THEM.SING SONGS,PLAY KIDDIE GAMES,BUY THEM A BOX OF CRAYONS AND LET THEM GO HAYWIRE,OH, BUT OF COURSE USE PAPER.HAVE FUN!GOOD LUCK TO YOU!
2006-08-16 02:38:15 · answer #1 · answered by roll tide 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bear with me Hun hear - I have children. Well the big picture is that raising Kids can be the channel that could make the world a better place. Nobody can be told who they like or love - attraction isn't a choice but all is not lost it can be influenced.
Children do need love but what they need first is understanding however small or immature they are. To get this you need to change your outlook and get rid of that pride and get down on the living room floor and just play with them on their level - get real excited when they do - it may take a little time as previous experience of you and others may have not been this way.
Children who are understood on an emotional level and feel you are there to have fun with will then open up to you and show their true colours. First show consitency with this and just be yourself while letting go and having fun with them. The rest will fall into place even if slowly. If this is the man for you then it's worth the investment as he will put much investment and respet back into you as well for being such fun.
Hope this helps
2006-08-16 02:49:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is looking for both a mother and wife so act yourself. Try doing things as what a family would do like the park, zoo, ballgame... Later on if the relationship gets more involved try to spend some alone time with the kids. If you are uncomfortable than maybe the situation is wrong and you need to end it. I am sure though that if their father loves you the kids will pick up on that and love you as well.
2006-08-16 02:40:15 · answer #3 · answered by Mark S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how long have you been with him?
does he have them all the time?
you are lucky to not be their mum it means you get to have the fun with them.
you really need to ask him what he expects from you because you will need to occasionly tell them off for their own safety etc and to stop things being ruined... they are children after all and do need some authority to have a good up bringing. but if he does all of that type of thing and doesn't want you to then just enjoy them. it will become natural how to act soon enough when you all know what each other expects. good luck.
just talk to him. let him know you want more to do with them... i'm sure he will be happy about that. a lot of people think children are a burden in a relationship so for you to be interested that has got to make him happy.
2006-08-16 02:41:07 · answer #4 · answered by ricky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children are a touchy subject but for the most part you should treat them as if they were yours until you are told otherwise. If you can, talk to his ex and see if she's comfortable with that. After all his ex is going to be a part his life until the children aren't legally children any more.
Try to get to know her and be comfortable with the idea that boyfriend will have to see her every now and again.
If that's something you can't handle then...
2006-08-16 02:44:36 · answer #5 · answered by sierrajames1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well all you can do is try to do right by them and don't try to be there mom just take care of them as you would your own kids they will grow to love you and welcome you in there lives just take care of there needs and do what you can to make sure they know your not there mother but you will do what they need done as you see fit
best of luck i have 3 step kids who love me because of the way i helped them when they needed
2006-08-16 02:38:38 · answer #6 · answered by Billie G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want them to like you just be yourself enjoy your relationship with your boyfriend and respect the fact that he has children you, to not overstep ur bounderies is to not to descipline the chidren without his promission and to always communicate with ur boyfriend and do not pretend to be anything just be your natural self and everything will come together
2006-08-18 13:36:12 · answer #7 · answered by Cat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you dont feel comfortable dont do it. find a single guy, i get approached by girls with kids alot, not that there,s anything wrong with the girl or the kids, i just dont feel like it would work.
2006-08-16 02:38:31 · answer #8 · answered by Han_dang 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just take it one day at a time.At this age its easier to befriend them than if they where alot older,you got lucky.God bless:O)
2006-08-16 02:36:24 · answer #9 · answered by melissa_froggies 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you love him?if you do you should do the same thing to them?he will be happy if you act like mom to them
2006-08-16 02:41:31 · answer #10 · answered by T-bag 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋