My husband and I were having the seven year itch, just not getting along after a good marriage up to that point. We have two kids under 6. He moved out at some point and had a four month thing with some other women. We have since made up, gone to counseling and he is back at home. We just returned from a very nice vacation with our kids. But I can't get over his affair. He thinks I have because I don't talk about it. I haven't mentioned it once outside of counseling.
My ex-fiance is going to be in the country next week. I am thinking of spending a couple of days with him. Then my husband and I will be even and I can move on, right?
2006-08-16 02:29:00 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Two wrongs do not make a right......sit down by yourself and do a soul search. You are going to have to find it within yourself to forgive and forget and you got to think if you do have an exstravaganza with your x-fiance your husband could find out and it could mess the marriage back up...before you make the step to get even think of the kids first.
2006-08-16 02:37:45 · answer #1 · answered by lildevilchild_87 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wrong. get off that cloud. if you took your husband back after the affair and went to counseling and forgave him, then it is not a tennis match. you dont do to him what he did to you and think things will be even. this is life not a game. to me, i feel like even though you are back together , you honestly have not forgiving him and is still having doubts about your marriage. whatever he did or did not do while you were separated and living apart, even though he should had been more considerate, would be categorized "separation period". you can not blame him for what he did or not, because you are probably angry of the fact that he did and you did not.
again how could you reference the separation time as an affair. it would only be considered an affair if he was living under your roof, sharing your bed and then someone else's bed also. but if he moved out, maybe this was the only place he could find a roof and still be able to maintain your home and the children welfare.
but if you decided to play fire with fire, well you knwo the saying, you are going to get burned.
plus if you are still having feelings on unturthworthly, then maybe just maybe you all should think about divorce. i know it is an ugley term but think about the children. it is not right for them to live in a house where mommy and daddy do not respect each other and there are always fights and mistruth going on.
2006-08-16 02:43:38 · answer #2 · answered by lasalle_1986 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it might make you feel better... but what happens when the ex-fiance doesn't want it for just this one time? You going to keep seeing him then? Are you going to be able to dump him? He may be more fun than your cheating ****** of a husband that stepped out on you and now wants you to wash is underwear and be happy about it. (sorry, got a little carried away there) If I were you I would just plan on leaving when the youngest is 18 and in the meantime, start on a great career and start stashing lots of money away for your escape. Once a cheat, always a cheat, next time just be prepared to leave.
2006-08-16 10:05:01 · answer #3 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
two wrongs don't make a right but in your case,if he's done it once and got away with it he will more than likely do it again down the road.you on the other hand could end your marriage and move on and still have your morals and dignity or sink to his level.if you can live with yourself and screw around like he did ,then your no better.that means your both sluts with no morals what so ever . thats why soceity has no values anymore,men think with the wrong head and woman don't use there head.sexually transmitted diseases are running wild because people have no moral values anymore ,don't get sucked in to be one of them.like i said say goodbye or put up with the crap .you are the good person and he's a piece of crap for hurting you and your children,stick to your morals the way it used to be. good luck tim
2006-08-16 02:55:39 · answer #4 · answered by tim p 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It varies from state to state actually some states will enable a upward push in toddler help established upon the 2d spouses revenues. exceptionally if the present help paid is an "adujstment" universal upon the daddy's means to pay. If the adjudicated volume is say $four hundred.00 a month and up except this factor he might want to suited discover the money for say $250.00 a month then definite your income might want to be further to amplify the funds to the adjudicated volume. the actual undeniable actuality that the ex better 1/2's present day husband makes heavily more effective doesn't enter into the equation in any understand. Your husband maximum in all probability has no longer signed over parental rights to him and he has obvioulsy no longer followed the female so he's decrease than no responsibility to help her even inspite of the undeniable fact that she is residing in his abode. (even inspite of the undeniable fact that he maximum in all probability does so conveniently from an ethical attitude afterall she is his spouse's daughter). yet legally his income has no longer something to do with something, and neither does her mom's revenues. What has been set down by technique of the court is what counts, and if it notably hurts your skill on your lives at the same time that's merely too undesirable. You married someone with luggage...you ought to have got here upon the best deal there grow to be once appropriate to his "luggage" formerly than you married him. Like I reported it varies from state to state. that's some ingredient you may probbly might want to search for suggestion from a criminal professional about. BTW youngster help doesn't continually end at age 18, depending on the suited way it grow to be once attached youngster help can very last except the toddler is 23 as long as they're in organization. My daughter's youngster help (she is now 21) grow to be universal by technique of way of massive apple state and they award youngster help by technique of technique of age 21 pondering in relatives regulation childrens are minors except age 21. and thanks to the very actuality she is a student HER toddler help wll no longer end unitl her twenty third birthday or except she is in the different case emancipated.
2016-11-25 20:42:16 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting even does not mean it will make you feel better. Two wrong actions do not cancel each other, they add up to two people who are cheating.
You already know that cheating is wrong and it hurts people. You need to meet with the counselor by yourself and see how to deal with the left-over issues of your husband's affair.
2006-08-16 02:39:39 · answer #6 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know this is cheesy, but two wrongs don't make a right. Cheating on him in return won't make anything better. Talking to him and letting him know that you still remember and that you're still upset about his infidelity will.
2006-08-16 02:39:19 · answer #7 · answered by Sexy Lexy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that's how you think of relationships - as being "even"...then the marriage is already over. You should ease his misery and leave now.
2006-08-16 02:39:57 · answer #8 · answered by drumrb0y 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go for it. he got laid, why shouldn't you right?? just bang the dude then go back to your husband
2006-08-16 02:35:44 · answer #9 · answered by jmthomb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him you want to sleep with your ex, he may want to join you!
2006-08-16 02:47:38 · answer #10 · answered by sarah l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋