Is my son old enough?

Question

My son is 8, he will be 9 in October. He has been telling me that he wants to grow his hair long "like the guy from ACDC". I think if that's what he wants than he is old enough to make that kind of decision. My exhusband and his girlfriend have threatened to take him to get it cut. He (my son) has a huge swirly on the front of his head and it stands up and since his hair has started to grow (it's like an inch long on top), the calic is growing out and finally starting to lay down. He's had the same haircut since his very first one. My ex's mother is the one that has always taken it upon herself to take him and cut his hair and it is driving her crazy that it is touching the top of his ear. What do you think?

Answer 1

I think that you should let him grow his hair that way, but see if you can convince him to let a hairdresser tidy it up a bit. You know, still long but neatly cut too. I think that while it is important to maintain authority over such young children, it is wise to let them change their body like that if they wish (but no peircings or tattoos!). If you deny them that priveledge, you are setting yourself up for an even more rebellious child when he's a teenager.

My parents gave me a little leeway when I was younger, and as a result I got to avoid that teenage pot-smoking parent hating phase. That way children aren't itching for a chance to defy their parents, since they see that you tolerate their individuality within reason.

Answer 2

I have a soon to be 8 yr old daughter and a 12 year old son they are the ones that have to wear the hair so they should have a choice in it.. Screw what the ex's gf thinks it's not her kid it's yours. Personally my son is into short hair however we have went though phases where it has been many different colors i just buy the wash out stuff and let him have at it there are so many things wrong with kids these days that small issues shouldn't matter to anyone and after all even at age 9 he has some rights and i honestly feel unless its something you just can not tolerate let him have the choice after all he is the one that has to live with it... Good Luck

Answer 3

I am with ya completely on letting the child having a chance to express himself with something as simple as a hairstyle - it is not permanent and allows a child to show individuality in a safe way. My 7 yr old has always wanted brush cuts because he did not like to brush his hair. About two months ago he told me he wanted to grow it out so he could get it long enough to cut it into a mohawk or liberty spikes. I hate how it looks shaggy right now but I keep my mouth closed and I will let him try this now - hopefully it is short lived!

Answer 4

Let him express himself! My son just turned 9, and his dad took him to get his ear pierced. So what?? Kids need to be able to express their individuality too. My son likes the John Cena haircut, but even if he didn't, TOUCHING the ears is not too long or odd. Let him fit in or stand out a bit. And it's not up his grandmother. Set some boundaries, and give him choices, and enjoy his individuality. If he gets teased about his "long" hair...you can bet he'll be asking for a cut. Pick your battles...believe me, hair is not the big battle!

Answer 5

My stepson is 15 he grew his hair out and it looked hidious it was in his eyes he would put a hood over his head he looked like the grim reaper. I bugged him and bugged him to cut his hair. His real mom didn't care she let him grow it long it was past his shoulders about 3 inches. My husband threatened him to go get a hair cut but was afraid he would not want to come over (which I thought was ridiculous. My stepson got into trouble at school and his mom finally had him cut his hair and he looks so much better you can see his cute little eyes.

Answer 6

your the mother hes the child i have three sons 21 20 and 18 since they born they have had short hair no questions asked ya sure they wanted longer hair but i made the decisions they were not going to walk around looking like crap and i personally think that young boys should have short hair.guess what at their age they still have short hair and they can make up their own minds now.boys look horrible with long hair in my opinion.i dont like it and never have now with your ex mom in law it really is none of her business and u need to ask her not to take him for hair cuts any more.you asked opinion and that is mine im not trying to be hurtful but he will be made fun of how many little guys do u know that really have long hair

Answer 7

I think giving your son a little freedom isn't going to hurt anything. This isn't the 40's...having his hair a little long isn't illegal or nasty in anyway. In fact, it's fashionable. Just don't let his get carried away, like tell him he has to wash it and brush it, keep it neat or something of that nature.Your ex-mother-in-law sounds like a prude and it sounds like the ex-husband is just following in her footsteps while the new girlfriend just agrees and does as he says...I hope I'm not being too forward, but this is just as much your son as it is his and it should be between you 2, the mother and girlfriend need to be left out of it.

Answer 8

It's should be his own choice what length he wishes to grow his hair. Personally i don't think he's too young to make that kind of decision, if he wants his hair long, then let him have his hair long. It's probably only a phase he's going through, before you know it he'll be wanting something else.

Answer 9

If he is willing to wash and brush it, then let him grow it out long. He is trying to be different, and it won't last long at his age.

Besides... it's just hair! You can cut before Christmas with the excuse "Granny doesn't want you looking that way for holiday pictures", and you won't be the bad guy.

-Mother of 12 year old boy.

Answer 10

i think he is old enough to make his own decision on the type of hair cut he wants. Its not like he wants to dye it some funky color or anything. I think you all need to sit down and talk about this, before it gets out of hand. Sit down with your ex and his girlfriend, and who ever is having a problem with it, and explain it... sit down, even with your son there, and come to a happy medium.

Good luck and best wishes