help, i dont know what to do about my spoiled baby?

Question

i play with my 8 month daughter all the time, i buy her new things and she has all the toys she could ever want. me and her father have a wonderful marrage and never fight. we take her places and hold her all the time. we both give her lots and lots of attention. but the minute we sat her down to play by herself, even though we are always in the same room with her, she wants to be held 24/7. she dont have a baby sitter of any kind and is always with us. i try and try to let her cry it out to show her but that dont work either. i dont know what to do. me and my husband cant do anything together at all. i love my baby and everything but i just get back ache holding her all the time. please help...

Answer 1

They won't spoil as fast if you keep 'em in the freezer.

Answer 2

if she was younger I'd say no way she is spoiled she actually needs that much attention. She is getting to a age that she should have the ability to play alone and settle herself down as long as she is not tired hungry or wet. If you let her cry sometimes then pick her up sometimes she will get confused. You have to STICK with letting her CALM herself. It will not hurt her as long as all her needs are taken care of. It is hard to hear her cry 4 you i know she will cry less and less once she gets the message you are not going to pay attention she will entertain herself faster once you ignore her. Make sure she is in a safe place like a playpen has toys and is feed not tired not hungry she will get the message "in time". Maybe you are expecting her to ply alone at bad times 4 her a tired baby will want held. The best advice to any parent trying to change a behavior is be consistent with what you expect. It is even okay to leave the room "as long as she is in a playpen" to let her calm down. Some kids are more high attention then others remember shes not trying to annoy or be spoiled she is just being herself at that age kids don't know how to be mean. Moms and dad have the same problem with getting toddlers to sleep in there own room when they allow the child to sleep in their room then insist they sleep in their own room the kid dose not know what is expected of them YOU MUST ALWAYS follow thru always make it clear that you will not budge even a little.

Answer 3

maybe first of all u need not to hold her as much yea you gotta hug them and wonna kiss them all the time but think when u start working if shes going to daycare u should break her from that cause they don't like crying babies and plus u don't want to do a drop in on the daycare just to see how every thing is going with her on her first couple of days and she is screaming to the top of her lungs u r gonna be mad *** hell cause no one wants to hold her tell u what u do is say u r doing some house cleaning and shes crying get a blanket lay her on the floor on her belly and just put a gang of toys around her since she is eight months put her in her walker and turn on some music loud enough and start dancing she will stop crying and start looking and then shut up cause she knows mommy cant here her any more,or put her in front of the TV in her swing and turn to some cartoons then you will find more time to ur self and maybe then u can do some house work if u r in Minnesota turn to B96 radio station and u and her will jam you'll find Ur self doing a whole lot more good luck and stop spoiling that sweetie pie.

Answer 4

Okay. Read over what you said. You and your husband hold her all the time and give her tons of attention. You also buy her so many toys. You are not allowing your child to develop her own personality, character or creativeness. All children need to do that. You don't mention if she plays with other babies. If not, you have another problem and that is teaching her to share. Leave her alone (in the house with you of course) for several segments of time during the day. Kids like to play with pots and pans and clothes baskets and boxes. She will begin to realize she doesn't need you to be holding her all the time and you will both be happier.

Answer 5

Umkay, im babysitting a baby thats kind of like that, shes 14 month old and can walk though, when ever mommy has to leave the house the baby cries and cries and cries, but you just have to let the babysitter take her from you and take her somewhere where mommy cant be seen, she screams and cries and when i put her down she runs up the stairs looking for mommy, but after about 10 imn. shes fine and were playing a game, then she takes a nap, and is fine the rest of the day, its really pretty easy, just get a babysitter, i babysit this baby for 7 to 8 hours for the last 2 weeks but really you justneed to let her cry, and be glad shes not walking yet

Answer 6

You don't need to hold her all the time. That is what spoiled her. If you continue treating her the same in the future then you have a hard life ahead of you, with her and your back. She may turn out to be a spoiled brat and no one likes those kinds of people.

Continue to play with her, hold her, and give her affection (that makes good parents) but try to slowly minimize it to an acceptable level to where she will allow you to put her down.

Answer 7

hi, leaving her to cry will not solve your problem. instead try diverting her to which interests her. you can give her some finger food to nibble, when she is playing with it, leave her down, just keep an eye on her. i'm sure an eight month old baby would be interested now to do something on her own, in case of food! or else find which TV shows interests her. my 9 month old son is interested in advertisements. so find what she likes. during that time let her sit down. i'm not saying to keep TV switched on all the time. just do it for some time. then all babies, to my knowledge, are interested to play with kitchen utensils. so, choose things that are harmless, like plastic spoons, bowls etc and give to her. kids are never interested in toys that we buy for them. they won't touch it after a day or two. so try giving new things, which you uses, that are harmless. in this way she would be engaged, and will not bother you all the time. also when playing or trying to stand up, she might fall and cry. if you think shez not hurt, don't go running to help her. let her to divert herself. in the beginning she would turn to you only for help. do not see her at that time. slowly she would become independent.
overall, no set rules will help to bring up a child. just know her and help her grow in her own way. good luck!!!

Answer 8

Our son Adam WAS well on his way to doing this same thing...actually he (at the age of 5 yrs) still TRYS to pull the spoiled rotten act!! You just have to put her down..and walk away..she hasn't had to self comfort herself..We were lucky enough to have our last son..who will be 3 in Feb~ He's REALLY the reason Adam isn't still spoiled rotten...It's just something that you HAVE to force yourself to do...warn the babysitter that she may cry alot...but she'll slowly learn that she can be alright by herself..with you rooms away... GOOD LUCK!

The crying MAY seem like too much..she'll probably turn 8 different colors doing it...my son managed to make himself get sick..but it's the only way they will STOP!! Trust me...I love my son too...but you have to draw the line or you'll be carrying her when she's 3-4 yrs old..and weighs alot more than she does now...

Answer 9

Nip this in the bud and QUICK or you and your husband will start to have trouble.

This child needs a sitter, preferably in your home. Start out with maybe just being gone and hour, seeing how that works. Next time, try two hours. Maybe while you need to shop, or something like that. You need to work up to more time. Also, playtime with other young children would be great. I cannot stress how important it is to start weaning yourself away from your infant. It is healthy for all three of you.

Answer 10

It's a stage and she will get over it. Babies tend to go through separation anxiety at a few stages as they grow. She is learning that she is not "attached at the hip". Put her down to play on her own a few times a day, but stay near her and talk to her and reassure her. Try playing "hide and seek". Put her down and hide around the other side of a chair or couch or something. Be patient.

Answer 11

Im sorry to say that you might be doomed. I would say just dont hold her as much. dont give her anymore toys until the old ones get worn. And also ignore her when she throws a fit. Keep playing with her though. get her a babysitter. You and your husband WILL need some alone time trust me.