How do you get over someone you love so much?

Question

It's funny to even ask this kind of question because I bet nobody knows the answer, right?
We were engaged, we loved eachother so much, but we broke up last monday. It's all my fault, I admit and I think knowing that makes the whole situation even harder.
I cry every single night, maybe even during the day when I'm home alone. I can't sleep, I always think about him. I miss him. I realy don't know what to do. He was my true love, my life companio, my soulmate and my best friend and now I lost him.
Haw can I live with myself knowing it's all my fault?
I know it will pass, but, you'll laugh, I'm affraid I'll stop loving him.
How can I make the pain to go away?

Answer 1

Hey Celia,

I am going through the same phase of life. I wont say much. But if you know that you were wrong, just give it a GO. Beg, grovel, kneel down and try as much as you can. It will hurt you, you will feel the pain and you perhaps you may not get him back, but it still is worth it.

If he is rude to you, let him be.

Love is beyond pride, beyond ego, beyond self esteem.

JUST GO FOR IT. It's worth it. And dont leave it on the time to heal your wounds. Take control of your life. You dont want to regret that you dint make an effort when you look back after 5-10 years down the line. Do you??

But do it if it really feels RIGHT and you know that you love him.

GO>>>>>

All my best and true wishes are with you.

Answer 2

Everyone (including you) knows the answer...but no one wants to hear it...TIME. ALOT OF IT! You broke up last Monday and now is just about the time it is starting to "sink in" that what you had is gone and not going to come back. Not sleeping, crying, thinking about him all the time...that is just normal right now. It is a process you go through to get to the end of it.

I don't know the specifics of WHY you broke up or WHY it was your fault...but it must have ended for a good reason if you were all that you say you were. I completely understand "I'm afraid I'll stop loving him." You have a connection with another person that is strong...and you always assumed that it would be there...and then confronted with the reality that it will not...you start to miss what you know is coming...them not being involved in your life (and vice versa) anymore.

The pain will go away on its own (IN TIME) if you don't think about it constantly. Crying...not a bad idea. But at a certain point you will realize that you can cry all you want...they will still be gone. Just try to break it out in terms of DAYS. Just get through one day at a time...eventually you won't have to get through a day and it will get easier and not hurt nearly as much. I really don't think you can ever stop loving someone you are connected to...if that is at all comforting. You just begin to realize that you love them...but you can love someone else, too!

Hang in there!! It WILL get better with time...that is a promise!! : )

Answer 3

My friend, I am at the same stage. My gf broke up with me 3 weeks ago. I even sat in front of her door for 5 hours on that day. She didn't come out and open the door. I know how much she cares about me. So, I walked home. I ended it pretty bad. Everyday I tried to think about it but still haunted by sadness. Now after 3 weeks, I feel better. At least, I can funtion as a normal human. But still.. once a while..for a few seconds, I feel sad. Just like an electic shock in my heart. Feel kinda heavy and wonder what she is doing there now.

I am not doing anything special to make pain go away faster. If you force yourself to see someone and pretend to be happy. It will make yourself feel more sad. So, I just let it be. Sounds easy but it is not.

Just tell yourself ...
This pain is good. It is good because it make you become stronger. You feel less hurt should same situation happen. This pain reminds you that you are growing and not stopping at the same spot. Just don't talk it PERSONALLY (yes capital letters). He doesn't want to be with you not because of you. It's just because he doesn't want relationship at this moment.

You know you will be ok. This is not the first time of having relationship, dont ya?

Just hang in there.

Answer 4

Maybe since it's something that you did, you can make it right again with him. If you were engaged than the two of you must have had a serious relationship. It must be worth fighting for. You could suggest counsling. If he doesn't want to then you will just have to wait for the pain to go away. Time heals all wounds, I know right now it seems like nothing will help, but it will get better. Just hang in there and I will say a prayer for you tonight. Good Luck.

Answer 5

If you loved eachother that much maybe when some time passes both of you will realize that you should be together. But for right now, do something to get your mind off everything. Watch a re-run of your favorite show; take a long bath or shower; do a hobby or past time, anything to just clear your head and reprogram yourself. I am sure everything will work out in the long run. Things take time, annoyingly. Hope I helped some.

Answer 6

You probally not going to like this answer but time will heal, I know exactiley how you feel I'm still in love with someone from almost three years ago, I just try to do the best I can and keep myself very busy, I also do alot of praying,if realised that if I truley love her I will let her live her life regarliss of what I want., I dont think I will ever get over her, but as time goes by it does get easier

Answer 7

I read your question and I felt it was me. I went through exactly the same thing 4 months ago. The truth, you'll never stop loving him. Eventually the pain slowly goes away, but never completely. Sometimes you can be o.k., but when you're alone, that's the hardest time. Try to occupy your time with family and friends. Try to never be alone. The fact that you know it's your fault will also eat at your heart. As cliche as it sounds, time will heal your wounds. People kept telling me that and I hated it, but it's true. If you need someone to talk to, contact me. Your not alone.

Answer 8

You can't, nor should you want to. The pain makes it real. If you love and lost, and if it was truly your fault, hopefully you will learn from this situation and know the pain you have caused another. If that is true, purpose in your heart that the next time....and mean it.

A journal may help. If you are sincere and you really want to be introspective about this.

Answer 9

Funny I know this guy going through the same thing.. they were engaged and she just broke up with him for no apparent reason I think he was her first, but some things happend and she left him.. hes really hurt I tell him to get over it but I guess its not that easy all I can say is that time will heal all your pains.. you can wait for time or you can try to win him back.. good luck

Answer 10

the only thing that will make the hurt stop is time. i know that is a horrible horrible answer... but it's true. there is nothing anyone can do or say to heal your wounds. i just went through a break up (in january) that was very difficult for me. she was my true love and i could have spent forever with her, and that wouldn't have been enough time. just take it day by day... and if that's too much, moment be moment.