Why do women who are married act so self righteous when it comes to child rearing?

Question

I raised 2 kids alone because my ex husband had an affair with his company payroll clerk. My kids were 11 months and 3 yrs old.
Welfare sent me to college and I obtained a 2 yr degree. I dont claim to be anything spectacular, but I did what was needed to get my kids raised and keep us from starvation.
My son is an excellent, responsible hard working 21 yr old who plans on going to college this fall. He saves his money and works at Walmart.
My daughter on the other hand who lived with her dad for about 5 years is a mess. She has put me thru the pits of hell and I have so many problems with her. She will not work. She shacked up with a 25 yr old man who is still married. She sleeps all day. She has no money, no motivation and I expect will be a teen mother because she refuses to take birth control.
The married or the women who's ex husbands pay child support seem to be so critical. The women who aren't married and have raised kids alone are more supportive.
WHY?

I am generalizing. Thanks for the positives and sometimes I forget I am not the only one who did it. I get on a pity party and wonder how I did it sometimes.

Answer 1

I am not sure it is about child rearing.. i raised four kids on my own and I think that the married women were more jelous than anything.. i did notice they treated me different than when i was married...

Even my sister thought she was all it but.. the real truth is that now you are single and doing well and getting some where in life as a women and they are still ruled by their husband.

Answer 2

You are stereotyping people, hon. Not all married women are self-righteous about marital issues or child-rearing. Self-righteous people.....are self-righteous, and 5 will get you 10 nthey were like that BEFORE they got married. My mother was widowed at an early age and I have admired her strength and courage. When I see a single mother bettering herself, struggling to do what is right for her family...I respect that and empathize with her struggle. I know how that goes, even though my marriage is stable and my kids are well-adjusted. I was the crazy kid that came from a dysfunctional.."broken" family. I am an example of what a single mother who never gives up can accomplish in the realm of "child-rearing". I can only hope to be half the mother MY mother was. For goodness sake...she had to be TWICE AS STRONG. How is that not something to support?

Answer 3

false sense of security.

having been a single mom always afraid of the next bill being paid...then being a remarried mom now a little more @ ease...I remember how difficult and how proud I was that my single raised kids were not thugs....

Not all of us remember that or have even experienced it.

Just smile and change the subject.

and what does the details of your daughter's struggles have to do with married women demonstrating superiority in child rearing? wouldn't that be on dad to not have had a handle on things as well as you did with your son?

Answer 4

Have you interviewed everyone or are you just making generalizations? I'm a married woman with three kids and I think you have done a great job,sometimes its just out of your control what kids do. are at least what kids do when they are adults. Sad to say but you can do only so much and only say so much, in the end its their life and they get to make the decisions right or wrong. Good lick and much happiness

Answer 5

i think you should send her off or let her learn the hard way!!!