What do you think of my Poem?

Question

Benji

Sweet, sexy, beautiful, hot Benji.
Your as benjaful as can be.
Sweet and sexy Made man of Tattoos.
What ever you might be?!?!
My sexy punk rocker Benji Madden of that
dear punk rock band Good Charlotte, who
plays that sexy, sweet looking guitar, and
is also vocals along with that twin brother of
yours named Joel who is just lead vocals.
Benji...Benji...what ever could I do without
that sexy man you are?
The man of piercings, tattoos, and makeup...
Your the sexiest man in the universe.
That dear, sweet, sexy , beautiful, hot Benji.
This made man of tattoos who has piercings, wears
makeup, and has those awesome but sexy
tattoos...either way it all matches you!

By: Me!

oh...btw, if you don't have anything nice to say...don't say anthing at all...and if you think this poem sux...stick it up your a**...i don't wanna hear you whine your head off...and just because you can't write a poem as good...stick it where the sun don't shine!
I can careless bout what u think! what u think?

well I made this poem ok...ppl who don't like don't u even answer...u do i will report u if u aint got nothing nice to say! This means more than once!!

Answer 1

I actually think the poem is cute and personal. How you stick with the topic of Benji, it seems like you're actually talking to him. I did an ode to a person before too. It's good, hon'

Answer 2

It's okay. I think that you can write pretty well, and that you are great at odes. I've never wrote odes to people, but I read a lot of good poetry, and that you're almost as good as those famous poets.

And I think you should write synonyms for sexy too, so you would be saying what you mean but with a few different words.

Overall: Cool. The person who you're writing about will love it.

Answer 3

Nice, but very wordy. Need to pare this one down.

My take....

Benjaful man of Tattoos, who are you?
Sweet guitar, sexy vocals, what would I be without you?
The body of Good Charlotte, mods and makeup
Is you.

"I can careless bout what u think! what u think?"
Why post this question if you don't care?

Answer 4

it's a nice ode but you can work on some stuff...

btw you asked a question "What do you think of my Poem?" so people are going to tell you what they think. not that it's good and nothing else. when you put your work out there you have to be ready to take the words of critics. it isn't fair to you (or anyone else for that matter) if you only allow them to say said poem is good even if it's bad (and i'm not saying your poem is bad btw).

Answer 5

I like it! Maybe a little too passionate in a restraining order kind of way though! I LOVE the word Benjaful!!! ;-)

Answer 6

its good i like benji to you just need to practice on the flow of youre poems a little more and youll be just fine. i liked the poem overall

Answer 7

isn't benji a dog from like the 80's to 90's? one that was acting all lassie and saving stuff.

Answer 8

try describing what makes him sexy. what about the piercings, the tatoos and the makeup. describe how the shape of the guitar matches is muscles (or something else), how his piercings pierce your admiration for him..

:D

have fun in your revision!

Answer 9

I geuss your not one to acept constructive critisism... how to you get better if you don't let others help you out?

Not being mean but its extremly redundant, and Good Charlotte is Pop-punk.

Answer 10

peanut, i think your poem is just fine. it's unusual, creates good images during the reading,kept my interest, and seems heartfelt and personal--never pay attention to what others think in art matters. the troglodytes always outnumber the artists by around 10,000 to one, at least, i'm sure. :-)