People say it's all downhill once your married...is that true? If so, how and why?
2006-08-15 10:01:55 · 53 answers · asked by Strawberry 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Only if you let it.
If the couple is committed to making their relationship work thru the good and bad then they will only get stronger and better with time.
2006-08-15 10:11:33 · answer #1 · answered by Brea1243 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People tend to think that once they get married, life is going to be easier for some reason. That they can sit and relax. But, the truth is, being married is hard. It takes a lot of dedication, determination, and WORK. Getting married is really the beginning. To make a marriage work, BOTH people must give 100%, not 50/50. My husband and I have been living together for 4 years, and we are just now adjusting to each other. The first couple of years are usually the hardest for a couple. There's finances, bills, pay checks, selfishness, unwillingness to compromise, demanding spirits.
Believe it or not, each partner usually has an idea in their mind of how married life is going to be. My husband came into our relationship thinking I was going to be like his mom. She did everything for him, and was taught that the men just work and come home and let the woman take care of him. WRONG!! We argued for a good year before we both decided to compromise with each other. There is also the issue about having kids. A lot of people think it will bring parents closer, but really, it can seperate them if there is no lack of communication. You have to remember that you guys are a team, and with each other's help, the marriage can succeed.
Some couples get married and don't really have in mind to stay committed and focused on the relationship, as soon as they start arguing, they are ready to walk out the door. The truth is, every relationship has struggles, arguments, etc. It wouldn't be a real relationship if it didn't. That's when true colors come out, during arguments. But, if you use those fights and bickers to help you learn your partners weaknesses, strengths, etc, then you really can succeed. I did!
2006-08-15 10:16:59 · answer #2 · answered by amyvnsn 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So far since I've been married I absolutlely disagree about it going down hill. I LOVE being married! :) My parents have been married for over 30 years and are still madly in love. It takes work though, but when its with the right person and you both truly love eachother and never stop commincating with eachother and at the same time find different ways to compromise every thing will be great! Just dont let the fire burn out and have faith.
2006-08-15 10:12:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it does not go downhill in a marriage if the two really love each other...true they have problems but you are suppose to work them out... and one thing i know is to keep the romance in the marriage...really some people find married life to be really happy...also i would not let myself go downhill if i was to get married..some people do that and they wake up one day and find this was not the person i married...but basically be honest, faithful and true to your mate...and keep things interesting in your marriage and keep the romance in your marriage....
2006-08-15 10:08:43 · answer #4 · answered by sanangel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ordinary pressures of bills, children, job, money, in-laws, etc. are enough to sap the joy and romance from any marriage. Just being aware of these pitfalls will help avoid/overcome them. The most important thing is to never lose respect for one another and pull together as a team. The minute partners start to go their own way, then it truly is down hill from there.
2006-08-15 10:12:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if that's your attitude about marriage, then your marriage will probably suck :( some couples are more compatible than others and they stay together for ever, but most people just split up. once you live together and get married, you get sick of each other and don't appreciate each other anymore because you see that person's face every day, and you feel like you're not growing as a person on your own. i'm trying to not be too negative about it, and if i ever get married someday i hope i make the right choices and make it last!! :))))
2006-08-15 10:08:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the biggest reason people say this is because they have unrealistic expectations. Marriage can be awesome, but not all the time. Living with another person is hard because you each have different wants and needs...not to mention things that annoy you. If you anticipate this and commit to compromising, then you will enjoy marriage. If you get married so the other person will make you happy, forget about it.
2006-08-15 10:06:35 · answer #7 · answered by gurugirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think so. i've only been married for a year but we r the same as we always have been. we've been together for about 5 years. it just depends on the person u marry. if u 2 are ment to be then u should be fine. just take things one day at a time and if u really love each other u will be together thru thick and thin.
2006-08-15 10:08:00 · answer #8 · answered by emilybailey1980 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my first marriage yeah did went down the hill.. my ex wife treat me like crap deaf and dumb she is hearing. and she always left me out when ever we go places and stuff.. threat to divorce me 4 time last 8 months and I had it and Left. Before I left she want to have a baby I told her nope. she said why? becasue we have so many disagreement here. not worth it for me.
So I remarried to my second wife and my gosh it so much better and It sometime go up and down ... not just once married going stright down the hill... nope we enjoy eachother alot and I sure love her to death so is she and also we enjoy have2 kids and 3rd on the way march 2007.
It work when you guys talk about it and learn mistake and move on and know what best for the family.. then shouldn't be a plm.. if one not and other do then not work out...
My wife and I always share things alot with each other and our kids too smiling.
2006-08-15 10:39:54 · answer #9 · answered by greenbaypackers1920 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage like any relationship is what u make it. If you neglect it, it will fall apart. If you settle in the notion of "oh i've snagged her/him" no need for me to do those 'extra things"/"special things" anymore..gradually stop doing what u were before...then ur sh*t will go downhill. If you lose "touch" with each other you will go downhill. It's an everyday thing...it take work/patience/communication, & of course the true desire to be with each other & when problems do occur you work them out..or at least try to. You recognize that no one/anything is PERFECT..so dont expect him/her/it to be...
2006-08-15 10:20:45 · answer #10 · answered by REAL24/7 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on the people themselves, to make things successful you need to work on it. Those who work to keep their marriage a happy one will have a better life after marriage but those who dont then obviously their marriage will go downhill.
2006-08-15 10:06:36 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋