I don't want him anymore, but were together because of our son..?

Question

My boyfriend and I are having problems, We just had our first son together in January. The only reason why we are together is because of him, do you think that is a good idea. I was always the type of person that wanted my son to have his father around. But I can't stand my boyfriend. If I tell him to leave I know that he won't see his son ever. So what do I do? I don't love him anymore...Very confused?

Answer 1

I understand what u goin throught but u hurting urself by staying with him and u know u don't want to be with him cause of ur son i been there and i know it hard, but u have to tell him how u feel and don't worry about him not being around he will be more than u every know. I was in ur shoe and trust me my sons father seem them everyday. from the time they go to school for the time they go to bed, he take the out every weekend and my sons knows what mommy and daddy can't be together, but my ex boyfriend and I we get along much better then when we was together. Sit him down tell him how u feel and do the same for ur son depends on how old ur son is so u son could understand why mommy don't want daddy no more. it easy said and done it take time in ur heart u know when is the right time to talk to him.

good luck

Answer 2

I can tell you from experience staying in a relationship for the kids sake does not work and if you feel this strongly about it then you know in your heart what you need to do and with that being said you cannot make him come to see his son thats his responsibility,if you and your sons Father seperate he's still obligated to provide what his son needs so that part is really up to him.

Answer 3

Leave him and get child support. If he is such a lowlife why would you want him to even help raise your child in the first place. If you don't love him and are with him only b/c of your child, that will only cause controversies b/t the two of you and you son is going to grow up in a very hostile environment. In this case what you think you are doing for your son, is probably going to be even worse.

Answer 4

I always say that it is never good to stay together for the sake of the child. If you break up and the father doesn't come around, it is his loss. Focus on your son. He needs you. Good luck.

Answer 5

You could Make like 2 or 3 or 4 play dates a week where he could come over and spend time with the baby... Or You could make a baby bag and send the baby to his house for a few hours ~only do this if you have confidence that he ~could/ WOULD~ make right choices and have good judgment...~ My parents stayed together for me till i was ten... and it was nice.. But the constant bickering and fighting and the ~love ~ that wasn't really there makes me wish they were split up before I was ten...

Answer 6

Theres no point in staying with him if u don't love him. And if he chooses not to see is son, well then its his lost because he's gonna miss out. Its not gonna be healthy for ur son to see u guys fighting all the time.

Answer 7

This is tough. First of all if your b/f cares for his son, then he will commit to always being a part of his life. If you ask him to leave, and he is no longer a part of your son's life, that is his choice. Find someone who will accept you and your son and make you both happy.

Answer 8

Well you can arrange visits for your son to meet his father weekly. You dont have to live or stay with him if you are unhappy. Because im 18 and my parents went through alot and i would have rathered my mom be happy then be miserable.

Answer 9

let him leave and make him pay for child support for the kid