I am not an unattractive man. Have had many women come on to me and still do. It seems that I have to say something everytime I want attention from my wife. I refuse to beg or demand for sex.Divorce is out of the question because I have more to lose than the wife and grown kids.what should I do?
2006-08-15 05:35:48 · 16 answers · asked by desayunogratis 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When you say you have more to lose, I assume you mean money and assets. Man, if that is what you mean, you are in a tough spot. I cant make an honest suggestion, but I can say that if you get caught cheating, that she will divorce you and then she will get all that stuff you have to lose anyway. But on the other hand, you can regain money and assets, so you have to do what makes you happy inside. You personal happiness should matter more than your money.
2006-08-15 05:44:49 · answer #1 · answered by kbjcw 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Time to sit down and have a heart to heart with the wife. Considering your kids are grown now is the time for you 2 to make love in every room of the house and walk around nude if you choose. Explore your new freedom from the kids, regain the fun and spirit that possibly dulled as a result of raising a family. She needs to know how important physical contact is to you. Telling her that you need to make love to her is not begging for sex. I would not advise cheating, as you said, you have more to lose.
2006-08-15 05:45:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If divorce is out of the question then you should be married. Being married means expressing your love for her by finding out why she is not interested in sex. I don't mean ask her. Sounds to me as if you haven't been a very supportive husband. You've known her for 22 yrs. you should be able to practically read her mind by now. If you have really gotten to know her (like you were supposed to) and been supportive (like you were supposed to) you'd know why she has no interest in sex. An unsupportive husband is the NUMBER 1 reason women don't want sex. You made this mess do you care enough to fix it? If not (or if you cheat) you'll end up divorced anyway.
2006-08-15 05:50:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is very important in any relationship....Just sit down with your wife and talk it out...let her know how you feel about her not showing interest to you.
Talk to her about the same things you are asking us about. It may be a hard thing to do, but if you truly love your wife and children, then it will be worth it!!
It sounds to me like you've got cheating on your mind. Define "attention". Do you mean "sexual" attention or general attention(talking, going to movies, etc.)? If your wife doesn't know that it bothers you, then she sees no problem....Talk it out!!! Be yourself and let her know what's on your mind. Open the door to communication...your wife may have more to say than you think....maybe there's something bothering her also...there's only one way to find out and cheating is not the way!!
Good Luck
2006-08-15 05:57:11 · answer #4 · answered by STRETCH 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't listen to morons on here advocating cheating. If you have even the smallest of a conscience, you will feel guilty and ashamed after the instant gratification wears off. Be up front with your wife. You might even learn something. Like why she's withholding affection.
2006-08-15 05:50:09 · answer #5 · answered by T S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's put 22 years into this too. Maybe mention it to her that cheating crossed your mind, and ask her what's wrong.
You said it yourself, you have a lot to lose. So, if you really want to be happy, getting caught cheating isn't the way to go. Find out what's different, it's in your best interests to make your marriage work.
2006-08-15 05:53:11 · answer #6 · answered by 42ITUS™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't cheat. Your vows are sacret and you should honor them.
You also said you have more to lose than she does if you get divorced if she finds out you cheated she will probably take you to the cleaners!
Maybe you should go on a romantic weekend get away! Try to put some spark back in your relationship.
2006-08-15 05:43:43 · answer #7 · answered by Farmgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its ridiculous to NOT divorce if your planning on cheating. If divorce is out of the question.....cheating should be out of the question too. Sit the wife down and talk, ask question, tell her how you feel. Spark that marriage back up and know this...SHE could file divorce on you so divorce is ALWAYS in the equation. So if you stand to lose more via divorce I suggest you spark it up real quick dude!!!!!!!!
2006-08-15 05:49:33 · answer #8 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, don't cheat on her. You will never fix the marriage if you disrespect her and make her feel like dirt.
Start over. Date her. Court her. Re-establish your friendship. Tell her you love her. It will fun! Just like when you dated here and courted her before.
See a marriage counselor to help you get things going again.
2006-08-15 05:47:00 · answer #9 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have more to lose then your wife yet your asking if you should cheat? You do see how those two thoughts don't go together.
2006-08-15 05:44:09 · answer #10 · answered by JB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋