My husband has suffered from anxiety and/or depression for years and recently it has been really bad. I'm 9 months pregnant and the stress is taking a huge toll on me. He will not take medication as he has always been against it but he does have an appt with a therapist tomorrow. I'm trying to be strong because when I get upset he gets worse but does anyone have any advice on how I can cope with this before I end up in counseling with him!?!
2006-08-15 04:38:42 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to change your mindset. You and the baby are first, first, first, first and then first. Understand? You only have one child to care for, not 2. ( the newborn and your husband ). If he wants to remain sick, let him. But don't go down with the ship. Start swimming.
2006-08-15 04:50:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband had problems with depression. He DID take his medicine and it did make a difference in his moods. I don't know if a therapist is the answer but sometimes talking to someone totally different and unknown could be a help. I suggest you don't dwell on it. Think of yourself and the baby. Men go through this just as women do. Zoloft is what my husband took but others are out there. He needs to talk with his doctor and may have to try different ones to see which is doing best. In the mean time talking and being supportive in this situation is good but not to make a huge deal over it. He also needs to realize he should not be selfish in your situation as well and do what is possible to overcome this.
2006-08-15 04:57:00 · answer #2 · answered by bugjuice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is depressed because he is going to have a child to love and take care of. You are about to have a baby and the stress will get worse. He is not sure if he did the right thing. Until you give birth to your child, you won't know what to do. He may just leave you and never come back, or he may stay, and get over his depression and stress and raise a child with you. You will, and can't know what he will do until he does it. No matter how many times he says " I'll stay with you till the end" , you don't know what he'll do until you give birth and get home. I know this sounds awful to hear, but you have to stay strong and powerful and keep him on your side, no matter what happens.
2006-08-15 04:50:05 · answer #3 · answered by magic_mando 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One thing at a time...Baby first...you and then support your husbands needs....he can't get straight until he can think without his emotions being on a roller coaster..he should be encouraged to seek the use of medication if he has not been able to make the necessary adjustments to cope with his every day circumstances...but for the moment...be reassured things will get better since he has considered seeing a therapist...and focus on lessening your own stress level and enjoying being a new mom soon....good luck.
2006-08-15 04:47:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depression is a REAL medical condition....NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN JUST SNAP OUT OF!!!!! Not only with depression but with many other medical situations, men are more likely to refuse to seek help....Tell your husband if he had diabetes or heart problems, or cancer you would want him to take the medication to help him to feel better, or get better!!!!!!!!!!! You being ready to have your baby and your husband being depressed for as long as he has, your husband and you definitely have some serious issues to seek professional help...it's good to hear he has an appt. tomorrow.... and if you do end up in couseling, not b/c you are depressed, but to understand the affects of depression not only on your husband but on you and your children as well....wishing you the best of luck and congrats on your new baby....
2006-08-15 04:54:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why wait for the baby to get here....go to counseling now....it will help! You will feel so much better! Go with or without ur husband! It's the best thing you can do for ur-self and ur marriage and that new little one! Why be stressed out about this? Just go talk to someone...you will be so glad you did! I know I was when I went!
2006-08-15 04:42:56 · answer #6 · answered by LeeLynn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to make it a point that you are about to have a baby to take care of first not him and that he needs to figure this out NOW..medications are needed maybe only temporarily. He needs to do this to help you and your baby out... sounds to me that he needs to be in a hospital for a while to get things sorted out. It will be hard on you to have him and a new baby both to deal with. See what he thinks about going to a mental facility for a while to get things jump started. If this is a no then maybe it is time to move on... You need to think about you and your babys well being first!
2006-08-15 04:44:21 · answer #7 · answered by *bossy* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is just scared because the baby is comming, I bet he feels that his life is going to change any minute that you explode.
Reinforce some positivity in him. Ask if he has some worries, then talk about the good things that are comming up.
Once he vents and thinks about the positive things that are comming i think he'll feel better.
2006-08-15 04:56:28 · answer #8 · answered by nonsanekp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds as if your husband is in need of professional help, and you need to do your best to ensure that he makes his appt and tries to get something out of it...though it sounds like you may need to talk with the therapist as well, and inform him/her about the stress that you are suffering due to his condition, and possibly consider getting therapy together, especially if you are serious about strengthing your marriage...good luck
2006-08-15 04:47:08 · answer #9 · answered by dalilvr333 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the bottom line is counselling for both of you. Does yr husband have brothers, good friends that you can talk to ? and get THEM to talk to him, its going to be stressful and I really hope you can be strong and hang in there becos' if you loose it, you're going to loose yourself mentally, him and your son. gd luck
2006-08-15 04:45:31 · answer #10 · answered by LG 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋