I am married for four months now. it was a love marriage against my parents will. but now i want a divorce.?

Question

As it was a marraige against parents will i had to marry in the court. Before he was very nice to me. but now he keeps on abuseing me, keeps on shouting at me for no reasons, use abusevie words and even beats me. Now i have nobody whom I can go to. My parents will not support me. Even after my divorce I have no place to go and stay. But still I want to get rid of this things. i feel as if my whole life has got messed up. Please help Please help.

We had Married as per Hindu Law. He is a Maharshtrian and I am a South Indian.

Will i be able to filr a Divorce? Will I get a divorce?

Answer 1

File for divorce, in the U.S.A., just beeting you, you can have hime put in jail. He will not stop, so divorce him, it will be granted

Answer 2

You took a hasty decision earlier by marrying someone whom your parents did not like. In my opinion you should have waited and bring about consensus for your marriage. That way you would have know him better i.e. through that troublesome time if he stands by you or not.

Anyway, that’s what now happened in the past and you must look forward to the future.

I think 4 months is still a small, very small time to exactly know a person (I am married for 10 years now and still both of us find something new about each other every now and then).

You should give it further time. Initially, it is always difficult to adjust for both the partners. However, as the time goes by, the relationship becomes stronger and you will tend to know what are his likings and what he dislikes, and the vice-versa.

Running away from the situation is not the solution, unless it is so bad that you can't live with it.

It is always said that it takes two to tango. Therefore, you must check your shortcomings as well, while at the same time discuss why he is upset or have changed since he married you.

Problem lies somewhere in between, so must find it and try to cure it.

Regarding your parents, first you took shelter in you man's arm, without thinking about others. Now as the going gets tough you again want shelter from others (your parents this time). When will you stand up and take control of the situations in your own hands? You have to do it if you want to be happy. Give it a serious thought.

Good luck!

Answer 3

You poor thing I wish I could give you advise on the divorce thing...I am not sure if ur in America because its easy here to file for divorce especially in California...really sad though...anyhow I am really sorry that he's that way to you. I know how you feel cuz I am in the same boat...all he does is yell at me and he is always demanding things from me...I know honey its hard but if you dont have kids get out now before you do and you can get a divorce even if you have to live on the streets for awhile then you'll be fine....you can survive women are a lot stronger than men want to believe I think that's why they beat us and demean us because they are afraid of us being better than them.

Answer 4

girl get out while u can. U are to strong to be treated like this. No woman deserves assholes like what u are married too. I was in a abusive relationship. I got to where i had to tell him it was over. I knew if i didnt things would be worse and i would be even more stressed than what i was already because of all the fighting. I have a two year old son who comes first to me no matter what. If i had a place for u. It would be yours already
Isnt to where if ur only married for so long u can get out of the marriage with divorce..
i understand

Answer 5

You seem to be in a mess.
I'm sorry for you and I hope you find a way out and are happy in future.
I have this thing to say......dont you think that you are too hasty in making decisions.First the decision of marriage and now divorce. Life cant go on like this,you have to act more maturely.
Like someone has pointed out, first, find out your mistake in this relationship.......think.
And if your mind is clouded start writing down things........what do you like in him, what do you dislike, how many times have you tried to speak to him , what has been his response....enumerate everything.And then see what is going wrong.
Anyways if you have made up your mind that you ant to end this,then again,wait.
Stay with him till you get a job,work for 5-6 months and earn enough money,find a decent and safe place to live,become independent and then start the divorce procedures.
And who knows in these 4-5 months if you think in the way I have suggested and rectify your shortcommings his behaviour may change and you may not need to take a divorce at all
Good luck and God bless

Answer 6

I'm not sure of your custom laws, but if there is anyway you can get away from that abuse ... you definitely should seek some outside help! Maybe, seek a friend, a religious advisor or move away to another country!

If you have the funds to move... I would move and seek information about how you can divorce ... either on the bases of your country or the country you move to. If you don't plan to go back to your country then there may not be any laws recognizing your marriage, I would find our first before remarrying though.

Take Care and you will be in my prayers!

Answer 7

In four months everything happened in your life and you are ready to take divorce.

OK, Let me analyse few things.

First of all you married a person against your parents will. It is both wrong and right. how? You wanted to marry a person, you married. Never mind the difference in culture. Man is man and woman is woman.
In the first place, ask your self a question. Why you married?
you married because it is nothing but sex attraction. When sex comes first, brain will not work and you cannot think about the consequences.
Why parents are not interested to support you? because, their lack of common sense and logic. In your case, you erred without giving a thought about your future. No parents are bad when it comes to happiness of their children, hence your parents are feeling bad about your decision.
Now, you are facing problem from your husband, he used you and now he is not interested in you.
You can drag him to a court for divorce and ask him to pay alimony. But it takes time, when you go to court. May be for 4 to 5 years. But you have to give evidence to court regarding the ill treatment and misbehaviour by your husband.
You can live separately till you get a divorce and first of all you have to seek a job for your livelihood, if you are having sufficient qualifications. or you will land up as a maid servant. When you come out as a single, you will face sexual harassment from outside people.
But you feel better doing any job instead of daily quarrel with your husband.
In life you cannot adapt via media. Either live with him or leave him to lead an independent life. Be brave and come to a decision.
Sorry to hear your story, but we have to live in this world on hopes. But life is real, short and hence, we have to strive hard to make it sweet.
Good Luck my dear?
What is your age now?

Answer 8

No stay there . MARRIAGE IS WHAT IT IS UNTIL DEATH !!! remember your wedding vows for better and for worse ......... so death do us apart . Don't be a coward & a quiter by getting a divorce like so many are today. Hey my husband is abruseful , I called the police on him and press charge against him . I set up boundries. You need to set boundries with your husband. My husband did not like it what I did , he went into an adultery relationship with my x - best friend 5 years ago. He filed for divorce. I do not believe in divorce because my wedding vows is seriously , meanful and honorable. A vow is a vow . God takes vows very seriously so we should do the same. God is NOT a God of compromise.Well the truth is people only see what they're prepared to see , and like they said , you reap what you sow. Remarry after divorce is adultery so you better not get anyone only when your husband dies than you can get remarry. Life is not consequences. Life is decisions.

Answer 9

I am extremely sorry to hear that all. Love so short lived? Have you tried to know what are the reasons of his such behaviour? Is he involved with another woman? Are you both living separate or with his family? Is there any elder in the house? What have you done to save the marriage? I would suggest you to first try to find out the reason. Then try to talk with him in a polite manner. Don't shout at him. THis i am not telling you to be submissive but I want to control the situation because if both of you would become agressive then who will contain the problem? Be detemined and calm. Ask him what he expected of you and what is not being done... First try my suggestion and if you think right, then tell me the situation by e-mail : [e-mail]
.com
JUST HAVE THE COURAGE AND TRY TO SAVE THE MARRIAGE. GOD WILL HELP YOU. MAY BE I CAN FURTHER ADVISE YOU. GOD BLESS YOU... TREAT ME as your confident friend...

Answer 10

Where do you live? If you are in the U.S. the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1 [phone]; website: http://www.ndvh.org/
There are shelters to give you safe haven, counseling, and programs to get you back on your feet.

Leave right away! Abuse only gets worse. You can file a Police Report even after the fact. The shelter will advise you how to get a restraining order against him. No one deserves to be abused. No one. Your family will understand in time. You will meet new friends and life will improve. Best wishes.

Answer 11

This is more of a comment than an answer. The difference between america and other countries. Most responses from countries other than america are the same. How can you tell a woman that is being abused to stay with him. Most missing or dead people are missing or dead by the hands of their spouses. Do not stay with him. Get a job and get out!! He has no right to abuse you in anyway, mentally or physically. Men are not better then woman and have no rights to abuse them