I've been married 20 years and things are getting worse every day, all she's intrested in is what she can get, I gave her $1,000. to buy her some clothes and she wants more clothes, A new house and A new car. I've been working 16 to 22 hours a day and come home and have to wash towels so I can take A bath, she tries to give people advise about men and says "No damn man is going to tell her what to do". The other night she come beating on the bedroom window at 2:00 am and woke me up to let her in she forgot her keys when she left and I locked the door when I went to bed, the sad part is I don't really care what she was doing, I'm just tired of the same old crap and hope she meets someone so I can begin to live again.
2006-08-13 19:03:53 · 33 answers · asked by Texas A/C 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Oh.I feel sorry for you.My fathers new wife is the same way.And he is so blind to her using the hell out of him.She's in Florida right now with her daughters and he's working doubles so she can get spoiled some more when she gets back.My dad takes her shopping every day and
thinks that he's showing her how much he loves her.And she just takes takes takes.She's a
spoiled bi*ch.I know she doesn't love him because she has to get drunk before they can
you know.She hates me and my sisters and
tries to keep us away from my father.My father
has to buy her daughters all kinds of gifts too.
I hate it because my father didn't raise me right.
He never helped me to learn anything.He wouldn't even teach me how to drive.I feel very
unintelligent.But his wifes daughters are all very smart and they are what my father wanted me and my sisters to be.Sorry off subject.PLease
get yourself a good woman.Love is not about seeing how much you can make your husband buy for you.This woman's a real *****.Please
get a divorce.You need one.And don't worry
there is someone right out there for you.You can find her after you get rid of this gold digger.
2006-08-13 19:23:15 · answer #1 · answered by jenn 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your situation sounds very familiar. You've been married 20 years, and now you say that you don't love each other...and you want to move out of the relationship to start living again.
There are times when you find out that your girl is interested in nothing but your money.
what you should do? First of all breath deeply. think about whose life you 're living. Who is controlling your life.
Love for others or love from others is not eternal...it fades. The only love lasts throughout life is your love towards yourself. Take time towards hobbies, do some good reading, go on vacations...as for your women...if she makes you feel that you are only dollars than you should also make her feel that she is worth only that...not a word more and not a word less. the moment you too 'll start treating her objectively...she'll realise her mistake...if not...be happy 'coz you're free to love yourself.
2006-08-13 19:17:27 · answer #2 · answered by sameer s 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You both are not a compatible pair. Mutual compatibility is the only requirement that cements a marital relationship. I can appreciate your predicament, but having married you can not throw her off with out going into the legal hassles which is not at all a happy experience. But instead of suffering every moment at home why not go for separation; or create a fear in her for divorce if she does not behave herself. She is exploiting you economically, because she lacks self-esteem; and I am sure she can not survive on her own. Threat of divorce may work, please try it!
I am not going into the implication of 'Love' and other aspects since these have no meaning for her. Your problem is marriage with out love between the spouses. Love is a happy consequence of marriage with out which marriage becomes a business with investment and returns. She has reduced her marriage to this status!
2006-08-13 19:12:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love is a condition or phenomenon of emotional primacy, or absolute value. Love generally includes an emotion of intense attraction to either another person, a place, or thing; and may also include the aspect of caring for or finding identification with those objects, including self-love. Love can describe an intense feeling of affection, an emotion or an emotional state. In ordinary use, it usually refers to interpersonal love, an experience usually felt by a person for another person. Love is commonly considered impossible to define.
The concept of love, however, is subject to debate. Some deny the existence of love. Others call it a recently invented abstraction, sometimes dating the "invention" to courtly Europe during or after the middle ages (though this is contradicted by the sizable body of ancient love poetry). Others maintain that love really exists, is not an abstraction, but is indefinable; being a quantity which is spiritual, metaphysical, or philosophical in nature. Some psychologists maintain that love is the action of lending one's "boundary" or "self esteem" to another. And others attempt to define love and apply the definition to everyday lif
2006-08-13 19:06:15 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs. J 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That was me a few years ago, then i grew up. I was like that to my husband. I was like"No man is gonna tell me what to do. I am sooo hot and hes not that hot and i can get anyone so he better do it." And id act like a man. Id go out drinking and come home at 3am, talk to him like crap...the whole 9 yards. Thenone night, i threw my wedding ring at him cause i was drunk and lost it. Well, that was a turning point fo me. I NEVER acted that way again and i appriciated him ever since. Its been 3 years and when i look back i thought how bad it must have been for him. hes my baby and ill never go back to that. if she doesnt change, you need to leave her and scare the crap out of her ***! Noones that cute. yo dont have a marrige. Youll get tired of it soon and be like buh bye.
2006-08-13 19:10:22 · answer #5 · answered by Baby Jack born 4/5/09 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Was she like this before or has this been escalating with time? it sounds like she is taking so many things for granted. One thing to consider is just changing your behavior a bit so that it is not what she expects, and see how she reacts. And the fact that you are more than willing to see her leave seems to indicate that you would rather be with someone who is more appreciative. you can always try and steer her in that direction. She might be feeling the same way.
The comment of "no man is going to tell her what to do" would signal to me that she has some serious issues from her childhood.
2006-08-13 19:09:22 · answer #6 · answered by soulblazer28 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When someone asks you if you've ever been in love and you answer, "I think so," then you haven't been in love. You know you're in love when you're in love. I thought I was in love after I got dumped by my ex-girlfriend. It took me like two years to realize that I was in love but then I recently realized I think I was just infatuated with her and the fact that she was infatuated with me...for a while. I feel for you man, but damn, being single sucks. I'm 26 and haven't been on a date since I was 20. But it really sounds like you're beyond depressed here. You're fed up and just don't care. Am I right?
2006-08-13 19:10:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It definitely sounds like she could care less about anything but herself. I think you need to move on, she will probably try to get you for everything your worth once you two seperate, if you do seperate. I've been divorced for about 10 yrs. and I won't get married again, it's not worth it. I would run not walk to the divorce lawyer. When it's over it's over! Good luck!!!
2006-08-13 19:09:45 · answer #8 · answered by allyson 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love:
According to 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV), love is characterised by the following:
Patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast, not proud, not rude,
not self-seeking, not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs,
does not delight in evil, rejoices with the truth, protects, trusts,
hopes, perseveres, never fails.
If you find it hard to describe love, or whether you are loving to
your spouse, children, parents, relatives, friends, neighbours,
brothers, sisters, colleagues at work; ask yourself these questions:
Am I patient with them? Am I not selfish in my dealings with them?
Am I kind (be it in the way I speak or serve) with them? Am I not
rude?
What is my attitude towards them?
Do I rejoice when something evil or bad has happened to them?
When my spouse (or boss, brother, sister, friend etc) advises or
corrects me and I realized that it is true – Do I rejoice with the
truth and accept it? Or is my response unkind, rude, etc.?
Am I easily angered when I have been wronged? And do I keep a record of such wrongs?
Do I find myself ridiculing / making fun / bringing down my spouse or friend (especially in public) or do I seek to protect him or her.
We abuse the word "love" – we use it often, and practice it less.
The Bible is very practical and has great answers to issues of life – it is the Word of God. Here are a few other verses on love:
"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth". 1 John 3:18 (NIV)
"Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love" 1 John 4:8 (NIV)
"If anyone says `I love God' yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For
anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen." 1 John 4:20 (NIV)
2006-08-13 19:13:43 · answer #9 · answered by vusimhl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love is when she's interested in you even if you don't give her money. Love is sharing the responsibilities to make your partner happy. It sounds like you love her but she doesn't love you.
But you've got 20 years into this! Love is seeing a marriage counselor to at least try to save your marriage.
2006-08-13 19:05:27 · answer #10 · answered by Randy Marsh 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋