Low self-esteem is a big problem for me?

Question

I have a very low esteem. This has become a serious problem with me over the past several years. I can hardly trust people because of it. I think that people are always looking down on me. I feel like people are talking about how ugly I am. Because of I my low self-esteem problem, I tend to over think everything. I have pantic attacks because of it. I think that all of this my go back to childhood. This is something that I am now trying to overcome. If anyone has any questions, e-mail me and please feel free to ask . I need some help.

Answer 1

My heart goes out to you. I bought a book of positive affirmations and read it everyday without fail. It worked. Don't hang around negative people. When someone gives you a compliment, own it. Say thank you and accept it as the truth. Pat yourself verbally on the back with everything you accomplish during the day. Audit the way that you think. Whenever you start to think something negative about yourself, push that thought away and think of your strengths. You can do this! It just takes practice And don't be afraid to go to counseling. It can make a world of difference.

Answer 2

Well,I don't know how will you take my answer but I can make you sure that if you follow what I say to you it will definitely help you.
Everything comes in habit.You start to say yourself you are the greatest of all .May be it will make you feel how could you do when you know you are not and it is almost making fool yourself.

Forget everything,because you tried everything.You start doing it dont try to self esteem some time go with this and when ever you will do that one question will come from your inside How can you say that.You prove it by any way wrong or right no matter.If you dont find any reason then say-I dont have any reason but even though I am the greatest of all.Never compare yourself to anyone bcoz you are doing good on your place.When you see other people is doing better then you then you dont need to change your way bcoz might be you ware doing better then them.Just believe you are the best.

Answer 3

I know that it may be hard, but the first step is to feel better about yourself! Everyone is beautiful in their own way, and there are people that I may have found fairly unattractive can be the most sought after and most popular female. It is not always how you look, but your personality that makes people gravitate towards you. If you feel badly about yourself, others perceive that also. This may not work for everyone, but being pampered sometimes makes me feel better if I am having a bad day and feeling bad about yourself. Get your nails done, buy a new outfit, or go to a nice salon and let them give you a hair make-over! It sounds so simple, but I know that it can be very difficult! But until you deal with the feelings that you have deep inside you, you can not move forward with relationships with others. DON"T focus so much on what other people think either! How you feel about yourself is most important, boo! Keep your head up, and despite how crazy it may sound, getting a pet such as a dog, often does wonders to the self-esteem!

Answer 4

I have the same problem as you. I hope it makes you feel better not to feel so alone with this problem.

You wrote "I feel like people are talking about how ugly I am." You feel ugly so you have transferred this feeling to other people. Now, please help me out. Take a good look at yourself in the mirror. Believe me, you have some nice features. Is it your eyes (i.e. big, beautiful, special color), is it your skin (clear, luminous) is it your nose (great character, cute), is it your mouth (small, full, sensuous) Anyway, you get the idea. If it's not your face, maybe you have a good body or a beautiful smile. Find something in your appearance to like, to love.

You wrote "I think that people are always looking down on me." Remember whatever you think people are doing, it's really your inside voice projecting that on to other people as you say because of your low self esteem. Try to tell yourself, there is no reason for people to look down on you - if for no other reason, that people are too busy thinking about their own insecurities to concentrate on you (yes other people have low self esteem too or other problems as well). Tell yourself you are just as good as other people and maybe in some respects, better. Think about your good points in your character - are you kind, giving, caring, person, if so, this is the most important thing in life and give yourself a great, big pat on the shoulder.

You wrote "Because of I my low self-esteem problem, I tend to over think everything. I have pantic attacks because of it. I think that all of this my go back to childhood."

I understand this to mean that you analyze everything and I understand what you mean because I am the same. Well, give yourself another pat on the back because you understand the problem very well - low self esteem and childhood. Now, we cannot change the past, but it's a good idea to understand the past and then try to move forward - don't live in the past. Tell yourself, I understand that my childhood experiences hurt me, I am hurt as a result, but I am going to progress with my life anyway and do the best I can.

It's possible that you may need professional help - don't be afraid to get it, if you think it will help you - there's no shame in it - it doesn't mean your crazy. It just means you need help with your problem so you can get the most out of your life.

I hope you take everything I say well because when I am talking to you, I am also talking to myself - I've been there and to be honest, I'm still there - it's a lifelong process, journey, job, to deal with who you are and how you got to be that way, and to be the best you that you can be.

Good luck!

Answer 5

How old are you?
I've gone through times of low self-esteem and very high self-esteem. It's the ups and downs of life. I'll you that the time I felt the best about myself was during basic training for the Air Force. It was amazing! I felt so good about myself for everything that I accomplished.
If you need more suggestions e-mail me, or if you just want to talk because you need a friend. It feels to help people.

In the mean time, cheer up.

Answer 6

Self-esteem issues do tend to go back to childhood. They can either be transfered via genetic vulnerability or most likely through the environment in which one is raised. For instance, one can either unconsciously mimick the behaviour of a parent, as all children are influenced by their parents and families with whom the are raised, or self-esteem issues might originate due to the behaviour we are exposed to in early childhood by certain influencial characters. Self-esteem issues can be dealt with if one understands why he/she reacts in acertain way to certain situations, based on the understanding of where this behaviour comes from. You are most likely not ugly at all and noone looks down on you. If you do tend to get that feeling, it might be because your self-esteem issues become evident through your body language and appearence, making it easier for people to view you as 'weak'. Once you understand where this behaviour comes from, you need to work on gainning confidence and portraying a more confident 'self' to the world. If you portray confidence, people will not judge you as easily. Perhaps you should consult a therapist or psychologist in assisting you in finding our the root of the self-esteem problem and then perhaps adopting a humanistic approach in building your confidence, or even a cogitive-behavioural approach. Don't ever put yourself down, no matter what you may think other people think. There's always a solution to everything that will make you feel good about yourself and gain confidence.

Answer 7

Did one or both of your parents criticize you a lot? That could be part of the cause. I used to have this problem, and I don't know what cured it other than time. High self esteem isn't all that it's cracked up to be though. Studies show people with high self esteem are insensitive and more likely to be bullies. Aim to have medium self esteem- a realistic self image based on your unique abilities and achievements. No matter what, remember God loves you and created you perfect!

Answer 8

first, be healthy. Take a bcomplex vitamin twice a day. exercise, get sunlight...this will do wonders for you.
Read "Reviving Ophelia: saving the selves of adolescent girls" it talks about girls with low self esteem and their "overconsciousness" of people, always paranoid that poeple are talking about them when in fact ... those people are completely oblivious.

Answer 9

i am so like you..... in fact lets both help each other....i hope i can support and help you anyway i can

what i would do is to calm down and think for a minute

talk to someone that can make you feel better

take this as advice, expect the unexpected, because tomorrow is another day

and by my philosophy...if life stabs you, put on the bandage and move on....take it step by step

good luck namaste

also...listen to "who knows" by avril lavigne

Answer 10

The first step is in knowing. The second is in trying to improve it. below are sites that may help guide you:-) Good Luck it's a common problem, especially in young people.