We've talked a lot about her suspicions but she still thinks the world of him. All our friends think he is playing away (there's a lot of evidence to suggest this) so how do we tell her clearly we think her suspicions are right? Or do we not say anything at all?
2006-08-13 07:39:43 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
first of all. it is very risky. you don't want your best friend to go against you. secondly, it is a serious problem. make sure you have the right information or proof that there is a cheating husband. if you found the right ones, you have the option of telling it to your best friend. honesty is the best policy. tell her that even if it breaks your heart, you are her friend and you wanted to be honest. she might not take the news, but hey. after you tell her the problem, she will do what's best for her. if she doesn't want to believe you, it's ok. but let me tell you this: this is a huge thing to deal with. better think first before you fire your weapon. talk to the cheating husband. then if he tries to compromize. dnt accept it yet. tell him that he should be the one who talks, not you. it's their problem anyway..
so yea i hope i could help..
2006-08-13 07:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by griever24seven 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't say anything to her on this, and here's why: you never know how someone will process information like that. Many is the time a well-meaning friend has taken it upon themselves to give news like that only to have it turn out badly. Either they were completely wrong about what they "thought" they knew, or worse, they were right, and the response they received was akin to "killing the messenger", thereby harming the friendship, because this is an emotionally charged issue for people...you never know how they'll react. ( I swear, sometimes they'll look at conclusive proof that even Stevie Wonder could see and stay with a cheater anyway...sometimes people are in denial for their own reasons, and are not ready to accept the truth; they certainly can't be forced into it.) What can be done ( if you feel strongly enough about it) is confronting the suspected cheater with your suspicions and threatening to tell your friend about it if they don't. This is a ploy designed to force their hand and determine if they have any sense of a conscience or not. Mind you, this is a hollow threat...if it doesn't work ( and it may not) under no circumstances tell your friend anyway. It's far from a perfect solution, but it's about the best you can do and keep your friendship in tact. Beyond that, just be there for your friend when the illusion inevitably comes crashing to the ground. Good luck.
2006-08-13 07:56:23 · answer #2 · answered by Captain S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like it's difficult for her to face the truth, because then that will mean she and her husband will have to get into some of the deeper questions as to why they're having this problem in the first place.
Try to get some evidence, and then send an anonymous note w the evidence, as in "...your suspicions are true..." or "...thought you would want to know the truth...".
Sometimes a spouse knows that something's going on, but decides not to confront the other person, simply because of fear. Let her decide how she wants to handle it, and support her. Don't treat like she's dumb for not confronting him.
2006-08-13 08:11:25 · answer #3 · answered by Joya 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure how to tee her,but you should.Get all your girl friend's together for a gab-fest.Have a couple of "Toddy's",loss-en up thing's,and then cut loose with the facts.I don't want her to go through the pain,but the pain is much worse if she find's out while being alone.Please be ready to give her all your support.She will need all her friend's more than ever!Your doing the right thing.It's what I would want,wouldn't you?Hang in there.
2006-08-13 07:54:19 · answer #4 · answered by Wishee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't tell her go to him and ask? If you know for sure and if you do then you tell him to tell her and if not you will be more than happy to tell your b/f that her husband is cheating and in which case he will prombaly not tell her he will find something wrong with you and tell he not to hang out with you my point is either way you go you are gonna be the bad guy even though you did nothing wrong but try to help your friend?
2006-08-13 07:48:20 · answer #5 · answered by littlebitty06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're a freak! would GOD have mercy on your soul for even questioning like that. would you want to your spouse to handle you that way in case you cheated? by utilising the way...different halves or husbands for that rely are no longer assets!!!! no longer something and no person is rightfully each and every physique's yet their very own. my own physique is rightfully MINE.(and GOD"S). no person elses.
2016-11-04 12:16:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't tell her. Unless you have concrete proof. Stay out of their marriage unless you want to lose a best friend. The best think you can do is be there for her if she finds out he is really cheating.
2006-08-13 07:54:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't tell her what your suspicion are, it's just speculation.
She needs to hire a private detective. They do cost, but if you really want to know, then do it.
2006-08-13 07:48:17 · answer #8 · answered by joe-dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know....for sure...tell her an enabler is jsut as bad as the cheater!!!! But make sure you are there to back her up in a positive manner, and support her in her choices even if you think her choices are wrong.
2006-08-13 07:44:28 · answer #9 · answered by hairstyle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her. Catch him in the act by getting a vechical he doesn't know and get a video camra and follow him around then go up to her when u have footage and telll her she needs to watch it.
2006-08-13 07:46:45 · answer #10 · answered by wemsamandab93 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋