Does seperation always lead to divorce?

Question

My husband cam to me two weeks ago, and claimed he didn't want to be married anymore. We have two children, and I have been a stay at home mom for four years.( This was a mutual decision.) I am trying to leave out my emotions when we do communicate, but they are all over my face. I cannot hide. He has been gone for two weeks now, and there has been no change. I have NO where to go for shelter, and he is using this against me when the kids come into conversation. Is there anyone on my side? Is there anyone out there that puts kids and moms first? I feel so betrayed and judged by something I thought we both agreed on. He is a truck driver and is gone most of the time anyway. I'm sure this brings many oppurtunities, but I can't believe someone would be so mean and cruel. Please help me!

Answer 1

You and the kids stay in the house, and go to court and make him stay out. file for separation, and then he will have to let you stay there. he will have to support you until you can get a job, and things. Separations do not always lead to divorce, but most of the time they do, and usually the one wanting to go the other way, has found someone else. Talk to a lawyer and find out how to go about all of this, the courts will not put the mother and kids out in the street so that a truck driver can leave an empty house sitting there while he is out.

Answer 2

firstly let him leave and see a attorney being that you are stay at home mom you are entitled to child support and possibly alimony that will wake him up that you will not be bullied by him or manipulated.Don't let him used the children to get at you after all they are with you and not him and being a full time truck driver he has no time to raise kids. Most states require a 1year seperation before a divorce can be finalized so in this time seek counseling and do what is best for you and the children even if it means making him pay to help out with the blessings he helped to create. DON"T BE BULLIED

Answer 3

Sweetie, you need to take a deep breath and relax for a second. First of all you mentioned separation....honey, skip that. If he came right out and said that he didn't want to be married anymore...he doesn't and he's not even going to try to make things better. Counseling is only going to tear your heart out and he'll use it against you once he finds a weak spot. I know it's hard, but he's already made up his mind and you are going to have to accept that. Go down to your local courthouse and file for divorce yourself. You can do this pro-se, (without an attorney). This will guarantee you the house for now. Even if it's his. The courts focus on the children and what is best for them. So ignore is idle threats of kicking you out of "his" house...it's just not going to happen. The key to this is filing first and I cannot stress that enough. And here's a bonus he probably hasn't thought about. By mutual agreement, you've been the homemaker and haven't earned any income. The courts are going to take that into consideration and either he's going to be ordered to pay maintenance (spousal support) or they'll order him to make the house payments while you continue to live there....ask for it, you've earned it. And as for his cruelty, believe in Karma, and thank your lucky stars it's over sooner than later when you have so much more invested in this. You are going to have to chalk it up as a learning experience for the sake of your children and move on. It may seem like you need the strength of God to do this, but if it's the right thing, you'll have that strength. God never gives us anything we can't handle.

Answer 4

I agree with the others in here. Get yourself a job. Don't be dependent on him. It may be something you both agreed on mutually, but it sounds like circumstances have changed. I'm sorry that this happened to you, but you need to move forward for your own sake and the sake of the kids. Don't hang around and wait for him to change his mind.

If you live in a state that has alimony, make use of that. Get a lawyer and make him take care of you till you can take care of yourself. But don't use that to not take care of yourself. Even if you don't live in a state that provides alimony, there is something called a separate maintainence agreement. A lawyer can help you with that too. And basically what it means is, your husband will not only have to pay child support, but during your separation he will be ordered to pay a certain court ordered amount to help you take care of yourself.

Don't waste any time, doesn't sound like he did. Do what you need to do to take care of you and the kids. There is life after him and it's time for you to go find it.

Answer 5

Separation and divorce are almost the same. Fight both of them, be faithful to your partner. This applies to only married couples. If you are not married don't have affairs with someone else unless you are married. Come to Jesus He will change and show you the way to handle relationships.

Be pure and holy, get married to one spouse when you are ready, no sex till you tied the knot afterwards remain faithful to him or her. True marriage is one woman one man anything else is pervasion and avoid, after you married don't separate or divorce ask God to give you true love for that spouse.

Don't beat each other or queral solve misundustergings mikably.

Forgive each other and be quckly to say Iam sorry ssebo or nyabo. Ekibi mwe abakozesa neteno mugera buli kyemwagala. But live lives pleasing to God.

Answer 6

That happens everyday and is called life. He got you good, now it is your turn, get him for all he has, he betrayed you, and now wants to make you feel guilty, don't fall for it, leave the kids out of conversations, get a lawyer and take the gloves off, and yes...he can be so mean and cruel, remember that when push comes to shove

Answer 7

I'm so sorry. Your feet have been placed on a path I'm sure you never thought you'd have to walk.

If you were just trying to work through some problems there would be a chance. But he has already told you he no longer wants to be married to you.

Seek legal counsel IMMEDIATELY. One specializing in Family Law. You need to protect those babies of yours. They need their home. Don't move out, don't leave your children, that would be seen as abndonment & you would lose them.

Answer 8

First off, you may consider trying to go to work so you will have income and food on the table for you and the kids.

Next, if he truly wants to call it quits with you, I advice you to find a good attorney and get everything possible out of him.

I am sorry for your predicament. It is such a sad situation when these things happen. I truly wish you good luck and I know everything will work out for you. Always remember: something good always come out of something bad.

Answer 9

Marriage breakup is a very difficult predicament to deal with. You have practically shared everything together. To his defense, at least he has been honest with you, and told you to you face. It could be worse, you could have caught him in bed with someone else. Do you have any family/friends that live close by. Think of this as a new beginning. A beginning that allows you to now do the things you have always wanted to.

Answer 10

My Dear, I know you're still in shock,but you need a Lawyer.NOW!!! Your husband does not want to be married to you anymore. FINE! He can still give you support checks!!!! Hurry before he spends all the money on his oochie! He more than likely has one. Fight back. Stay calm and don't let your emotions out in front of him.