My husband has started talking to females again online after he promised me he woulldn't, he didn't eevn tell them he was married or had kids, made plans to meet up with these girls or woman, what should i do, i have seen converstions, I check his messenger archives, when I con front him, he says he didn't say those things, any advice, for the 3rd time around?
2006-08-13 03:03:03 · 23 answers · asked by crazy2have3kids 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you have been a very forgiving person and the trust in your relationship obviously isn't there if you have been checking his archives which is only natural after what has happened.Cheating is Cheating online or not. I think you should leave him because he obviously has no regard for you and your children and what he is doing to you all considering he is denying to people he talks to that you exist. If you have a printer then print the conversations and show him then he can't deny it when there is the hard evidence staring him in the face. You deserve someone who will love you and be commited to you. I know sometimes it is easier to stay in a failed relationship because its what you know and its hard to start all over especially with children but it will be worth it in the end. Remember you are a person to and you have the right to be happy.
2006-08-13 03:10:34 · answer #1 · answered by gypsywife2b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is lying to you, if you found hard evidence to prove he really did it. You have two choices. First of all you can chose to let this break you up. Since you have broken up twice before, it won't mean much to him because he knows you will take him back. If you leave him this time, make it permanent. He is only going to change if you do the second choice, and here it is.
Second, if you want to keep him around you need to talk to him. Show him what you found in the archives and tell him you know he is lying. Tell him that you want to stay together so you think that you and him should both chat with these women together. Tell him that you will be willing to do anything to keep the marriage intact, even if it's fulfilling some of his fantasies. Beware, if you tell him you are willing to do stuff like this, he will be expecting you to follow through. Eventually he will stop looking for other women on line and want to do more things with you. When you talk to him about all of this, you can't get upset. You have to be open and honest and cheerful or he won't believe you. Be Polite. Good Luck
2006-08-13 03:13:18 · answer #2 · answered by marks3kids 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've gone through this recently.......he did it once and i forgave, second time, he came home with his stuff on the front lawn, the computer and a note saying, i was starting divorce proceedings the next day, the kids would stay with me, and i was taking everything from him that meant something to him. He didn't love me or the kids enough to come to me...LIKE A MAN...and say it wasn't working out, or that he wasn't happy. He chose to get on line and look for something better, so he can keep his something better and leave me and the kids alone. Get on his puter and print all the conversations hes had with this person , so when and if you do go to court u have proof he was cheating on you. For all the ppl thinking maybe i wasn't given him attention or something and maybe that's why he left....no such thing, his excuse was " i needed for someone else to tell me i still got it, other then you". Childish and dumb excuse huh?
2006-08-13 03:54:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's obviously lying because conversations don't just appear in an archive. Sounds to me like he wants to get caught or something. If I was doing something like that I would erase the archives etc so that it was undetectable !
He is showing a total lack of respect and you need to decide if you want to continue being married to a liar and who knows what else !!
2006-08-13 03:09:46 · answer #4 · answered by JiminyCricket 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
!!!DON'T DO THIS AGAIN!!!! IF HE CHEATED 3 TIMES YOUR DONE LADY HE DON'T LOVE OR WANT YOU..... i can't believe your not devorced yet what he hell are you waitting for??? I know what it is..... your hopeing he will change, just like magic, and be the man you want and the father your kids need. right???? ""HELLO""""" some guys are not good father or husband material, get that through your head. you picked a loser didn't you. and made babies with him. you scewed up. get out take the kids live with family, and raise your kid as best you can hit him with child support and when they ask and they will tell them that you made a very bad choice in picking a guy to be there father and that your sorry, but you love them very much.
PS remember, kids learn from there parents by what they see in there home. abuse, cheating, drinking, smoking, fighting, weakness, fears, get the picture lady don't be the wrong example for them to learn from be there mother and protect them. do what is best for them not you. even if you have to be without a husband. do whats best for your kids mom.
2006-08-13 03:22:16 · answer #5 · answered by 4stringthndr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Mrs 3 Strikes you obviously have never heard of the term 3 strikes and your out. This guy is a lying bastard to put it mildly. Thanks to the net divorce rates are up because alot of people are now able to commit infidelities in their relationships thanks to the net it is the devils tool. You need to toss it out for starters or him. You and the Children don't diserve to live in a 3 ring circus with no stability. So get some self respect and tell him it will no longer be tolerated ( child supports sucks and a doubt he wants to have to pay it ). My fiancee has raised 3 beautiful girls on his own until he met me because of something similar to this.
2006-08-13 04:43:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
THIRD time around??...once a fool shame on you, twice a fool shame me...are you getting the picture here?
He's a LIAR and a CHEAT...dump him. He will only bring you misery and possibly a sexually transmitted disease....life will go on without him girlfriend.
Oh and if I was you, I'd bash the **** out the computer with a bat as he sits tap, tap, tapping at it...that ought to give him the picture...put that bat three inches from his head and my guess is he'll start to re-consider.
And do what gypsy wife said...PRINT IT OUT and put it in safe keeping at a bank or something....it will help you in court when you go for a divorce to have actual proof of his cheating.
2006-08-13 03:09:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, why is there a third time around?
Oh, you have kids, well that makes it OK to stay in a miserable home for their sake. They will never guess how miserable and loveless your marraige is. I'm sure it has nothing to do with your insecurity (or his) so just stay where you are and stop whining.
2006-08-13 03:08:47 · answer #8 · answered by n2bateyou2000 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why is it the 3rd time around? Because you keep forgiving him and "trying" to make things work? The more you take him back, the worse it will get. Sorry, I have no advice...it would have taken me one time to be rid of him.
2006-08-13 03:37:53 · answer #9 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been guilty of doing this at one time but I did it because she was not paying attention to me and when that happens, I got smart and went elsewhere. So, are you paying attention to him or maybe done something to change his mind then if so then its something that you need to deal with but if you are in the clear then kick his *** to the curb cause 3 times is 3 times too many.
2006-08-13 03:14:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋