I do tend to talk much and he is a friend. He often repeated in publict that he will rape me if I don't shut up! I took that for a joke of course... do you think I should be worried?
He acted a bit aggressive towards me last time when he was drunk, I didn't expect that behavior on his side... should I be worried?
We haven't talked much, since... do you think I should be worried about something? He moved away to another town since two weeks and I was trying to get into contact to let him know that, after all, nothing happened between us and I hope we are still friends as before... he is not answering!
Is that a good sign, or a bad one? Did I make any mistake here?
He wanted to lay me, acted a bit too aggressively, and I said NO, especially because I knew for sure that he has a girlfriend, plus that he was drunk!!!
Is that friendship over now? Will he be my enemy, from now on?
Did I make any mistake here?
Help!!!!!
2006-08-12 21:00:38 · 42 answers · asked by Hibernating Ladybird 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
No shelly_cute, let me specify. He didn't attack me, but he wanted to lay me, and there was some hussle, sure, since he was drunk. He didn't start attacking or so, no..... but it was weird, whatsoever!
2006-08-12 21:06:50 · update #1
I always wonder why if one is a victim of such a behavior on the side of another, why do they blame it on the victim insead of the harasser... why do you guys blame it on me???
2006-08-12 22:47:00 · update #2
I am talking about the answer of think kam right now! Yes-yes! What "sexually deviant behavior"? That is not true.
I didn't tell anybody I want to rape them, I didn't risk anybody's health, and caused no injury to anyone!
That cannot be said about him.
He almost drove me into a car in the middle of the night, on the wrong side of the road!!!!!
2006-08-12 22:52:28 · update #3
He sounds like a psycho. Stay away from him. Why would you want to associate with someone like that?
2006-08-12 21:02:19 · answer #1 · answered by Dori 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well be grateful that you lost this guy that you called 'friend'. I think that a real friend don't even joke about raping you nor in public not even in private. I think he showed you exactly what he wanted with you when he was drunk. He wanted you to lay down. He wanted to rape you. Be grateful that he left forever because if he was a little bit more aggressive i think he could have done it under the spell of alcohol. Under the influence of alcohol he showed you what he really wanted. YOu didn't do a mistake....you did what was right to be done.
2006-08-12 21:08:19 · answer #2 · answered by Ant ;-) 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well obviously you are worried because you are asking this question.
If you even have to question whether or not you are worried about this person then you probably shouldn't bother with them.
However since you haven't been talking lately and you are still thinking about contacting him, perhaps you have a desire to be raped?
Did it turn you on when he says he'll rape you?
Honestly?
I think this may be more complicated than you are leading on.
You are obviously conflicted. Part of you is worried and is looking for someone to tell you to stay away from this person.
Another part of you feels the void now that this aggrressive, perhaps sexually deviant influence has been removed from your life.
The idea of friends should be people that you are comfortable around, people you can at least somewhat depend on. If you are worried about a "friend" raping you, maybe you should consider being more careful about who you call friend.
But then perhaps you are sexually deviant as well.
.
2006-08-12 21:41:55 · answer #3 · answered by think_kam 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First,it's not your fault.You didn't do anything wrong.Since he moved to another town,I wouldn't be worried that much but I would tell a parent,a freind or even a police officer that he repeatedally said he was going to rape you.Now you may think that you don't wanna get him in trouble.You won't.He will get himself in trouble by saying what he did.As far as the "friendship" goes,forget about him and move on.Friends don't tell other freinds that they are going to rape themWhy would you want this psycho as a freind anyway?Sounds like he has some major issues.He needs to be stopped.He's going to say that to another girl while drunk and may actually rape her.This creep needs to be stopped and possibly in jail.You don't threaten someone with rape.
2006-08-12 21:09:03 · answer #4 · answered by the_silver_tin_man 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thank goodness he's gone. People will sometimes give you clues before they do something drastic. That was your clue. Don't worry about it. Not enemies, not friends. People are in our lives for a season, a reason or a lifetime. Your season is over and thank the Lord you didn't get hurt.
Now let's try and see if you can start to listen more and talk less. That is your clue when he told you to be quiet. God gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason. Slow down and really listen okay?
2006-08-12 21:05:35 · answer #5 · answered by Ponderpink 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You didn't do anything wrong. Stay away from this loser and don't call again. I know you say you were friends but friends don't threaten rape, don't get sexually aggressive, don't use their friends to cheat on their girlfriend.
I think his not answering is a good sign. It shows that he is less likely to stalk you or attack you. Just be careful and don't let friends do this stuff to you.
2006-08-12 21:07:57 · answer #6 · answered by Kuji 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you didn't make a mistake , If hes not responding ,don't call him. Let him go. Joking about rape is not a joke. Being intoxicated can bring some deep to the core feelings out. So if rape was one of his,stay clear.
2006-08-12 21:07:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've learned that when people tell you who they are and what they want, you MUST believe them. Even when it seems bizarre, dangerous, stupid or very different from the way you think.
Your enemy.(he was never your friend) means it when he said he will rape you - he is not joking. He believes you are teasing him and asking for it.
He has already ended the friendship - that's how men behave when they're no longer interested.
If you persist in seeing him, he will rape you and harm you in the process. He has already warned you and he has shown you too.
Good luck, Stay safe.
2006-08-12 21:25:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would let him alone especially if he is not returning your calls. It sounds like all he wanted was you know what. It does sound like a bit of trouble so let him alone. He is only your enemy if he comes back around. The only thing you did wrong is try to contact him after he moved away. Just let him alone, so he won't hurt you, but let someone close know what happened.
2006-08-12 21:06:18 · answer #9 · answered by Angels Of The Arts 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keep away from this creep or he will rape you next time
he is drunk and his real nature comes out. This guy is
not a real friend and you should get the hint from his past
acts. You will put yourself in a dangerous situation if you
keep thinking he is any sort of friend, esp. if you know he
has a girlfriend already but tried to put the moves on you.
Keep yourself safe, keep away.
2006-08-12 21:05:40 · answer #10 · answered by Caiman94941 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
this is not funny sun.its something that shouldnt be said even as a joke.the only mistake u did was to take it easy when it was first said.u should have objected.besides that guy seems to have a major problem too.even u need to see a psychiatrist if u feel strongly about this.dont try to contact him.leave it as it is.give sometime.lose him if its doing u harm but dont lose urself.
2006-08-12 21:21:25 · answer #11 · answered by archie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋