I have always maintained that i wanted to do this even since we first started dating. At that time she said she was ok with it but that it was just a bit too soon in the relationship, which i agreed with. As time has passed her attitude has changed and she now despises the idea. This something that is really important to me. I would never cheat on her or force her into it. I know i should just get over it but i cant seem to. I really just want give it a go even if only once!
A few facts to complicate things:
*We are engaged
*Have 2 Kids
*She is very insecure
*I am 21 she is only 19
and the biggie....
We have had a threesome before(lots alcohol) but with another guy which she says she regrets and it was "gross" but body language doesn't lie too well. I have never hassled her about this or used it to get "my turn"
I know it seems silly but having a ffm threesome is hugely important to me. Should I give up or persist. Am I wrong to feel like she is havin double standards?
??
2006-08-12 19:52:10 · 15 answers · asked by brentmcassidy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
GEEZ dont you people read, talk about attacking me! She enjoyed it when she did it just regreted it the next day and has admited it. The deal is she says and does different things. I think she is totally fine with new sexual experiences just so long as she is the one enjoying it not me. Envy or jeasouly i dont know. She has a ball when ever she wants flirts etc. and i dont complain, sometimes i do point out the hypocracy though.
And the point of marriage is not monogamy i beleive but to be a team and to make each other happy with your own set of rules (to within reason) for your own collective lives. And what im saying is i feel like there is 2 sets of rules at my place!! And i wonder whether i should give up on equality, continue to wait for it, or fight for it.
2006-08-12 21:08:02 · update #1
Since she's already tried it and didn't like it, you have to stop bugging her about it. You also have to consider that this issue may crop up again when you're married. It sounds like you will always want it and she may never want it again. You better work on this issue now before you get hitched or else there will be problems later on.
2006-08-12 20:01:58 · answer #1 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I find it totally disrespectful of you to keep insisting upon something that makes your wife uncomfortable and something she says she does NOT want to do. I would feel humiliated, hurt, rejected and inadequate if my husband tried to insist on such a thing. The point of marriage is that you are saying to your partner, You are so valuable to me that I choose to forgo every other body in order to have you alone. That is the point of marriage - monogamy.
You say she is insecure; so, why are you making her more insecure by sending messages that tell her she is inadequate? Perhaps there's a reson why she's insecure - her husband keeps trying to make her do something she doesn't want to do, and is making her feel totally not good enough.
She doesn't have double standards, you do. What's more important - your wife's self-esteem and confidence and your happy marriage, or having a bunch of bodies in bed with you? Where on earth are your priorities?
2006-08-12 20:38:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
In concept, it sounds appealing. interior the top it wreaks havoc on the relationship. As a guy, getting some added unusual could be large, yet having yet another guy violate your spouse could make me insane. Afterwards, you generally question what you probably did. I somewhat have in simple terms prevented all of it together. Like i want extra distress in my existence.
2016-10-02 00:34:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lots of alcohol doesn't count. You must be fully aware of what you are doing. And if she was turned off, and never want to be in that situation again. Your going to have to suck it up and get over it. As for her being insecure, are you shure your not bulling her to much about it. Relax, being ingaged or marred doesn't mean you have to not except how she feels.
2006-08-12 20:13:11 · answer #4 · answered by crafty 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you just got the short ind of the stick.
or did you get the long end of the stick the last time you had your threesome, maybe thats why your girl friend was grossed out when you and your boyfriend were
spooning.
2006-08-12 20:04:35 · answer #5 · answered by michael p 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she was willing at first, but when your relationship escalated, perhaps she didn't want to share you.
You need to decide which is more important to you, the threesome or her. And you should just drop it when she says NO!
2006-08-12 19:56:34 · answer #6 · answered by Lady J 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give up the dream. Alot of women hate to share. You need to decide if this fantasy or your fiance is more important to you since you're not going to get both.
2006-08-12 19:56:02 · answer #7 · answered by Kanga_tush2 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
BS its hugely important to you! Its just your dick for pities sake! Growup! You should have quit persisting the first time she said no and you have no business having kids!
2006-08-12 20:59:22 · answer #8 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I guess you'll have to either supress it or get a new woman. Pressuring her into it would make you a major asshole.
2006-08-12 20:01:03 · answer #9 · answered by pisceswoman87 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well if she says she regrets it dont push maybe she will change her mind
2006-08-12 19:55:27 · answer #10 · answered by fetter_2004 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋