I find that many people I encounter are so much less the people than I imagined or expected them to be. What is it? Am I an elitist egomaniac or an alien or what?
Thanks
2006-08-12 18:49:24 · 12 answers · asked by Sereny 3 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
I love you.
2006-08-17 01:09:34 · answer #1 · answered by matthew_holmes2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, I'm not going to spend half an hour rewording your question so that it gets at the kind of information that you really want. Also, I'm going to assume that you're serious about wanting to have a different circle of friends.
So, here goes.
"People of quality" may be judged by any number of standards, religious, value systems, acquaintances, and so forth. Basically, some of your previous respondants are correct. The fact is that you'll fit in with those people who accept you. So, the question to be asked is "How can I make myself more acceptable to the kind of people whom I'd like to emulate?"
If you are somewhere around 18 years of age:
1. Go to college.
2. At college, join a variety of campus organizations. Don't be afraid of trying some type of leadership role. You don't have to be student body president, but you can serve on the publicity committee, the campus newspaper, the annual, etc.
3. Finish college so that you are qualified for the kind of employment that carries a good salary and benefits package. Even if it turns out that you don't have to work, the background to qualify for decent employment is important.
4. Becomre active in your community. Join a community service club (Soroptomists, Kiwanis, Rotary, Lions, etc.) I guarantee that every one of the clubs that I've mentioned will welcome you as a new member.
5. Read the daily paper. You don't have to "study" it; just be aware of the issues in your community, state, nation, and world so that, if something comes up in conversation, you'll be able to contribute.
6. On occasion, drop in to a meeting of the city council, county Board of Supervisors, or whatever governing body you have locally.
7. At election time, if you TRULY like one of the candidates, volunteer to help with the election. Again, I guarantee that you'll not be turned down. You may have to start off by working telephones or planting yard signs, but be aware that everyone else started that way. In fact, although I'm on the executive board of a local candidate right now, I still volunteer to place lawn signs, work the phones, and help "get out the vote" on election evening.
8. Phone the police department and schedule a ride-along. You'll have an interesting evening, and the cop's conversation will give you a lot of information about the people.
9. Help out at your local library, arts council, chamber of commerce, hospital.
10. Most communities have a special day when citizens plant trees or flowers, clean up city parks, or engage in some other beautification project. Help out.
Have some business cards printed. If you don't have a business, just put your name, e-mail address, and any other information that you feel comfortable about giving out.
The advice that I'm giving you has a single purpose: Start to build networks with the "movers and shakers" of your community. I think that you'll find that the most active people are also the brightest, most fun to be around, and friendliest.
You don't encounter pessimists, people with lousy attitudes, or laggards giving of themselves to the community in which they live.
If some of the other people who have answered this question think that this makes you an elitist, consider the source. Most of them can't spell or write a cogent sentence. They'll not be in the circle of friends that you seek.
Good luck.
P.S. I grew up in poverty, my parents never voted, the people in my immediate environment were distrustful of people in government, and folks in my neighborhood had no real aspirations in life. The college experience changed me, and I've seen it change others.
Several years ago I had a student who was a former gang member, a drug user, and well on his way to life that would be spent largely behind bars. Next month, he'll be inducted as vice president of my Kiwanis Club. If he could talk to you, he'd tell you the same things that I have. It's no secret, and it works.
2006-08-13 00:04:19 · answer #2 · answered by Goethe 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you're just unrealisitc and have unrealistic standards. Perhaps you've met the wrong people--where you meet people can dictate the types of people you meet, at least to some degree. If you only meet people at pubs, you just might be meeting alcoholics, for example. Maybe you tend to idealize people at first and then become disappointed when reality sets in.You be the judge.
2006-08-17 16:19:14 · answer #3 · answered by heyrobo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rated by whom? Your own ideas/ideals? Society's? Is it just trendy or lasting?
Raise your standards. Those who think like you will naturally follow. Unfortunately, there are many, MANY more who will never live up to your standards.
2006-08-12 18:56:25 · answer #4 · answered by Juliart 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will always ALWAYS be around some sort of jerk. Stop having such high expectations of people and embrace the 'first rate people' you have.
2006-08-12 18:55:28 · answer #5 · answered by Ell 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You attract what you are. People who are like us are drawn to us. So, to attract first-rate people, become one. Work on becoming the best person you can be, inside and out, and other people who are like that wil be drawn to you.
2006-08-12 18:54:40 · answer #6 · answered by MissM 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How do you define first rate people? Are you one?
Usually likes attract.
2006-08-12 18:51:49 · answer #7 · answered by Texas Cowboy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just act like one of them who you wanted to be with.
2006-08-12 18:51:18 · answer #8 · answered by Mimi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Join a group that thinks as you do. Go meetups.com and find one.
2006-08-17 13:20:37 · answer #9 · answered by Tedi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lower your standards a little. Nobody is perfect.
2006-08-12 18:56:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id say stuck up.
2006-08-12 18:52:09 · answer #11 · answered by Tim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋