We broke up and he left for holland. he was 20 at that time. I got married to my ex husband. after my divorce I left to settle in another country. When I return to my Island I met him trough a frien he used to inquire about me. One in a while he visits the island for bussiness, We met after 35 years. I fell in love all over again. We went out to dinner, we kissed and necked like two teenagers. (no intimacy) and kept seeing each other while he was here. I felt elated, happy, and loved. we are older and wiser now he told me and want ever lie to me. we made great plans. I totally believed him. we call each other every week and have long interresting conversation. The problem is, by now he's married with 5 grown up children. his company didn't sent him any more on a another bussinness trip, I don't fuss or argue with him although I'm dying to see him and kiss him. the other night i told him I don't want to be with a married man, he got angry and hang up on me, Any serious advice
2006-08-12 18:30:41 · 22 answers · asked by racheljackson54 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
This is going to be tough to hear, but it is time to let him go. I am sorry, but falling in love with a married man will only lead to heart ache. I am sure that you two could make great friends, but nothing more than that. He is not going to leave his family behind to be with you despite what he might tell you. You sound like a really nice lady in a really mean perdicament that is going to end up with a broken heart. Please drop him like a hot potato and move on to find another (preferably single) man who will care for you as much as you care for him. It sounds to me like you are the only one in your current relationship that has feelings.
2006-08-12 18:46:01 · answer #1 · answered by absolute genious 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The hanging-up-on-you thing would have done it for me.
Serious advice (honestly) is this: You said his company isn't going to send him there any more, so that kind of takes care of whatever you had going anyway. The married thing doesn't put you in a very dignified position of being the "island stop-over" before going home. If he ever shows up divorced maybe you could reconsider if you want to overlook the hanging up thing and the lying thing and the willingness to have something going with you even though he's married.
In all seriousness, I can imagine how you may be disappointed that something you thought you might have won't work out. You just have to think of all the people in the world who are grieving the loss of loved ones, who have sick children, who have children fighting in wars and coming back without limbs or brain-damaged.
With all due respect and in all seriousness, maybe you can let whatever nice thing you had for a little while be a nice little memory; but don't grieve over it or stew over it or even think you may get it back. Maybe you "fell in love", but in a world where there are so many other things to grieve over and stew over and deal with, this one isn't worth it.
2006-08-12 18:55:56 · answer #2 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
woweeeeeee ok at first u did not know he was married with five kids, but he did tell you .older / wiser (right) The man is married told you and now all of a sudden company does not send him on trips anymore.What right does he have in hanging up on you for saying you did not want to be with a married man.I would take that as he is going to stay married so get over it.He wants his cake / eat it to.You need to get on with ur life lots of single good men out there be patient he will find you.Meeting again after 35 years was nice but just stay friends,
2006-08-12 18:52:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is married stay away from him. You need to find someone who is not married. His love is for someone else, let him go. He can not do anything for you. Ask him to divorce his wife. If he doesn't then you know where his love stands........He was probably glad to see you too, but this is a married man. You will always be alone with a married man. He has his obligations and that does not include you. Not to sound mean...You are grown don't act like you don't know whats right!!!!
2006-08-12 18:40:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anastacia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he gets angry about you saying you don't want to w/ a married man, then he was just hoping to have you as a mistress. He is comfortable in his marriage and even though not "in love" with his wife he loves her enough that he isn't goin to leave her for you. I know because I am going through the same kindof situation with a man. I am getting out and so should you, before you invest anymore of yourself into a relationship that isn't really what it seems.
2006-08-12 18:38:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone. Move on. If it is meant to be, he will return to you. He has a life without you and many considerations to make for his family. You may be a toy to him, or he may love you deeply, but either way he may never choose to commit to you. I respect you for your statement about not wanting to be with a married man. Have the courage to stand by that statement and good things will happen to you. Believe it. No one ever found true happiness by compromising their integrity.
2006-08-12 18:37:54 · answer #6 · answered by YahooGuru2u 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-04 11:39:09 · answer #7 · answered by ai 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rachel isn't it obvious to you that this isn't the young man you fell in love with.
this is a guy that will cheat on his wife turn to another woman and jeopardize his family all to get have his way with you, as flattering as it can sound he has also been disloyal to you lied and led you on in all your prince charming sounds a lot like a rat if it squeaks like a rat it will bite like a rat don't be strung in by him you deserve a hell of a lot better than this runaway romeo
2006-08-12 18:46:48 · answer #8 · answered by slick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear that your long lost love is married. If you are serious about not wanting to be with a married man then stick to what you believe even if it hurts.
2006-08-12 18:37:21 · answer #9 · answered by theoriginalquestmaker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to re-cap having sweet companion was great & wonderful but it really hurting rite. Yes both of u r married persons & staying apart in different countries.
just cut-off that relationship once & for all,just keep the moment of joy in yr heart forever.making international calls is expensive & it does not help to improve yr relationship in anyway.he got to be with his own family.Cheers.God bless you.
2006-08-12 18:38:09 · answer #10 · answered by Goosters 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋