can someone give me advice?

Question

my aint is HIV positive and she wants to be there when my baby is born.. i will not let her kiss my kids or anthing i feel bad..think im just being over protective of my kids..i wont let her kiss my 2 yr old either

Answer 1

You are not being over protective. HIV can spread through saliva too. I don't blame you for not letting her kiss your kids. A hug is ok, but a kiss is risky. If you feel comfortable with her in the room when you have your baby that should be fine, but tell your doctor and discuss it with him/her first. Your a mom, and your protecting your children. I would ask the same thing of her. She should understand.

Answer 2

This is really disturbing to me. It's also such a surprise (sort of) that there are so many uneducated people when it comes to HIV and AIDS. Did you sleep all the way through high school? Do you watch any form of educational television, whatsoever? Obviously not.

Your kids cannot get HIV from just "kissing" your Aunt. You are not only hurting and disrespecting your Aunt (though I have no idea how she actually contracted it), but you're passing your ignorance on to your children. In my opinion, everyone on here who has said that "kissing is risky" then you should educate yourself too. When it's and Aunt and little kids, there should be no tongue-to-tongue action to begin with. So what kind of salvia exactly are you passing?

Seeing as how it's your Aunt, my advice to you is do what you should've done a long, long time ago and educate yourself on the disease. You will learn that you cannot get HIV by breathing the same air, using the same toilet seat, or exchanging saliva. So if she wants to be there, let her be there. If you don't want her to be there, for the love of God, have a better excuse than she has HIV.

My stepdad has HIV and I only found out about it myself a few years ago. My mother is negative and she gets regular checkups every 6 months. They kiss. They hug. They sleep together. (very protected sex) He has had HIV for 17 years. They have been together for 5.

So, like I said. Educate yourself. Educate your children. Like "Alleycat" said, if it's warm, red, wet, and not yours, don't touch it.

It's easy as that.

Answer 3

ooh thats tough but I do think that you are being a little over protective. It is your motherly instinct to want your children to be safe and I understand that. But you have to also understand that you can not catch HIV just from a kiss or touch. Your aunt I am sure is aware of your precautions and I am sure she tries to be understanding but this is a touchy subject to her. You should try to compromise things with her. LIke things that don't involve blood, like a kiss. It is a very personal choice who is present during the birth and she would understand I am sure if you wanted just the father there, But I see no harm in you or the new baby by her being present...maybe not cutting the cord would be a nice compromise in that situation. One thing you should consider is what you maybe teaching your two year old.. like my aunt is different so I can't love her like the others. I have a two year old and I think that if there was that one person he wasn't allowed affection with it would throw him off in his thinking of wondering why there is this person that he loves so much not giving me sugar when she goes bye-bye. I may not be making sense but I think you are just going with your instincts to protect but maybe a little too far and not in their best interest. I don't mean to sound criticising to you I ain't in your situation and can only speak of what I THINK I would do. I hope to have helped

Answer 4

You can't transmit HIV through a kiss, what you are doing to her sounds really mean.

If you don't want her in the room at all (not the HIV status) then just tell her you are not comfortable having her in there. You only want it to be you and your husband (and stick to the story).

Answer 5

The only way someone can catch it is threw sexual intercourse or having the persons blood get into them like if they have a cut and they touch a cut of a person with HIV who is bleeding the blood can get into the none carriers cut and they can get it.

Answer 6

It's a sad situation but one that I think is necessary. I would have the same restrictions if I were in your shoes. You can try to explain your concerns to her and let her know how much you love her, but at the same time you have to protect your children. I wouldn't take any chances when it comes to the possibility of passing HIV to my kids. Good luck!

Answer 7

you are horrible. You can not transfer HIV by kissing or touching. Only through blood contact or sexual contact. I'm sure you are making your aunt feel so bad. I hope one day you get AIDS and everyone treats you like you have the plague..

Answer 8

You are being ridiculous. Your aunt can not pass on her disease by kissing your children, hugging your children or anything like this. It saddens me that you would leave her out of such an incredible thing like being in the same room when you give birth because you are so uniformed. That is so sad that you think like that. One day you will look back and realize all that you missed by such ignorance.

Answer 9

your aunt can kiss your kids on the cheek or on the top of the head. hiv is transmitted blood to blood contact not threw saliva.

Answer 10

HIV is not transmitted that way. My best friends step-dad has AIDS, and I have no problem with my daughter being around him. He takes care of himself and is very careful. My daughter also knows not to touch anyone else's blood. If it's warm, wet, red and doesn't belong to you don't touch it. It's better to teach them things then to create fear.