Writing a list for eachother detailing the things that get under your skin about the other person.... is it a good or bad idea?
2006-08-12 15:47:16 · 12 answers · asked by Ashes 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
it depends. are you and your spouse willing to be open and honest about it? are you both willing to be understanding and open-minded about what the other tells you instead of taking it to heart and getting angry with one another for being honest? just be sure of these answers before you do this. otherwise you may regret it.
2006-08-12 15:53:57 · answer #1 · answered by southerngrace1030 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why on earth would you do that??? What good could it possibly do? Everyone has little habits that probably annoy their spouses, but having them written out on a list would just make each person defensive, self conscious, embarrassed, and hurt. Why not write out lists of the things you love about the other person?
2006-08-12 23:20:03 · answer #2 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can be a bad idea if only one of you will play this game. And if both will play then instead of making the lists negative perhaps a positive slant will go down better.
Example:
I can't stand the way you snore. It keeps me awake and I just get madder at you.
Instead try: You know you snore. I have heard this can be harmful to you if let go long enough. Could we see a doctor about that and see if you need a sleep study?
All depends if you both will play and what you say.
2006-08-12 23:11:02 · answer #3 · answered by John B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends on the couple, some couples have a hard time talking to each other and some are out in the open about things I think that it is best to speak about it to each other,depending on how long you have been in the relationship.
2006-08-12 22:53:28 · answer #4 · answered by Kristi A 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pull the tension out of face to face verbal encounters. Do you both put these lists in sealed envelopes, hand them to each other on the driveway, each of you drive 20 miles in opposite directions, open the envelopes and scream?
2006-08-12 22:55:38 · answer #5 · answered by ricosuarve 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is a good idea because im going through a seperation because that didnt get done and didnt know what was going on and thought everything was alright boy was i wrong
2006-08-12 22:53:19 · answer #6 · answered by mitchjr3277 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a good idea. It certainly is a better alternative to yelling and screaming. Often times our mates misinterpret what we're trying to say by how we say it and vice versa, then a big fight erupts.
2006-08-12 23:06:53 · answer #7 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, but make a rule that for every bad thing you say, must must also say a good thing.
2006-08-13 00:59:56 · answer #8 · answered by happygirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it can be good for the marriage, if u have a hard time talking to ur spouse.
2006-08-13 00:58:04 · answer #9 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how easily offended the other gets.
2006-08-12 22:53:52 · answer #10 · answered by underdunk75 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋