Which one sounds more polite?

Question

You need to do this or can you do this? Its just I"ve worked at places where the shift managers would talk like that to me and it irritated and annoyed me alot, especially when I worked at Taco Bell.

I mean if you want people to do something for you, it's best to ask , not command them unless you're in the military.

Answer 1

I would say " Diana, would you please go to the diningroom and clean all the dirty tables ?Thank-you....

Answer 2

How about "I need you to do this please. Do you see any problems?" (grammar aside)
(After a couple of times the second part is implied and people know it is safe to speak up on their own - as opposed to just complaining about the boss amongst themselves)

"You need to do this" makes a presumptuous assumption that the employee's needs and the manager's needs are the same. I have learned that there are sometimes valid reasons these needs may be in conflict. For example, a manager may not always be aware of conflicting obligations that a staff member may have. These conflcts need to be resolved or (if the can't) alternative actions taken. One role of a project manager is after all to remove blockages that stop team members from doing their job. I have to know about those blockages and barking out commands is not enough.

The staff member will respond if there is a conflict and then both can work the problem out.

Note that 95% of the time things can be worked out. It rare situations, however, a manager has to step up to the plate and put the task at hand over being nice. 'I don't feel like it" is probably not a good response for the employee.

Answer 3

Many of the entry level jobs involve control and training (micromanaging) workers. Sometimes it is annoying -- especially if you have already learned the job, intend to do it and to have to hear someone repeat those simple directives.

Best is to go on to jobs where the environment is different. Or get a degree and be in a position where you are boss (who is more sensitive and can be a better leader & still get the job done right).

Answer 4

Yeah, but after you've spent long enough in the real world you realize that the world isn't a very nice place, and neither are many of the people in it, and you just need to live with it and do your job, regardless of how you're addressed as long as at the end of the day you're bringing home the bacon.

Plus: 'Could you please do this?' or EVEN 'Do you mind doing this, or that?' its a regular statement - although duh, its your job they're not asking you to do it, they're telling you - its not like you really have a choice, but it still sounds politer.

Answer 5

Well, its a command regardless of how it is phrased.
Most companies, like the military, have a pecking order
of responsibility. If your manager asks you politely to do
something, you'd better do it.

However, we live in a society where we try to be civil to each
other. Pleases and thank-yous count for a lot.

"Can you XXX", although it is semantically odd ("Yes, I can!"),
is probably the most polite way of doing it in American culture.
"Please XXX" may be as polite elsewhere (and is not as
semantically confusing).

Eventually, especially when things are moving quickly,
"XXX" or "You need to XXX now" are inevitable and there's
no point in resenting it.

Answer 6

The person should say, "The cups need to be stocked. (Your name), would you stock the cups?
The person should listen for a response from you and say, "Thank you."

That is a polite example, however, some people do not know better and other people just do not give a darn. Either way do not become like the people who are not polite to you.

Answer 7

usually it is better to tell some one and it is more correct. may not seem polite but to ask someone implies their ability to tell them makes the assumption that they possess the ablity. would you rather someone assume you knew how to take out the trash or ask you if you had the ability to. which is more degrading when you think about it.

also i am in the military as a reservist but do a lot of supervisory work at home in my civiilan job.

Answer 8

Can you because you might not be that obligated depending on what it is their asking of you to do. It definetly is much more polite their so high above the person, and that their better than you cause their not doing it,and you are. But I agree with you, I THINK its rude.

Answer 9

It really isn't anything to become annoyed about. Especially in a fast paced place such as a fast food restaurant.

Answer 10

it should always be in the form of a question, even if there is really no choice, it just sounds so much better, but then most people dont seem to get that do they?

Answer 11

It's your supervisor's job to tell you what to do. It's great if you get a polite one, but they are under pressure too, so if their commands come out as abrupt, well, you gotta suck it up.