I am very shy. I don't know how to 'voice' what I feel or even what is obvious. I have no luck with guys, but is that what is really putting a damper on the whole relationship deal?
I do answer people if they ask me a question though, or say hi.
is being shy, really a bad thing?
2006-08-12 13:19:07 · 9 answers · asked by Panda 3 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
I am gernerlly a quiet person. I have found over the years that around the right person I am very talkative and I would bet that you are to. You just haven't clicked with someone yet but you will.
2006-08-12 16:00:40 · answer #1 · answered by bobcat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shyness is not bad! It can be really sweet in some ways. Don't worry if you are shy! It's OK, that's a part of your makeup.
Don't try to be something you are not because you can't maintain it and if a guy gets attracted to the false image you are portraying and you try to be your real self this may drive him away and you don't want that do you?
You just haven't met that special someone yet1. Be patient, he'll come along and like you just as you are because that is what will attract him to you!
2006-08-12 20:29:15 · answer #2 · answered by December Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being shy comes from low self esteem. Try gaining some confidence by becoming proficient in some area. That confidence will spill over into other areas.
Introspective people might be described as shy, but actually they don't care much what other people think and so they keep their opinions to themselves.
2006-08-12 20:45:22 · answer #3 · answered by Answers1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shy. Quite. Which doesn't mean submissive, but someone that wouldn't make such a big fuss out of almost everything. Could I say shy and assertive at the same time? Hard to find?
2006-08-12 21:35:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shy is not a bad thing at all... it is just a good a personality trait as any other. In fact overly talkative or obnoxious is a turn off to me. Don't feel as though there is something wrong with you.
2006-08-12 20:27:14 · answer #5 · answered by Heatmizer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think any of us can speak for "most guys," just ourselves. This isn't a subject I've ever heard discussed by any of the guys whenever we get together.
I'm very shy, too, but not always. Not nearly as much as when I was younger, but still more shy than most. I, myself, have dated girls who are "too shy" and ones who are "too outspoken."
I'll call my first fiancee "Rita." Rita never shut up. She was a word-processor from hell. You always knew what Rita thought, every second of every day. And it changed from day to day, as long as she had something to rant about. You could never have one silent, romantic moment with her. It was impossible to have any peace of mind because I was always getting a piece of her mind. And she didn't exactly have any to spare. Needless to say, things didn't work out. BTW, Rita has been married at least six times that I know of, so I don't exactly feel like the Lone Ranger here. I don't think it was a character trait that I alone had trouble dealing with.
I'll call my second fiancee "Lana." Lana was very, very shy. The night I met her, I knew instantly that I was in love with her. Unfortunately, she was with a friend of mine, Jeff. She was giving me subtle signals, though, so I didn't give up on her entirely. I found out later from Jeff that he was dating Lana's sister and that she was just his friend. So I had him and his date stop back by with Lana again.
I could read her signals, but she wasn't about to voice anything. Lana wouldn't even tell me if she wanted Thousand Island, Creamy French, or Ranch on her salad. I had to decide for her. After about the tenth date, after much coaxing from me, Lana finally snuggled up and gave me "the look," so I kissed her gently. She kissed right back, and there was no big secret how she felt about that. I was never happier in my life. Did I mention that I'm shy, too? I thank God that she met me halfway, or I'd have never gotten anywhere at all with her. And we both would have missed out on so, so much.
Unfortunately, a year later, Lana left me to go back to her ex-husband. She was so shy that she'd never mentioned that she was married. She was so shy that she'd never mentioned that things weren't perfect between us, that maybe I could have made it better for her somehow, if we'd ever gotten around to discussing it. The first clue I had was when she left me forever. That broke my heart, and I'm so sure that someone so loving and gentle never had any intention of doing that. I know she'd loved me, too.
So I guess I like a girl who isn't at either extreme. I prefer shy and mysterious to constantly loud and obnoxious, though. That's the easiest choice I'll ever have to make.
I hope you have better luck with guys and I have better luck with women. You sound a lot like my old best friend, Sara. I think we may have once been in love with each other, but we're both so shy the subject never once came up. I haven't seen her in years and I always wondered what could have been...
Peace and love.
2006-08-12 21:09:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what is really weird is that im kind of quiet too, however the guys i seem to attract are the direct opposite, they are media peeps djs and entertainers/ and they always try to bring me out of my shell~~(i think they sort of see me as a little sister or and try to make me more sociable" , i guess it can be sort of a challenge to guys at times) just always be yourself and you will find the nicest people , of different "types" attracted to you:)
2006-08-12 20:41:49 · answer #7 · answered by darkangel1111 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no 'most guys'. Different guys like different girls with different attributes; the reverse is also true.
2006-08-12 20:25:48 · answer #8 · answered by haxx0r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no
it couldnt be
guys like quiet, shy girls
2006-08-12 20:23:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋