we came from the same primary school and r going to the same high school. she met this boy, his name's Joel, who's in her class-we're not- and they fell 4 each other from the moment the saw each other. they ended up 2gether in late October. then in january, things started to go hay-wire. it started wen evertime someone asked them if they were 3gether, he said "no, we're just acquaintances". so she felt kinda bad and thinks that he meant it. after that his best friend told her that Joel said they should avoid any form of contact with each other 4 the next 2 weeks. that didnt really last, only 4 a week. then his best friend said that Joel was only pretending to like her. she got really angry and called Joel a lot of names. after that it got mended but on and off they're both think the other is confusing them. then she got really frustrated and told joel that she didnt like him, so she wouldnt look bad if he didnt like her. since then he shuts her out. it's KILLING her inside. help????
2006-08-12 11:46:27 · 13 answers · asked by cute_but_psycho876 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
she got the new email, but wenever she IM him, he pretends he doesnt know who she is and wen she tells him he always says he has 2 go. i told her that maub he just wants some space. but she's dying. everyday we talk on the phone and IM and he's all she can think about. sometimes she cries herself to sleep at night or eats 4 the entire day. i'm really worried about her, we've been friends for 5 years and she's always helped me out with my probs. now i want to help her-and she didnt want to ask the question herself cuz she said "it would hurt too much". i've never seen her this hung up over a boy.
2006-08-12 11:54:50 · update #1
Ahm...it sounds like BOTH your friend and this guy are playing games and need to grow up.
2006-08-12 11:50:23 · answer #1 · answered by nava_clue 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well, He should shut her out. She shouldn't have told him that she did not like him, that was not the smartest thing to do.
Listen, they are both very young, she should not be wasting her life on one person. There are plenty of years ahead . Now is the time to be making several friends and creating good memories and not stress out over a serious relationship. A relationship is a huge responsibility. it takes a sound mind and a mature person to handle one. Obviously, she is not quite mature enough to handle a relationship quite yet.
I can clearly understand why there is a lot of confusion.
Explain to your friend it's not the end of the world. Let her know that there are plenty of people out there. Lot's. She might not think that there are others, but really there are. She needs to make more friends. Keep her busy, take her somewhere and she will feel better
2006-08-12 11:59:13 · answer #2 · answered by HappyCat 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm afraid that this won't have the same effect on you, such as it would have on your friend. Because you are not in their position.
Then again, you might help her go trough all of it, if you make her understand the meaning af the whole situation.
Sometimes, only a bit of non-understanding might destroy something precious. In this case, your friend wasn't aware of true face of her b-fr. Couldn't blame her, but she made kind of a mistake by taking it for much more serious, then it is, actually.
She's kind of a person who's very aware of her acts. That's why she didn't responded on time, while his demanding of their relationship. She even took his "wish", 2 weeks of avoiding him? I'm pretty sure she understood pretty much what was going on, but hoping that things aren't going in the way she thought they did. She wa STILL expecting. And too much of expectations always ends with a crush, when facing the reality.
Her b-fr sucks a lot. And unfortunatley, there are a lot of guys like him, who take everything for granted, and destroy it, with no guilty concious. And you can't help them. But it counts when they do a thing such as he did, just playing a "game" with her. She made it easier. She trusted him.
Now, it's all fallen on her back. more like on her soul. She suffers because she finds her self guilty, and because she responded to his jerking too late. It's always too late.
Help her realise that such a persons like he is shouldn't be treated as friends at all(finally, always take an advantage on someone else). He hurt her, though now she's aware that she's allowed him.
Tell her, there's no point in fighting with him. It WILL NOT help, trust me. I had a lot of such a "frineds". It's just too low for her to be the type of a person as he is.
He told her he didn't like her. Then she should celebrate! Good thing, like she would even care if he liked her. Cause he worths NOTHING.
She has to move on, it would be disaster if she keeps any good feelings about him. It is time to go over him.
She's learned her lesson. For once, and hope for rest of her life. Only people who really give you a credit should be defined as a friends.
Don't let her hate him. He's not woth of even that.
He's worth of (only) IGNORING. He made his goal.She failed. And now he's singing victory song.
It's time to get up. And say that no MAN should ever do that to her. He WILL become a past.
2006-08-12 12:18:20 · answer #3 · answered by Kaja 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I can't help with the bf problem, but I can think of a way to cheer her up for at least a day. You should take her to a movie, or maybe have a sleepover with a game of truth or dare and some ben & jerry's. Than you can do makeovers if you want. Or, if you don't like sleepovers, I suggest a trip to the mall, go to a store you both like, and try on super-cute outfits. Even if you can't afford them, you can at least see how great you both look in the clothes. Or if you guys are tomboys, maybe try going to a sports game with her, or playing a game of mini-golf.A concert would be good to, if her favorite band, or even one she likes, is in town. Just try to make her feel better, and at least you can see her happy for a little while.
2006-08-12 11:57:17 · answer #4 · answered by foreverdreaming 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Joel is a "JERK". I know it hurts when a guy shuts you out but she needs to take some time to realize that she deserves way better. You as her friend need to be there for her. Does she love him? If she does then it is going to be hard to get over him. She needs to show this jerk that she doesn't need him. This might be bad advice but maybe she should find some guy that is hotter than Joel and show him that she can do better.
2006-08-12 12:06:13 · answer #5 · answered by Angel 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i am srry to tell u that but i think u should 1. stay out of the situation!!! u dont want to get cought or in the middle of a cat fight! let them calm down and work it out when it is a better time! maybe u should talk to an adult u trust that can keep its mouth shut!!!! lol. srry i have had a situation like this and the adult spreaded it every where!!lol. not great. maybe that adult can help them sort things out. but make sure that they know about it! and just once again stay out of the situation! they will work it out just like most couples do!!! they will both move on and obiously she is not the right man for her since he wont admit that they are datting u have to admit that! ok so if u have any questions email me at reallyirishgirl@yahoo.com i hope this really helps u! and just my big point is to stay out of situation!!!
katie
2006-08-12 11:57:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hey I seen this, " As the World Turns ", LOL I would tell her that she would be better off without him and move on. Keep your ears open and I am sure that you will find someone that likes her and has had a crush on her, then tell her and that will cheer her up. Good luck.
I see she doesn't want to give up, you need to set it up where they can meet and let her talk to him, but when she does let her know that if this doesn't fix things she really needs to move on. Good luck.
2006-08-12 11:54:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your friend must appreciate who she is and that she is worthy of being with someone who openly wants to be with her. If he truly liked her, then he should want everyone to know. It sounds like he is playing games with your friend. She needs to focus her energy on building her self-esteem and then finding someone who is worth the effort. She doesn't need to be with someone who isn't serious about her nor with anyone who doesn't appreciate her. Don't settle for just anyone. Wait for the guy who will appreciate you and will treat her like a precious jewel. Believe it or not, there are guys out there like that. You have to get rid of the bad to make room for something great!
2006-08-12 11:55:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I guess u have something in ur mindbut, u have written something else. Anywayz see wen we r choosing our friends we sometimes meet wrong peoples and that causes breakups. If u and ur friend had the fight then try to figure it out it was ur fault or his/her. U know whether they r fit to be ur friend or not. Everyone is nt like that. Anywayz u apologies with ur friend if u have ur faults. Coming to the love matter, if u love them say directly and they r urs . Never keep the feelings in urself say it if u love that person. All the best :)
2016-03-26 23:26:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no the reason he keeps lying about the relationship is so he can be open 2 mess with other girls.
tell ur friend she needs 2 dump hiim,
trust me, i kno how we (men) think
dont believe the hype thats how men behave soooo easy 2 see thru
2006-08-12 11:51:51 · answer #10 · answered by p34nu7bu773rj3lly7im3 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All of you high school girls will be in and out of love through out your 4 years of high school...Let me tell you girls,watch out for any guys because they are out for one thing..that's the big S (sex)...And they will tell you anything to get into your pants...Tell your friend to move on...There bigger fish to catch out there,and don't take all your love nest to your heart...it's just not worth it...Think about it,and you will see i am right...YOUR FRIEND...
Clowmy
2006-08-12 11:58:27 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋