What do you say to a person Greiving?

Question

My freind has just lost her young sister,just what do you say to comfort her without being intrusive.

Answer 1

I just lost my little sister too. Don't be afraid of making your friend cry as they will cry at some point anyway whether you say anything or not. Offer to be there for them , it's not so much what you say it's more about being prepared to listen or just be there to keep your friend company and try to help them to get on with normal things, Offer to go for a walk or invite them out somewhere or just to your house. Say when you want me, or when you're ready to talk/go out I'll be here for you, Your friend may be worried about upsetting you if they talk about there sadness and making you cry, . They may have a total change of character or may even appear to be moody or vacant. However remember they might not be thinking straight. I have very little recollection of the past few weeks since my sister died. Right now I can't talk about it to my family but I can talk to my friends because I know I won't upset them in the same way. You sound like a really caring person and a really good friend to have around at a sad time. Don't be afraid of mentioning death or funerals or things that this persons sister used to do.
e.g. "Marie would have loved going on this walk with us wouldn't she, she would have been looking at all the boy's, flowers, clothes shops."
Personally there is nothing worse than people trying to pu$$y-foot around. My friend the other day shuddered and said "Ooh someones just walked over my grave", The look on her face after she said it and then apologising cracked me up it was so funny. Coz she's my best mate I knew she wasn't trying to upset me and I am just so thankful that she's there for me and She told me that I shouldn't be worried about upsetting her or not being able to think straight as she would rather share my sadness than watch me going through it alone, and if I didn't get in touch for a while not to worry, she would ring me anyway just to check to see if I needed anything. Try to be yourself too.
All the best.

Answer 2

When I lost my best friend I found that the one thing I hated was when people came up to me and said they were sorry. It made it sound as though it was their fault even though it wasn't. My advice, don't say you're sorry. However, don't just say nothing at all. Some of my other so called friends pretended that nothing had happened and we are now no longer friends. I ended up suffering on the brink of depression because they just ignored what had happened. So yes, let them know you're still around, but also respect their space. Make sure you're accessible at all times of the day so you can talk.

Answer 3

It would be best to say you're there for her if she needs to talk. Unless you know how to handle things properly it's best to listen more than to say anything. Give her some comfort and reassurance that the pain will ease given time. If you knew her sister and she wanted to go over their times together then you could contribute to that in a positive way from your experience and knowledge of her sister.

Answer 4

You just need to let her know that you are there for her to talk to or help in a practical way if she needs you. Just a few words will do. Sometimes its the practical things. For example, when you are grieving you don't always feel like going to the shop for milk but you would really appreciate it if someone dropped off some basic essentials for you.

Answer 5

Just listen tell her your sorry hold her hand. And then a few weeks from now remember her loss People forget to quickly think of her at holidays and birthdays anniversaries are hard folks sometimes never stop grieving they only learn to live with loss.

Answer 6

i just went through the same thing about 2 days ago and basically what i said was " im sorry bout ur brother but if there is anything i can do i want u to know i am always here for you. im here to talk and for anything. i know you are at a difficult time but dont be afraid to ask for help."

hope everything works out =] if u need anything else let me know



try to be patient with the gireving person!

http://familydoctor.org/079.xml
^ check that out its about grieving and u may find it helpful

Answer 7

Sometimes, your mere presence is enough for a friend to know that you are there for her...but if you are to say anything, you just tell her that you know it's painful to lose someone you really love but she must learn to accept it because it's certain that it's what her younger sister would want her to do.

Answer 8

Say, I am sorry for your loss. I can't completely understand what you are going through (unless you have lost a close relative too) but I am here for you. If you want to talk, or just want someone to be close and hold your hand. I am here.

Answer 9

You say something like [I'm here if you need someone to lean on] or you could send them a sympathy card.But most of all don't tell them you know what they are going through unless you have really gone through it. Just be there and listen.

Answer 10

There are no right words apart from saying that you are always there for her whenever she needs you. Offer her a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear.