2006-08-12 07:42:02 · 13 answers · asked by benam 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
there i am left with deep breath. then with a smile i leave child with his mother hoping to find my wife in the midst of the mother.
2006-08-12 07:43:41 · update #1
why am supposed to be nice? i write with malice towards one and all.
2006-08-12 08:05:27 · update #2
Because your son wants to be number one....and you are trying to get in on his 'action'. Unfortunately it's natural...as long as he's getting plenty of love and attention from both of you, you may need to let him know that he's had his turn for a hug from Mommy and now you need one. (of course, I'm assuming you just want to kiss her and have a bit of cuddle.....not sex!)
Oh, and eventually this phase passes...for some kids it's around 5, for others it could be 8. You best set the rules or you're going to be going without for awhile.
2006-08-12 07:50:32 · answer #1 · answered by baciandrio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow you know I had a LOT of trouble as a mom realizing that I was MORE than JUST a mom. It kind of sucks you in. Try to talk to her. Wait until your boy goes to bed and then romance her. If she says she's too busy try helping her get what ever she is doing done. It will help her relax. If that doesn't work right away then what you need to do is spend some time together. If she is insistant that she has work to do then start helping her on a regular basis and use that time to talk and get to know eachother again. If she brings the conversation back to your child then smoothly but regularly change it. If she asks why you're doing it then tell her that you would be MORE than happy to talk about the little guy when he's awake but that you want to know how SHE is doing and how SHE feels about things. Remind her that it's ok to be a mother AND a wife, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Tell her your child is wonderful, well adjusted and well taken care of because of her but that it doesn't change the fact that she's an individual and still has a right to her own life as long as her child doesn't suffer from it. Reinforce her parenting and just jump in and be a great dad when your son is there. Maybe by chance what your son wants is to be more of a focus of your attention or maybe he just sees his two favorite people in the world together and just can't wait to be in the middle of it. The biggest thing is that mommy is always on call but she doesn't have to ACT like mommy all the time. The best way to get someone to do something is by being understanding and talking and being encouraging and supportive. You can do this and so can she but again please understand that sometimes it is very hard to let go of that responsibility and just have fun like an individual.
2006-08-12 08:35:04 · answer #2 · answered by Babydoll_Izzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son should be Number One in your life right now...everything else comes in a close second (including your wife and sexual relations with her).
If you didn't want to become second fiddle, you should have either a) opted for a better form of birth control; or b) gotten a vasectomy.
I'm willing to bet your "little son" is more mature than you are. Grow up and realize that you're someone's father now, and there are more important things in life than sex.
2006-08-12 15:31:29 · answer #3 · answered by brevejunkie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your wife about this and maybe you two can make time for just you two. Sounds like hubby needs a little alone time with his wife. Might have to send the child to your mother or in laws for the weekend. In any case talk to your wife.
2006-08-12 07:49:25 · answer #4 · answered by kitcat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be intimate when the son is asleep at night or not present meaning his away for the weekend or something. trying to work something out while the child is present is hard especially since its a boy...he sees it as a competition for the mothers attention
2006-08-12 08:38:38 · answer #5 · answered by tcb_2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
set aside time for you two to be intimate, if it has to be at childs bedtime so be it, now she is your wife and the mother of your child , there has to be room for both roles she plays in your life. A date night is a good way to start .
2006-08-12 07:48:39 · answer #6 · answered by angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your son is just expressing jealousy because he is attached to his mother. Forget intimacy when the child is awake. It will only frustrate you and make you feel angry toward your son.
When he goes to bed, then talk to your wife about having some private intimate time with her.
2006-08-15 15:24:25 · answer #7 · answered by nick031297 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you being "intimate" in front of your son? You're frightening him. Wait from him to nap, as this gives you both privacy and more time to be alone and uninterrupted, your son may feel "protective" of his mother thinking your hurting her or something. Just a thought.
2006-08-12 07:51:20 · answer #8 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you need to have a talk with your wife... she needs to draw a line and be a wife above a mother sometimes... she is being unfair to you, don't blame your boy, he doesn't know any better
2006-08-16 05:48:43 · answer #9 · answered by braslinbabe85 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Welcome to parent hood :)
There really isn't you can do. Just let her be a Mom and then when the child is in bed at night, make time for you and her to be intimate.
2006-08-12 07:49:29 · answer #10 · answered by tigergirl301 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋