i've found out within the past week that my husband has been lying to me. i asked him if his ex fiance called him, and he said no...but i knew she did. then i asked him if he changed the password on the cell phones online and he said no, and i found out today that he did. i dont know what i should do or how i can trust him again.
2006-08-12 06:41:05 · 34 answers · asked by me 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sounds like he could be hiding something BUT you should really look into why the situation has gotten to this stage. Perhaps he is just retaliating for something you did? Possibly you are so invasive he feels blocked into a corner, he decided to freak you out. Or hes tired and sick of the way you treat him so yeah, hes chatting with his ex now. Guys dont just marry someone they love, then start talking to their exes. There is a reason for it.
2006-08-12 06:54:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. Trust is sooo hard to get back when one has been lied to.
This certainly sounds very suspicious. Normally, I try to look at all aspects of the situation, but in this case you have caught him lying to you and it isn't like you don't know who this is who called, so you already have a lot of the answers...in answer to your question..what should you do? I would say to confront him about it again, and tell him that if he wants this other person, then you would rather just end it because you don't want to be in a relationship where there is lying and deceit. Another option would be to suggest marital counseling..the professionals can help with these sort of things.
Keep your chin up and know that this too shall pass...you will be okay. Good luck!
2006-08-12 07:07:36 · answer #2 · answered by ShineOn 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, let me ask two questions (with my apology for answering a question with a question). First, what would you have said to him had he told you that his ex-fiancee had called him and that he'd changed the password on his cell phones? Be honest with yourself when you answer. If he'd have gotten a royal reaming out, could that be why he didn't tell you? If he wouldn't have been yelled at, you may have cause for concern. In any case, it's highly unlikely that the issue causing the friction (if that's what it is) is really his ex-fiancee calling and cell phone passwords. You'll probably need to get down to the basic problems to get things fixed. THAT may well require conselling.
2006-08-12 06:56:09 · answer #3 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once a man starts lying to cover up another lie, it might be time to bail, or simply ask yourself this question....does he still love you, or did he ever??? Once a cheater, always a cheater. Remember, you are a special person and you don't deserve to be treated this way. You deserve only the best. Keep your chin up and know that there is someone out there that will love you and not lie to you.....I've been in the same situation and now I have moved on with a much better man. He loves me for me and also adopted my daughter from my other marriage and we have been married for 9 years now. Pray, it helps...
2006-08-12 06:59:16 · answer #4 · answered by hippychic 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say talk to him. Sit him down and have a real heart to heart. If you know that he isn't being honest then tell him and tell him how you know. When you said "I do" you made a promise to him. I know what he's doing may be breaking that promise but if you took out the time, effort and money to be with your husband don't you think it's worth it to at least try and work this out. Of course I'm not telling you to stay with him if he is truly doing something wrong. What I am saying however is that before you jump to conclusions about what's going on get the facts. Let him know how you feel and what you are feeling. Ask him to consider how what he is doing is effecting you.
2006-08-12 06:52:51 · answer #5 · answered by MJ 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ok you know he is lying . He knows you know.
You see you have him trapped , he sounds like the kind of guy that denial will be his only option.
I don't think he is cheating on you in his mind.
He thinks its his ex who is contacting him , so he just talks.No harm, But he knows you will not go for that .So he will always be in denial
Do you understand?
When you ask him about this , he is shaking in his shoes. He wont admit it because he is scared of loosing you.
Your the wife not the ex . If he wont admit it . Hell call the ex ask her not to call him again.
Do not make a scene , your better than that women.
2006-08-12 07:34:30 · answer #6 · answered by cardog 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are looking for anything to accuse him of lying!! Maybe you have a little insecurity problem. Come on maybe he forgot about the questions u asked...some folks have busy lives and don't have time think up possible fibs their hubbys or wives may have told them...get a job or get involved in some kind of club or something..
2006-08-12 07:14:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is NOT honoring your marriage!!!!! Cancel his cell phone now. Demand he stop that **** or you WILL file for divorce.
He's either IN the marriage or OUT ---- he cannot play games!
You are getting short-changed!!!! You need to realize a real man that really LOVED You would NEVER do that.
Develop some standards and hold him to them immediately or OUT he goes. No second chances. Men will be dogs if you LET them.
2006-08-12 08:08:51 · answer #8 · answered by Lake Lover 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One thing is certain -you can not trust him.Is he a compulsive lier.Does he lie with others also ? If he does not -he is hiding some affair he is having.. tell him he is caught .Do not be submissive .Seems you do not wish to get separated, Why? He is cheater,I don't think your relationship will last. Be prepared for divorce and get best alimony you can.
2006-08-12 07:12:05 · answer #9 · answered by shribharatpshubh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
men lie little lies to cover up a big lie. In your case, he has two big lies, so he must be covering up something huge, like still talking to his ex fiance and liking it.
You CANT trust him again. You would be very stupid to. But of course most women or men dont listen to the advice people give anyway, so if you plan on not taking any of our advice, you might as well allow him to lie to you over and over again, until you catch him in bed with his ex. good luck with that!
2006-08-12 07:50:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well if he is lying about something as small as those things.
What else is he covering up? And Why?
I suggest counciling and if that does not work then get a divorce.
No one deserves that kind of disrespect at all.
You look pretty and should have no trouble hooking up should you get a divorce.
I wish you the best of luck.
2006-08-12 06:45:39 · answer #11 · answered by Biker 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋